How to Save a Life
by VampsofTwatlight
Summary: As temptations, needs and desires spiral out of control what will it take to make it back to the one your heart belongs to? Rated M for mature content. AH/AU
1. Author's Notes

**Hello all you lovely readers,**

**We told you that we would be back. We decided to delete the chapter we had posted for the contest just so you new readers would be completely shocked when you get to it.**

**We are so excited about this story. This is a true collaboration between the three of us. You will probably be able to see a little of each of our styles throughout the chapters. We hope you enjoy reading it as much as we have had developing the story line. **

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**Before we start down this crazy journey, let's get some things out of the way.**

**One: None of us are Stephenie Meyers. If one of us eats a native herb and magically switches places with her – you guys will be the first to know. **

**Second: This story will have some themes that you may not like. So after chapter three, if you feel like crying, screaming or all around bitching us out- remember we warned you.**

**Third: We realize that there are a few stories just coming out that have some of the same basic ideas as ours. Goldentemptress has a great one that is similar BUT NOT THE SAME!!!! We have been working on this since before the contest started. We even said it was going to be a full story. So don't get your knickers in a wad – just read them all and enjoy. We all are creative enough (and obviously) smart enough – to have found an idea that several different people thought would make a great story. It is just by pure coincidence it is around the same time. I guess that little Forbidden Love contest got everyone's evil thinking caps going!! **

**Finally: This story will have SMUT! This is a fact!!! Lots and lots of lovely smut…and angst…and suspense…and fuck it's gonna be great. But please only read it if you are mature enough to handle it. We like sex, and foul language and playing around with ideas that even in real life we don't deem acceptable.**

**So sit back and get ready for… **_**How to Save a Life.**_


	2. Chapter 2: Work Before Pleasure

**We still don't own Twilight. **

**However, it is safe to say that Edward owns I'mwiththevampires08, Emmett is the possession of mischief-maker1 and twilightmom is not picky, she'll take whatever is left. **

**If you didn't get the update make sure you go back and read the previous chapter. It has all our long ass Author notes that you know you want to read!!**

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How To Save A Life by The Fray

_Step one you say we need to talk  
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk  
He smiles politely back at you  
You stare politely right on through  
Some sort of window to your right  
As he goes left and you stay right  
Between the lines of fear and blame  
And you begin to wonder why you came _

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitter descend  
And would I have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best  
Cause after all you do know best  
Try to slip past his defense  
Without granting innocence  
Lay down a list of what is wrong  
The things you've told him all along  
And I pray to God he hears you  
And I pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitter descend  
And would I have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice  
You lower yours and grant him one last choice  
Drive until you lose the road  
Or break with the ones you've followed  
He will do one of two things  
You will admit to everything  
Or he'll say he's just not the same  
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitter descend  
And would I have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life  
How to save a life

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Bella POV

"Baby, please don't go."

"I have to. You know I don't want to but I have to."

"But it's our anniversary, Edward." I whined. I didn't _mean _to sound like a three year old, but I just couldn't help myself.

"I know that, love, but such is the life an intern. I don't get to pick and choose my days off. I promise, one day when I am a hot shot surgeon, all these sacrifices will be worthwhile." He left the room without as much as a backwards glance.

"Damn it, we are important too. What we have here means something too!" I yelled to his retreating form. It took but a moment for him to return, his scrubs and crocs in hand.

"Don't start this again. You know how hard it for me to be away all the time without you compounding the problem."

"I know, I know. It's just unbearable sometimes." I willed myself not to cry… he hated it when I cried.

"Well I guess since I can't convince you to stay home tonight I'll head on to Mr. Winkler's house. " I said heaving myself from the couch with an exasperated sigh.

"Are they still expecting you tonight? I mean did you find a replacement already?" He asked.

"No, I honestly didn't think I could convince you to stay home from work so I just asked one of the other girls if she would cover for me on the off chance you agreed."

"Well you know, Mr. Winkler loves you best. He'll be so happy to see his favorite caregiver tonight." He came and laid a chaste quick on my cheek, hurriedly tying the waistband of his scrubs.

"We do have a little time, Edward. Feel like a quickie before you leave?"

I reached out trying to loosen the knot of his pants, only to have my hands pushed away.

"I need to get going, Love. Besides we just did it an hour ago."

"It could be a quickie." I sing-songed. I turned to kneel on the couch, swaying my ass in the air.

"Come on, big boy, just a little."

He forced a small laugh, followed by a sigh and I felt my mood start to deflate.

"Bella, don't be silly. I only want to make love to you when I can cherish you, treat you the way you deserve. Now I have to go. Come here and give me a kiss."

I turned and climbed back down off the couch, laying a soft kiss upon my husband's lips.

"I love you, Edward…so much."

"And I you. Will you be back by the time I get home?" He grabbed his jacket off the chair, running his fingers through his bronze mop of hair.

"Of course."

"Well then I'll see you in the morning. Call me if you need me." And with that he was gone.

I shuffled around the kitchen, putting everything in its place. As soon as I was sure that the house was exactly the way he would expect it when he came home, I grabbed my duffle bag from the bottom of the closet and headed out the door.

How has it come to this? I silently asked myself.

My husband, the love of my life, is slowly becoming a stranger to me. Between the regular hospital shifts and the extra surgeries he has been assisting on it is like we are roommates instead of spouses.

Part of me feels like beating the shit out of him sometimes. Yell and scream and throw a fit but how can you do that to someone who loves you so completely. When you know everything he does is for you. The one who puts you on a pedestal and worships at your feet.

You don't. You smile and laugh and live through the pain…no matter if you are slowly dying inside.

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**AN2: We know it's short...this is just a taste. Chapter two is already written and HELLA long...just FYI. **


	3. Chapter 3: ThreeWay Screwup

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN: So...you're excited, right? You wanna find out what's REALLY going on, right? Well...here ya go. **

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Edward POV

I looked at our house and sighed. Bella just didn't get it. She just didn't understand how stressful my job was, how complicated life could be, how hard this was for me. When my parents informed me that I needed a taste of the real world, had to make my own money to pay off my student loans, I had to admit, I was floored. I had a trust fund, but it would not be released to me until the final bill was paid off. And that was _years _away yet. Life was hard when you had to work for a living.

I had been spoiled a bit growing up, I knew that, but damn it, real life just sucked. I blew out another breath and headed toward the hospital.

I was finishing up my pediatric rotation this week. I knew I wanted in on Cardio, had spent all my free time studying cardio/thoracic procedures in preparation for when I could actually begin studying under my father one hundred percent of the time. I was in my first year of residency and was more than eager to put everything else behind me.

Unfortunately, working in peds had given me too much to deal with. Not everyone knew how big my heart was; I kept it firmly hidden behind a mask, to keep it safe. But little Erin Wakefield had gotten past my defenses.

Maybe it was the cancer that ravaged her tiny, twenty two pound, five year old frame, maybe it was the grimaces she tried to cover with a smile as we poked yet another needle into her, maybe it was her parents crying as soon as they stepped out of her room, knowing she was going to die any day, I wasn't sure. But I did suspect her mahogany locks and deep brown eyes had something to do with it. She hurt my heart because she looked like Bella, looked like what my child with Bella might would look like, looked like what my Bella did as a child…

I shook that off, swallowing the tears that threatened my eyes as I felt someone grab my ass. "Doctor Cullen." She purred.

I smirked. "Tanya. To what do I owe the pleasure of your sexual harassment today?"

She giggled. "Oh, Edward. You're such a naughty thing."

"Hey, I'm not the one that pinched your ass. If I recall, it was the other way around."

"And you want me to pinch something else, is that it?"

I pretended to think a moment. "Pinch, no. Suck…? Oh yes indeed. But another time, I've got rounds, love."

She giggled and walked off, looking at her chart once more. I shook my head. The number of female interns and residents in this place was astounding. All of them were…fantastically beautiful. And yes, I followed in true Cullen tradition and flirted with them all. They were throw-aways, they meant nothing. I loved Bella, but that didn't mean I couldn't enjoy looking at pretty objects when they danced before my eyes.

Just then, my phone buzzed with a text message. Alice. Of course. I flipped my phone open and read, _Edward, I'm terrified. What if Jasper finds out? He's going to hate me!_

She wasn't the only one he would hate if it this all came to light. I sent her a text back: _Alice, no one will find out. You know I can keep a secret. It's better that Jasper and Bella don't know. You know how they are. _

I blew out a breath as I closed my phone. Granted, if it got out…but of course…it wouldn't. I'd see to that. I didn't want to make a big deal of it to her, but I was actually worried myself about what would happen if Jasper and Bella knew the truth. It was too late now, though. We had already crossed that line. I cared for Alice. Probably more than I should.

I sent that and waited. It took her only a moment for her to text me back. _I'll be over there in a little while. _

I nodded. This…thing she and I were doing…well, it couldn't be helped. I texted her back; _you know I'll be waiting…_

I took a deep breath as I put my phone back in my pocket and headed to the pediatric wing. I walked in and smiled at Angela, one of the nurses. "How is she this morning, Ang?"

She shook her head and I grimaced as I picked up Erin's chart. I walked in, attempting to smile. Today was going to just blow…I had that feeling.

Five hours, one surgery, and a hell of a lot of hand-holding later, I made my way back to check on Erin. Her pediatric oncologist had given me strict instructions to be whatever the Wakefield's needed. And honestly? I didn't mind it. Not that I would let anyone know…

I passed by Lauren, another of the "easy-peasy" pack, as I'd started calling them and she almost drooled as I sidled up to her, picking out one of the fries from the container she was holding. "Mmm," I muttered appreciatively. "They taste almost as good as you do."

She grinned. "Is that a fact?"

I laughed and continued on my way. She didn't need me telling her that all that fried food she was getting in the cafeteria was making her ass widen. Even _I, _the oft called "belligerent ass" wouldn't tell her that.

I next ran into Jessica, who was really quite pathetic as she flirted. But I gave her the benefit of the doubt. She was still learning. Apparently she'd gotten quite a bit of plastic surgery and was eagerly trying out her new body. "Jessica," I said cordially as I propped up onto the counter next to her, reaching across to grab the chart I needed.

"Oh! Hi, Edward. How are you today?"

My eyebrow rose. "Oh, I'm right as rain, how about yourself?"

She giggled and blushed. "Just fine, thank you. I got on Spalding's rotation for tomorrow."

"That's great." I told her. "I know you must be excited."

She nodded. "Oh, I am. I really enjoy sports medicine. It's just lucky we have a contract with the local sports teams."

"I still think it's funny that Spalding is a doctor in sports medicine." I said with a snort.

She grinned. "Yeah, well, he takes it seriously, so we try not to laugh when we think he can hear us."

"Smart move." I told her. I gave her a wink and said, "I'll see you around."

I stepped into Erin's room, my heart falling just a bit as I looked at her O2 sats. They were continuing to plummet. She wouldn't last more than a day at best. "Erin, how are you?"

"Okay, Dr. Cullen." She said in a small, tired voice. Her father had her in his lap as he read her a story. I looked over at her mother. "Lana? How are you?"

She sighed wearily. She was roughly the same age I was, but the worry and stress had drawn her face. Her husband, Mitchell, didn't look any better. "I'm here, Edward." She said softly.

I bit the inside of my cheek. "Her oxygen saturation is down again." I said quietly so Erin wouldn't hear me.

"It's happening, isn't it?" She asked me.

I nodded. "I'm so sorry, Lana. You know you can rescind the DNR…"

She took a deep breath. "She's suffered enough. It's not worth intubating her and keeping her on a machine. She wouldn't be my little girl. She'd just be an empty shell. At least…" She took another haggard breath. "At least when it happens, she'll be somewhere she won't feel anymore pain." She swallowed. "Anymore…sorrow."

I nodded. I wasn't what one would call a very religious man, but Mom and Dad had me in church every Sunday growing up, so some of it stuck with me. "May God be with you," I whispered, putting a hand on her shoulder. She squeezed it only for a moment before I pulled away. I had to go. Had to…I had to get out of here. Now.

I managed to remain composed before I ran down the hall to the stairwell and up the remaining five flights of stairs to the roof. Once there, I took in a great gulp of air and sank down onto my knees, sobbing.

Once I had managed to get my emotions under control, I picked myself up and headed down to the emergency department. My shift in the pit would start in an hour and I wanted to let the girls down there know I was going to be doing some paperwork and to page me if they needed me before then.

As I walked down the hall, I saw her. I stopped dead. We hadn't talked about what had happened between us last week all that much. It was a fluke. I needed her, she needed me, done, over, right?

I saw her smirk at me as she walked past. She bumped into me and I felt her hand dip into my pocket for just a moment before she continued on her way. I made it to the end of the hall and turned right before I stuck my hand in my pocket pulling out a small slip of paper.

It read; _Meet me in the on-call room. Five minutes. I need you, Edward. Now. _

My cock twitched. Bella just didn't understand. How could I take out all this stress, anger, hurt, aggression on her? I'd done that once, she wanted it rough, and I'd done that. I'd left her pale white skin bruised and I'd vowed never to do that again. But the release…the sweet release of fucking last week had helped me more than I knew. It was…it was like therapy or something. And after the day I'd had, knowing Erin wouldn't live to see the sun rise, while I worried about bills and finishing up this rotation, and stressing about being the best damned doctor I could be to make my father proud…I knew I'd need a piece of that sweet pussy to help me. So I didn't consider it adultery, not really, this was…helping me to be a better man. For Bella. God help me.

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Emmett POV

"Fuckin' Whitlock!"

It was Friday morning and I was scrambling to get ready for work. I woke up early hoping I could finish up the last of the Landry's home today when I realized I was out of clean laundry…or mainly clean underwear.

Sifting through my clean, dry load, I pulled out what I thought was my underwear when in fact, they were Jasper's. I swear, there's a green basket and a blue one. His shit is _supposed_ to go in the blue one. But does it? Hell no…

"What happened?" Jasper came in and leaned up against the frame of my bedroom door. I held up the pair of offending undergarments that I had found among my own things.

"Dude, why the hell can't you put your stuff in your own basket?"

He smiled as he walked over to me and snatched them out from my hand. "Simple. I was running low…now I have two extra pair to last me. Thanks for washing them, Em."

I rolled my eyes and threw out a "fucker" as he strode out of my room. As much as I whine and bicker and bitch at him, I honestly didn't mind having him around. It felt nice to come home to someone after so many years of being a bachelor.

And Jasper could make a mean omelet. Another plus of having him around.

I quickly got dressed in my dirty looking blue jeans and a t-shirt. I knew I freaked out my clients when they realized that I'm the owner of McCarty Construction, but I never was one to sit behind a desk and run my business that way. I belonged outside with my boys, building things like I'd always done.

I walked out into the kitchen where I saw my ready made omelet on my plate and some juice. "Aww, thanks, honey. I promise I'll be home early tonight so that I can properly thank you."

Jasper turned around, apron and all toward me, and flipped me the double bird. "Fuck you, Em. Keep it up and you'll be making your own breakfast from now on."

"Alright, alright. Chill…just trying to show my gratitude to my roomie, that's all."

He eyed me skeptically, but since I said nothing more, he turned around and continued cooking his own.

"By the way…that blue apron looks wonderful on you…really brings out your eyes…"

I quickly ducked as the empty egg carton came flying at my head. I barely missed the soaring projectile and when I looked back at him, we busted out laughing.

"I have to admit, this apron does look a bit girly, but I can't get dirty right now. I've got a class to teach this morning at the college and like I said earlier, I'm running low on clothing."

I polished off my food and jumped up to grab my keys and wallet. "So, what are your plans for tonight? Are we doing something with Edward and Bella?"

Jasper shook his head, moving his blonde hair back and forth. "Nuh-uh. I've got a civil war history showcase to attend tonight and Alice said she had some thing. Not exactly sure what. Anyway, Edward's working and so is Bella."

I nodded. Great. I was the only one not doing anything tonight. Actually, I was the only one without a life to speak of.

"And what about you? I'm pretty sure the great Emmett's got some hot pussy to go after tonight, don't you?"

I gave my best smile and replied, "You know I do. Just wanted to make sure we didn't have current plans already standing. After all, it is Friday night."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Lately though, it seems as if everyone is busy doing their own thing, you know? We never get to see Edward and Bella anymore…Alice is always getting things done for her job as well. It seems that you and I are the only ones not as busy as they are."

"What are you talking about? You're always busy with Alice."

He smiled. "True. So very true…"

I scoffed and headed out the door. "Alright, see you late tonight then, Jasper."

"See ya."

My day passed quicker than I could have imagined. We ended up finishing the Landry house today like I had wanted and now, I was ready to go home and relax.

Upon entering my house, I realized how quiet it was. There was no noise, lights were out and it had the feeling of being empty inside.

Or maybe that was me.

Shaking off the feeling, I made my way to my room and gathered my things for a quick shower. I was determined to relax today, even if I was just going to stay home and veg out on the couch all night.

A mere 30 minutes later found me on my couch, in front of the TV with a sandwich in one hand and a soda in another. Flipping through the channels got me no where fast. Apparently, they showed nothing good on Friday nights…possibly assuming that people had better things to do on what was called 'the first night of the weekend'.

I let out a frustrated growl as I got up and started pacing around my home. Before I could stop myself, my round of self-pity and loathing started up on me.

_How in the world am I still single and approaching 30? Hell, even Edward found somebody. That bastard is happily married to a wonderful, gorgeous woman that would do anything for him. Jasper has Alice and has had Alice for forever now, it seemed. And where the hell did that leave me? With no one…the fifth wheel. _

_It's not like I couldn't ever get anyone. In fact, I've never had problems with the ladies…trouble was, none of them were ever ones I'd want to have a happily ever after with and that's the truth. _

_God…30. I remember so clearly when that age was so far away…it felt like I had a lifetime to get there. And now? Not so much. I was going to die alone…no wife, no kids, no one to love me and care for me, or I them._

_Life sucked, didn't it?_

I quickly shook my head from my inner thoughts and grabbed my car keys. I knew I needed a change of scenery, especially one from my empty house.

I jumped into my little car and decided a drive would be good…at least for now. I had no idea where I was headed, just getting lost on the road as I was getting lost in my head. I knew my family would be very worried about me if I had shared half the thoughts that were coursing through my head, which is why I never told them anything.

My mother tended to worry over me a lot and my father just wanted the best for me. My brother was too busy with his own life and I didn't want to burden either of them with my minor problems. Thing is, deep down, I'd always felt different from my family. Hell, I was different. I was adopted. But I was never, ever treated like I was.

Truth be told, I'd always felt odd…different growing up which only added to my aloneness with myself. Although that was masked pretty well with the slew of women that took up my time. But now that the women were gone?

Yeah…I was so…alone.

I took a look around me, scoping out the area that I had been driving in. It was one of the new developments that had lots of new stores opening up.

I racked my brain, trying to figure out what else was up here when I realized there was a new strip club about five miles ahead of me. I hadn't been to that one yet and I was curious to try it out. Hell, I'd be in a hurry to go to the dentist right now as well, if it got me out of my head.

So, with renewed determination, I headed straight to the strip club, hoping to drown my sorrows in some booze and loose women.

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Bella POV

I threw my bag into the backseat of the car and pulled out of the driveway. Not exactly the way I had imagined my anniversary turning out. Don't get me wrong, we had spent a wonderful afternoon at the park, including a romantic picnic and watching the sunset over the lake. Then we had come home and enjoyed some sweet, tender lovemaking. It was perfect…like always.

In fact that was part of the problem. It was almost always too perfect. It was never raw and dirty or spontaneous. We never just _DID _anything. Everything in our lives was planned out to the minute. We never had sex. It was always sweet, always tender, always love making. And perhaps most women would think that there could be nothing better than to have a gorgeous husband who wanted to treat you like a princess, and I did at first. But there are times when you just want to be ravished, fucked until you can't walk the next day. You want him to grab your ass and start groping you in public. Pound into you until you scream because you can't handle another orgasm. I needed that. And it seemed like that was the one thing Edward either couldn't or wouldn't give me.

I assume it came from the fact that neither one of us had ever been intimate with anyone else. High school sweethearts, we married right out of school. In fact, we were both virgins when we got married. And it was sweet that we have been able to experience all of our firsts together. But it seems as though he is afraid that if we push our boundaries, our sexual boundaries, we may somehow be tainting our marriage.

Take oral sex…I loved to have his cock in my mouth. But like many inexperienced girls, I didn't do so well the first time, and neither did he. So now he was wary every time I suggested it. And in return, since he was so uncomfortable with me performing on him, I just never acted like I cared about him taking care of me, so to speak.

And then there was this one time, we had gone out to dinner, came home and consumed a whole bottle of wine. With both our inhibitions lowered, he had finally taken me like I wanted right in front of our fireplace. I awoke the next morning feeling deliciously satisfied, eager and hopeful that this was the beginning of a new stage in our relationship. But instead I found him silently crying on his side of the bed. It had taken me half an hour to get him to tell me what was wrong.

He pointed out the hand shaped bruises on each of my hips, and the bite mark on my right breast. Like I cared about those. Hell, I fell down at least once a day. I was thrilled to have been marked by my husband, ecstatic actually. He was mortified though. Over and over he apologized, and the more I told him to stop, that I didn't care, the angrier he got. I finally decided to just let it go. I took his apology and the roses that he sent every day for the next week and never mentioned it again.

I pulled into the parking lot and shut off the engine. This was something I definitely would have never, ever seen myself doing, but here I was.

I thought back a little over a month ago. I had been working as a night time caregiver. The money was really great, it fit in with Edward's hours and it allowed me the freedom to work on my writing.

When Alice had suggested the job, I had just laughed. She actually though that a girl who fainted at the smell of blood could be a nurse. Plus I had no medical skills or training. But this job was different. My patient, Mr. Hooper had recently had a stroke and basically just needed someone to sit with him at night. I made his dinner, did some light cleaning, and helped him to the bathroom during the night. I was there to watch over him while his daughter, Nicky took night classes. It was a perfect situation.

Ten months later he suffered another stroke, this one took his life. In one night I lost my job and a dear friend.

Edward had tried to convince me to not go back to work. Coming from a wealthy household, he has a hard time grasping the concept of money. His parents had decided he needed to pay off his student loans on his own before he could inherit his trust. By that time he should already be practicing medicine. So not only did we have all our household bills but his massive student loans as well as my own. There was no way I couldn't work. But he took it as some sort of offense that he couldn't provide for us. I just wanted to make things easier for him. I know he doesn't realize it but I know he is under a tremendous amount of stress.

Unfortunately, since I was hired last, I was the one who would have to wait for a new client to become available. Money seems to be tight everywhere so two weeks later I was still waiting for a call. And then I got one, but not from whom I had expected.

Mr. Hooper's daughter, Nicky had brought me some of my books and personal belongings that she had found around her father's house. I invited her to stay for coffee and two hours later I had the entire story.

Nicky had been able to afford home health care for her father because after going to night school for a few hours every night, she was an exotic dancer. Of course he didn't know what she was doing. He believed she was studying to be an artist, which she was, but the money she was making allowed her to attend school, spend her days with her dad and pay to have someone to take care of him at night.

That was when she asked me if I would be interested in a job.

Of course, my first reaction was to laugh. Me? Shy, clumsy Bella? An exotic dancer? Yeah right. But the more she talked, the more I was intrigued.

Two days later I was dressed in one of Nicky's outfits, teetering around on four inch heels, a mask helping to hide my shame and embarrassment. That was the one thing I insisted on, the mask. I couldn't risk anyone recognizing me. The Cullen name was highly respected around town and I would never want to jeopardize that.

It was unbelievable what happened when I stepped through that curtain onto the stage. I was free. Free of my worries, my cares. It was liberating. I could be anything that I wanted on that stage.

So here I was four weeks later, lying to my husband about what I was doing every night. Trying to justify my actions. But it all boiled down to one thing.

I, Bella Cullen was a stripper.

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**AN2: Oh boy...yup. Get ready for it. Oh, and...please remember, we all three work. Between us we have eight kids ranging from fifteen years old down to like, just over a year. So...don't forget to give us some love in a form of a review. It's the only payment we get. We just LOVE reading how much you love us. It's like orgasms. One review is great...two, even better...but you just keep on giving us one after the other after the other...well...we're all in a puddle of goo and want to write faster so we can get MORE. Damned addicting if you ask me...**


	4. Chapter 4: Shows and Sex

**Disclaimer: ****We don't own Twilight.**

**AN: This was the original one-shot for the contest. For those of you that haven't read it, we hope you enjoy it! For those that have...we hope the first two chapters have offered up some insight into the minds of our characters...**

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Emmett POV

_Thank. Fuck._

I quickly found a parking space in the overly crowded, pricy strip joint Stilettos. It had been too long that I had gone out to have a good time and I figured I deserved the change of pace.

_Lonely. Being at my house equaled to being lonely._

I growled as I got out of the car, trying to stop my brain from thinking. Lately, I'd been feeling down, the weight of my bachelor status weighing heavily on my mind.

I walked in, looking the place over. I'd never been in this place, considering it was only about six months old. It looked like any other strip club I'd inhabited…dark, stank and smoky.

I tried to find a single table, wanting to get one a little bit up close to the stage. The ones I had my eyes on had a 'reserved' sign on them. I eyed one of the waitresses, a perky red head, and walked over to her.

"Excuse me, I was looking for a table but the ones I'm looking at have a reserved sign on them. Is there _any_ way that I can take one of them?"

I gave her my best dimpled smile, making sure my eyes stayed locked on her as I tried to dazzle her into giving in.

She blinked a few times, the shook her head a bit. I knew I had her.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"A table. The one I want has a reserved sign on it. Is there any way that I could use it?"

She smiled, her row of white teeth glowing in the black light. "Of course you can. Follow me, I'll seat you."

I followed as she shook her ass in my direction, begging me to pay attention. Once seated, I handed her a tip, seeing as I just conned her out of a table. I ordered my drink from her and leaned back, watching the act that was up now.

The girl up on stage was a blonde with a huge chest and high heels. Her top was already off as she was working the pole like her life depended on it. Hell, it probably did. Most of these people are trying to support a drug or alcohol habit.

I looked around the room and noticed that the majority of the guys sat in groups, probably with their friends or co-workers. _Lucky bastards…_

My waitress, who was coincidentally called Cherry, brought me back my scotch. I went back to watching the act up on stage as my mind wandered…like I knew it would.

_I should've invited Edward…or Jasper._ I hated being alone, but the other two guys were busy tonight. Edward was working at the hospital, _big surprise_, and Jasper had some sort of Civil War lecture he was attending since Alice had other plans.

Either way, it was just as well I suppose. Jasper was more of Edward's friend anyway. I met him through Edward and he turned out to be a pretty cool guy. Enough so, that when I found a great little starter house, he had agreed to move in and share the expenses until he and Alice tied the knot. Then I'd probably be alone again. Seemed like everyone was getting their happily ever after…everyone except me.

I thought of Edward and the perfect life he lived. Beautiful house, car, job and wife. The guy had it all…everything I'd ever wanted. And yet, the asshole spent all his free time at the hospital, working for the greater good.

Yeah, greater good my ass. He ought to be at home taking care of things there…

I sighed as I noticed the acts on the stage were switching out. I really hoped the next girl would be better than this last one. Blondes weren't exactly my thing…they always seemed a bit on the fluffy side. No backbone with them.

I heard Puddle of Mudd's _Control_ come on through the loud speakers. _Nice…this one at least has good taste in music._

The curtain parted and out stepped this beautiful goddess. She was dressed in black leather, from head to toe. A whip was in one gloved hand while the other one rested on her hip. Her face was covered in a leather mask that was sexy as hell. Already, my cock was twitching and she hadn't even done anything yet.

She swayed her hips as she walked forward, commanding attention right away. Her hair reached to her lower back as she stood front and center gyrating her hips and moving the whip up and down her body.

The goddess approached the pole on my side and wrapped her legs around it. I was entranced by her beautiful body. Covered in leather, she was the epitome of a dark dream come to life. My cock kept begging me for a release and I knew I'd give anything to find my release with this one.

She used the pole to help bend her over, giving me a perfect view of her ass and a slight view of her pussy lips. _What do you know…she waxes._ Using the pole to help her, she twirled around, her hair fanning out in waves around her.

Standing up, she got closer to the front, and this time, I was directly underneath her. She ran her hands up and down her body, punctuating each and every one of her curves. Running her hands back up, she grabbed the top of her outfit and pulled it apart, baring her beautiful perky breasts.

They weren't huge, like some of the strippers here, but damn…they were almost perfect. The music kept beating out in the loud speakers as she began to massage and move her tits around. She walked over my way, lifting her hands over her head to give everyone a perfect view when she all of a sudden put her arms down and seemingly covered her gorgeous breasts.

_What the hell?_

I tried to get up a bit, to get a better view of her, but she'd quickly rushed off to the other end of the stage, dancing and flashing the bastards on the other side.

Waiting out the dance, I tried to figure out how I was going to ask her out. Getting to her would be no problem. I found that with my charm and good looks, I could get whatever I wanted…whoever I wanted. This was the blessing that I was born with and I'd never regretted it.

It would help me this night to get my dark dream fantasy to go out on a date with me.

The song was running to its end and I was getting antsy. I knew she had to walk by me to get back to the curtain that she came out of and I was hoping I'd make some kind of eye contact with her…regardless of the mask.

Just as I predicted, she walked by me, strutting her hips and her legs, giving all the guys a show as she was retreating. She lifted her hands up into her hair and pulled it up, letting it fall down her back, slowly and sensually, exposing a mark…

_Hold up…_

_What the fuck?!_

_No way…no fuckin' way…_

_Is that?_

Oh man…someone was going to get an earful as soon as this act was over. And I was going to make sure I got to her first before anyone else did.

**

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Bella POV

I hurried off the stage not even bothering to retrieve my tips that littered the stage. Of all the rotten, fucked up luck … why was he here?

I said a silent prayer that he had not recognized me. I mean my face was covered and as soon as I realized exactly who it was sitting there, I had rushed to the other side of the stage.

That table he was sitting at was always reserved for the big spending, Friday night regulars. Why the hell Cherry had agreed to seat him there was beyond me. Like I said. Just my fucking rotten luck.

I quickly removed my mask, hoping I could slip out the back door. I had asked Nicky if she would handle the rest of my shift, feigning a migraine and she had readily agreed. All I wanted to do was get out of here and pretend that I had not ALMOST been caught stripping by my brother in law.

I was shoving things into my duffle bag when I heard the door close behind me.

"Nicky, thanks so much for covering my shift. I just need to…"

"Need to what, Bella?" I froze in my spot at the deep baritone voice booming through the room.

I spun forgetting I was still in my show outfit of little more than a g-string and stilettos. There before me was Emmett, Edward's brother, and he had fire blazing in his eyes.

"I…um…Emmett, it's not what it looks like."

"Really, because it looks to me like you are out there shaking you ass and tits for money. Jesus Christ, Bella… a stripper. I mean what the fuck? How could you? How could you do this to Edward?"

His words hit me like a ton of bricks and every bit of frustration and anger came bubbling to the surface. I walked up and poked him right in his massive chest.

"You listen to me you arrogant son of a bitch. You have no idea what you are talking about. Don't you dare try to comprehend something you don't understand!"

"What don't I understand? That my sweet, sister in law is basically a whore, selling her body for money to a bunch of strangers. Tell me exactly how hard is that to comprehend?"

My hand pulled back and I smacked him across the face. For a moment his features softened but then just as quickly they returned to his previous hardened expression.

He took a step back as his eyes raked up and down my body. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks as I lifted my hands to cover my breasts.

"Don't do that." He commanded.

I watched his eyes hood over with lust and for a moment I didn't cover myself. I felt a small tingle course through me that I was standing almost naked in front of another man. Or should I say another man that I actually knew.

The feeling was quickly replaced with shame as I recovered myself. I saw Emmett snap back to the present, the lustful look replaced with anger.

"Sorry, I guess I should be slipping you a twenty for that little peek."

"Bastard!" I spat. I turned on my heel and started shoving the rest of my things into the open duffel.

I felt a hand on my arm as he spun me so our chests were touching. He shrugged off his jacket and placed it around me and then reached down and grabbed my bag from the table.

"What are you doing?"

"You and I are going to take a little drive and discuss exactly why you are working in a strip club." He stated as he grabbed my arm pulling me towards the door.

"Please, Emmett … I just want to go home."

"Go home and do what? Tell your husband that you are taking your clothes off for money while he busts his ass at the hospital? No. You are going to explain to me why I shouldn't tell my baby brother what his wife is doing every night."

I knew I was fighting a lost cause as he led me to his small car. It was so different from what I would expect him to drive. So low to the ground that he seemed to just sort of sink into the seat.

I watched as the scenery flashed by the window. I was just totally fucked. There was no way Emmet was going to let this go without telling Edward. By the time he had stopped us down some deserted road, the tears were falling freely down my cheeks.

I laid my forehead against the cool glass, trying to control the sobs racking my body.

"Bella, Bella shhh…stop crying. I just want you to try and explain what you are doing in a place like that."

I turned to see his bright blue eyes, filled with concern staring at me. I inhaled a deep breath and blew it out, steadying myself.

"I got laid off from my nighttime care giving position. My previous patient passed away and having the least seniority I was the one placed on leave until something else comes up. The economy is tight. It is hard for people to afford someone like me to come in and help at night."

"But that still doesn't explain why you decided to work in a place like that. I mean it is just so… not you."

"Between our regular household bills and both of our student loans, I need to work in a place like Stilettos. I was making really great money as a home caregiver, the last thing I need is for Edward to be worried about money. I mean, he is working all the time as it is. If he thought we were having trouble paying our bills it would just make him feel like he needed to get another job."

Silently he shook his head and turned to gaze out the window. Even as the words fell from my lips, I struggled with the battle raging inside.

I did take the job to help pay our bills. The money was unbelievable, much more than what I had been making, and I was slowly paying off our massive amount of debt. However, it was something else that drew me to the dank and dark bar five nights a week.

For once in my life, I wasn't sweet, innocent Bella. I was hot and sexy and strangers gave me large amounts of cash to get a glimpse of my naked body. I could be everything I wasn't normally. Dancing afforded me the things that I was lacking at home…attention, desire, need. For just a few moments every night, all eyes were on me.

I felt another sob tear through my body. Terrible, disgusting, ashamed…all the emotions of my deeds hit me at once. What was wrong with me? Trying to justify my terrible actions.

"Bella, what can I do to help? Please tell me. I …I just can't stand to see you this way." I closed my eyes letting Emmett's words filter through my brain.

"Nothing Em. Just don't tell Edward okay? I'll find another job. Just please don't tell him." I knew I was begging, but I didn't care. How utterly despicable I was to be deceiving my husband, while he was out trying to make our lives better.

"I won't tell him. But you have to be honest with me. Is it just for the money? Because I can help you with that. Or is there something else you are not telling me?" Embarrassment flooded my face and I had to turn away from his gaze.

How could I tell him that I was slowly losing my husband? That the attention I got from a bunch of strange men was filling a desperate void of my existence. He would never understand. Edward was his brother…blood. No… he couldn't possibly understand. Best to just let him think that everything happening was due to financial problems.

I turned back in the seat and felt the cool air hit my exposed breasts through his gaping jacket. Slowly his hand reached through the opening, gently palming my flesh, while his fingers tugged at my nipples. A low moan escaped my lips as he leaned over slipping his tongue into my open mouth.

His lips were firm and insistent as he probed my mouth. Greedily I accepted him, savoring in his unique taste of sweet cinnamon. Slightly hot and tingly, such a difference to Edward's cool spearmint flavor.

_Edward…oh God…Edward. What am I doing?_

I pulled away, opening the car door in one swift motion, hurling myself into the cool night air. I instinctively grabbed my stomach, pulling the jacket tight against me as I stumbled to the front of the car. The tears blurred my vision as I willed myself to not become sick.

I was retreating into my own self-induced shell when I felt my chin being lifted. Those same bright blue eyes were staring deep into my watery brown ones.

"Bella, tell me…tell me the truth. What is happening?"

"I'm all alone Emmett. All the time…I'm alone. Even when Edward is home, he is sleeping or going over files, anything to further himself at work. And I feel so bad because I know he is doing it for me…for us. I am just so lonely."

I heard the deep intake of air, as he lowered his forehead to mine.

"I'm all alone too. And I'm so tired of it. Please, just for tonight…be with me." I felt his lips tentatively touch mine again as I just closed my eyes and accepted them. Right, wrong… I didn't care. I needed this...I needed him.

I felt the jacket slide from my body as he lifted me, laying me across the hood of his car. His lips were everywhere…my eyes, cheeks, neck. Hungrily he peppered my flesh with hot, wet kisses, finally taking my breast into his mouth.

I threw my head back against the hood, relishing his lips pulling against my pebbled nipples. Slowly he inched his way down, laving my entire torso with his tongue. I felt his fingers snake into my g-string and with one swift motion it was ripped in two.

Briefly he stopped at the apex of my pelvis, as I propped myself up on my elbows to see him gazing at me from between my legs.

"Emmett, you don't have to do that. I mean…uh…its okay. I know it is not exactly…proper."

He raised himself up slightly so that I could view his entire face.

"What do you mean…not proper? Are you trying to tell me that this is something you don't normally experience?"

"Well…once or twice, but it is not something…" My voice trailed off at the embarrassment of admitting that oral sex was not exactly something I was used to receiving.

"Fucking fool! Listen to me…tonight nothing matters but the two of us. I am going to make you feel things that you have only dreamed about. Tonight you are going to scream my name."

The next thing I felt was his hot tongue delving into my wet sex. He had both hands pressed against my thighs, holding my legs open as he lapped at the wetness seeping from between my lips.

"Umm…so fucking good Bella. You taste so good." He hummed as he lightly took my clit between his teeth and gently nibbled.

I felt my back arch off the car as the sensations flooded my body. My hands fisted into his dark curls, pushing his face deeper into my folds. The only sounds echoing through the night were my growing moans and the wet lapping sound of his tongue against my pussy.

My moans turned to grunts and screams as he added first one, then another and finally a third finger to my already drenched core.

"Oh god, Emmett. Please….I need…"

"What, Bella. Tell me what you need." He commanded as he unmercifully pumped his fingers in and out while flicking my overly sensitive nub with his talented tongue.

"I need…I need…" I stammered trying to get the words.

"Say it!" He roared

"I need to cum, Emmett. Please…" I whimpered.

His fingers curled towards my center as he pulled my clit into his mouth with one powerful tug. I let loose a loud scream into the night sky, shaking from the strength of my orgasm.

I watched as his head rose from between my legs, his lips and chin glistening with my juices and with one swift motion he pulled me farther down the hood, attacking my lips with his.

"See how good you taste? No one should pass up something as delicious as that."

I let out a small gasp at Emmett's subtle dig towards Edward. Wrong…this was so wrong and I knew my indecision was showing on my face.

"Bella, we can stop right here, right now. But know that I think Edward is a damn fool for not realizing what he has in you. Let me show you…let me love you…just for tonight. Please tell me what you want."

The look in his eyes, his hands on my body, melted all my resolve as I slid the rest of the way down the hood until my knees hit the hard pavement below. My fingers tugged at the buttons of his jeans as I lifted my head to stare into his downcast eyes.

"Let me show you what I want."

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Emmett POV

Never in a million years would I have ever, _ever_, envisioned what I saw before me.

Bella…on her knees, stroking my cock in her tiny hands.

_Goddammit…I'm going to hell…_

I felt her hot, warm mouth envelope my dick as she started to suck and lick me all around. I let my head fall back and groaned. It was the only sane thing I could do at the moment.

My hands found her beautiful dark hair and I fisted my hands in it, enjoying the feeling of her head bobbing up and down, rhythmically.

"Fuck, Bella. You are so damn good at this…"

She pulled back and looked up at me underneath her long, dark lashes. "Really? That's a shocker considering I don't do this as often as I'd like."

I looked down into her eyes. "What do you mean? Surely you and Edward…"

She shook her head, embarrassment filling her eyes. "Well hell, as long as you enjoy yourself…"

Bella smiled wickedly at me and said, "Oh, I do. And I'll let you feel how much I enjoy what I do." And with that, she put my cock back into her mouth, licking the pre-cum off of my tip.

Before I knew what I was doing, I had begun to shove my hips into her, fucking her sweet mouth with my length. Her back was up against the bumper, the car pretty much holding her up.

Realizing how uncomfortable she must be, I started to pull back when she made humming noises around me and grabbed my ass, shoving me back into her.

_She wanted me to fuck her mouth…_

That thought made me weak in the knees. I had no idea how in the world I thought Bella was this innocent naïve creature, but sure as hell, she was proving me wrong.

_And I love it._

I pumped into her harder and faster, her mouth opening up to take more of me into her mouth. My dick was covered with the wetness from her mouth, drenched in it, and it made the motion of pumping into her that much sweeter.

Her hand made its way to my balls as she gently stroked and caressed them. God, it felt so good to be stroked that way…if even just for one night.

I could feel myself on the verge of cuming all over her mouth, and I was at war with myself. Do I just let it end here, right now, with just oral sex? Or should we just go all the way?

The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to fuck Bella. I wanted her to see just how attractive she was, how much her body screamed out to me. She deserved to know that and well, shit, I was also tempted to know what she felt like as she came all over me…

But if we have sex…there's no going back. There was no going back either way, but having sex…yeah, that was crossing a line right there. She was married…married to…

_Go ahead and say it…she's married to your __**brother**__, Edward. Is this something that you could live with? What if he found out? What then?_

I pulled out of Bella's mouth at that point and brought her up to a standing position. My dick ached at the sudden release of her mouth but this had to be something that she wanted as well.

This wasn't only about me.

"Bella…God, I want you. Fuck, you don't know how bad I…"

"Yes, I do. I want you too. Please, Emmett. I need you…don't turn your back on me now."

I ran my hand through my hair out of frustration, something that Edward and I both did. Actually, we had a lot of things in common which was why we always got along so great. We were close, as close as two brothers, albeit adopted, could be. We'd always shared everything growing up.

_And now, you're about to share Bella, too. Even though she rightly belongs to him…_

"Fuckin' shit…"

Bella hung her head as she reached over for my jacket that was whisked off of her in our mad haze of lust. "I understand, Em. I really do. I'm so sorry for making you do something…"

I grabbed her arm and tossed her back onto the hood of my car. "What the hell are you talking about? Do you want me to fuck you senseless or not?"

Her eyes widened as she eyed my engorged cock, already dripping with my fluids, ready to take her at a moment's notice.

"Are you sure?" she breathed. I knew she was giving me an out if I wanted it.

_Oh yes…definitely going to hell._

I grabbed her hips roughly as I pushed myself into her and let out a loud moan.

_Holy hell…she's fuckin' tight._

I felt my eyes roll to the back of my head as I steadied myself inside of her. There was no way in hell I was going to cum early, like some horny, inexperienced teenager.

As I relaxed myself inside of her, a thought occurred to me. "Shit…I don't have on a condom."

Bella groaned, and not in a good way. "Fuck…I'm not on anything. You don't have one on you?"

I pumped in and out of her slowly, my dick reaping all the benefits of Bella's tight pussy. "No, I wasn't expecting to get laid tonight. I usually don't take home strange women from strip clubs."

"Well, I'm not a strange woman, and next time, you should be fuckin' prepared, asshole!"

Whoa. Horny Bella was a bitchy Bella if she didn't get her release. "Well, what the fuck should we do?"

My hips continued to pump into her of their own accord. "Ugh…don't stop…please, Em. I can't bare it…I mean, it's just one night, right? You'll be careful, I know you will. Just pull out."

I held onto her hips tighter, my other swollen head seemingly made the decision for me. "Hold on, Bella."

And with that, I fucked her like my life depended on it. The silent night air was filled with our joined moans, groans and pants. My balls were slapping up against her ass as her legs were up on my shoulders. I was bent over her, so close, I could gaze into her beautiful brown eyes.

_Her eyes are a beautiful brown, aren't they? And right now, she's staring into your blue ones when, in fact, she should be staring into some deep green ones instead…_

I took my anger out on Bella. Everything that I had been angry about…my loneliness, my fear of growing old alone, not having my own family, children and now, my anger over what I was doing to my brother…all of it, was taken out on my rough fucking of her.

And Bella, she was taking it all into her, like she knew what I was feeling. I suppose she did, considering she was reflecting the same look back at me.

She arched her back up and her tits grazed up against my chest. Her hands found my arms and she held on to them for dear life, her nails sliding down as I hammered into her. I felt the burning in my arms and knew it was going to leave marks, but hell if I cared at the moment.

_Anything to keep the memory of this night with me._

"Shit, Bella, I'm going to cum…cum with me."

Her mouth parted wider as her mewlings screamed out of her and became one word, "EMMETT!!"

I quickly pulled out of her and stepped back, taking my dick into my hand and jacked off, watching as my cum jetted out from me, landing in the dirt and grass around us.

I put my arm out on the hood of my car, trying to catch my breath and I could hear Bella doing the same. After a couple of moments, I picked up my pants and dressed myself, and then reached over for the jacket and put it on Bella, wanting her to be covered.

We both quietly made our way back to the car, knowing that this night was now over. What's done was done and although it should've never, ever happened, I couldn't regret it. For one night, I felt whole…complete.

_What the hell did that mean?_

Not wanting to consider anything else at the moment, I shut my mind out from everything. I leaned over and turned on the radio, just to get some sound going but I was sure neither one of us were paying any attention.

When I noticed that we were close to Stiletto's, I knew we had to say something to one another.

"Bella, I just want you to know that I really did enjoy our night together…even if it was just this one time. I hope you did to?"

_Shit…that didn't sound right. It was a bit awkward…_

She just smiled back up at me. "Yes, I did. And listen, Em. I know you hang out with Edward all the time and we do a lot of things together…but I don't want things to be weird with us, okay? Zero weirdness. I don't think I could take it if you didn't talk to me again."

I let out a breath of relief. Deep inside, I suppose I was thinking that she might not want to have anything to do with me. I was more than relieved to know that this was not the case.

"I agree with you, totally agree. Things will be back to normal in the morning. And don't worry, I won't tell Edward about this night job."

She smiled back at me gratefully. "Thank you so much, Em."

I leaned over, just intending to give her a hug goodbye, but instead, my lips found hers. I let my tongue dance in her mouth, soaking up all that was Bella, letting the taste linger in my mouth. I took her bottom lip and bit it, hard. I knew this would be the last time I tasted her…and I wanted to remember her.

I knew I bit too hard when I tasted a small amount of her blood. "Oh shit, I'm sorry…"

She giggled and pulled me in closer for one last kiss. As everything that was forbidden to me before became something within my grasp for this one night, I soaked in the last of my 'get out of jail free' card.

Bella pulled back and swiftly opened up the car door. She stepped out and grabbed her duffel and turned back to me, giving me one last wave. I said to her, "When are you're dancing days again?"

"Why?"

"I don't know…I thought I'd just stop by to visit you, if you don't mind?"

She thought for a split second and said, "No, I don't mind. I don't mind at all… I'll be here tomorrow."

And with that, she closed my door and made her way into the back door of the club, probably to change.

I rested my head on the headrest of my seat and thought, _Holy fuckin' hell…what have I done?_

**

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AT THE SAME TIME, ON THE OTHER SIDE OF TOWN…

Edward grabbed the woman's hips as she was bent down on all fours in front of him, his cock slamming into her, repeatedly…

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AN: So now we see what's going on, what's led up to this...now...wherever will they go from here?


	5. Chapter 5: Pain and Suffering

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN: Wow, you guys are really pissed at Edward. And it seems like EVERYONE would love to ease Emmett's loneliness. **

**All our thanks to everyone who has reviewed, put us on their alerts and favorites. Extra special love to Milalencar, cravingtwilght and Nethead97 ( whom may we add has Edward hiding under the bed)** **for their great reviews and PMs. **

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****Emmett POV**

"_Oh god, Emmett. Please…. I need…"_

"_What, Bella. Tell me what you need." I unmercifully pumped my fingers in and out while flicking her sensitive nub with my tongue._

"_I need…I need…" she stammered trying to get the words._

"_Say it!" I roared._

"_I need to cum, Emmett. Please…" she whimpered._

_My fingers curled towards her center as I pulled her clit into my mouth with one powerful tug. She let loose a loud scream into the night sky, shaking from the strength of her orgasm._

Oh man…

My head hurt so much. The light seems to be a bit bright in here too. God, I've got to remember to lay back on the booze…

I rubbed my hands over my face and my eyes as I tried to shake myself out of last night's dream. The alarm showed me that it was 8 am but it felt so much earlier. I laid still, thinking I'd better get up if I wanted to get rid of this hangover.

About fifteen more minutes went by when I was disturbed by some kind of noise coming from outside of my room. By the sound of it, the noise was coming from the den. It kind of sounded like Alice but that would be normal. Jasper and Alice always went at it like bunnies.

Deciding I was wide awake now, I made my way over to my shower and stepped into the cold water. Cold is good, cold is my friend, cold is…fuckin' cold.

I made my hand come back to me when I started stretching it out to the levers to change the temperature. _Hell no, McCarty, you need this. Keep the water on cold…you can do it._

After last nights amazing and almost real-like dream, I needed to calm down. Even now, my heart felt like it was about to leave my chest. I don't know what came over me last night but after I knocked out on beer, all I could think about…dream about, was Bella.

Bella…even now, her name sent chills up and down my body and it wasn't because of the cold either. The dream I had about her was so vivid and when I had awoken, I thanked the good Lord above that it wasn't true because really, what would I do then? Could I ever look at Edward in the eye again? It was bad enough I dreamt about her that way and I'd have to hide that fact from him.

But man…having Bella on the hood of my car had been what wet dreams were made of. Fuck…and when she went down on me and took my whole cock into her mouth? Yeah, those were going to be thoughts that I wouldn't be able to get out of my head any time soon.

By the time I knew it, I was palming my cock again, even in the middle of the cold as fuck shower. I couldn't help it and I knew that as disgusting as it made me feel, I couldn't stop. My hand stroked faster and faster as I noticed the swell of my head becoming engorged. I pictured Bella kneeling her beautiful body down in front of me as she took me into her mouth, begging me to cum down her throat.

Because she wanted it.

Because she needed it…needed me.

In one loud grunt, I spilled my cum all over my shower floor as I struggled to regain control. It wasn't as strong as the one I remembered in my dreams but it was good nonetheless.

I finished myself off and quickly got out. I didn't have any specific plans for this Saturday and I was hoping that maybe Jasper and Alice might want to do something together. I didn't think I could face Edward this soon. Not after having fantasized about his wife in the shower.

While I was rubbing the towel over my upper back and down my shoulders, I felt a burning pain. _What the hell?_

I couldn't see behind me so I stood in front of my mirror after wrapping the towel around my middle. Not seeing anything unusual in my front side, I turned around.

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!"

I knew I was loud, but hell, I couldn't contain my voice, my thoughts, my feelings anymore. There, staring back in the mirror, were long, dark scratch marks that were just made.

"Oh my God…"

Not a dream. Not a dream. Last night…Bella…stripper…car…blowjob…fucking…

Not a dream.

I had to sit down on the toilet to regain my senses. Everything that happened, everything that I thought wasn't real suddenly…was.

What the fuck have I done? What did I do? To Edward? Bella?

I realized my hands were trembling as I ran them over my face to try to calm down. Hell, my whole body was trembling. I'd screwed my brother over. My hard working, always been there for me brother. We'd seen each other through everything. We knew everything about each other and there isn't anything I wouldn't do for him.

And now?

I was nothing but a motherfuckin' backstabbing son of a bitch and I knew it. I also knew what would happen if he ever found out what I did.

I'd be cast out. He wouldn't want me anywhere near him anymore. And that would be one less person in my life.

And Bella…hell, Edward and Bella had been together since the beginning of time. They've always been together. In fact, there was no Edward unless Bella was there and vice-versa. And what did I do? In just one night, I'd screwed them over.

I got up and walked out into my room knowing that my life as I had known it was now over. I would never be the same Emmett again to either one of them. And that thought made me want to cry.

I quickly dressed and looked myself over in the mirror one more time. No, not the same. In the light of a new day, I realized, too late, that what Bella and I did last night was wrong. Very wrong.

I couldn't lose Edward though. He was my life. I am what I am today because of my family. He was my brother and even though we didn't share the same blood, we'd always been brothers, no matter what…and I couldn't lose him.

With renewed fervor, I realized that I wasn't going to tell Edward anything. Bella and I had agreed that last night would be the only night it would happen. That was that. Edward didn't need to know of his wife's infidelity and my backstab against him. This would be our secret.

I took one last breath and walked out my door hoping like hell Jasper and Alice wanted to go out somewhere today – away from Edward and Bella. I didn't think I could be near either of them without becoming twitchy and the last thing I needed was to be questioned by Edward.

As soon as I opened my door, I knew something was wrong. I could hear Jasper and Alice, sure, but were they…fighting?

"Alice, sweetheart, please talk to me. I know you said you were working late last night, but when I called your office to ask you if you were okay, the woman who answered the phone said she hadn't seen you at all and you weren't in your office. Alice, baby, where were you?"

I saw her huff as she started pacing the den that they were in. With a glare, she turned on Jasper and said, "What the hell is the matter with you, Jasper, don't you trust me? You think I'm out with some guy?"

Jasper ran a hand through his blonde hair as he let out one long strangled breath. "You know what? I don't know…I just don't fuckin' know anymore Alice!! You say you're in one place, but you're not. You don't answer my phone calls anymore and you're being extremely secretive around me. I mean, come on, what the fuck am I supposed to think?!"

I shifted uneasily where I stood because even though I knew Alice wasn't with me and I didn't do anything with her, I also knew how easily it could be done. How easy it could be for Alice to have one night of pleasure…

The nausea was coming back into the pit of my stomach. I turned away praying to God above that Alice was being faithful. Life was fucked up enough with the shit that I just caused last night.

Realizing that there would be no hanging out with Jasper and Alice today, I settled down with the thought that I would have to do something alone again. Just as I was about to gather my things to leave, the doorbell rings.

_Great. Who the fuck can that be to join the party?_

I got to the door and hesitated. God above would truly hate me if it was…

I opened the door.

"Emmett, thank God your up and ready. I've really got to get out and let out some steam, you know? I've had an awful night and my morning hasn't been that much better. Can I come in?"

All I could do was stare. I left Edward standing on my porch step as he waited for my answer. I knew I had bastard burned on my forehead for all to see. I waited for him to start yelling. Or punching.

"Em? You gonna let me in?"

All I could do was move back as he walked in. I knew he was going to start in any minute now. Except all I could hear was Alice and Jasper, their voices escalated as their argument had also.

"What's going on? Is that Jasper and Alice?"

I nodded as Edward led the way to the den. There in front of us, was Alice up in Jasper's face as they both glared at each other, pissed off being too kind a word to use.

"I told you to trust me. I'm not fucking around on you and if I said I was somewhere, then I was. Okay?"

Edward stepped in. "Um…guys, everything okay? You seem a little tense. Alice…"

She snapped her head around, her eyes not going any kind toward Edward. "Back off, Edward. This is my fight, not yours. Please **do not** butt in, you hear?"

With that, he stepped back and stayed quiet. Jasper sighed again and brought his hands up to Alice's face to speak to her.

"Alice, it's not okay. If you're lying to me, about anything, then that means it's something you don't want to tell me and that concerns me. We're going to be married soon and you need to learn to trust me…to let me in. Confide in me, angel. Even if it means you want someone else."

Edward seemed transfixed on the couple in front of us, and as much as I didn't want to be alone with Edward, I knew Jasper and Alice needed to be alone. Plus, I wanted Edward to get things between us out of the way.

I grabbed his arm and practically dragged him out of the room and out the front door. I hope that he wouldn't feel the need to make a big scene out in public, but that's never stopped him before. He had quite a temper.

As we walked out and walked toward the cars, I kept glancing over at him. It didn't seem like he slept much last night and I could very well understand why…I just hoped he'd make me suffer physically. It's the least I deserve.

"Hey Em, can we go in your car?"

I stopped walking completely.

"My c…car? What's wrong with yours?"

"Nothing, I just wanted a change of pace."

"Mine's not working properly right now…can we take yours? I wouldn't want mine to leave us stranded."

He shrugged as we made our way to his Volvo. I settled myself in and waited for the inevitable. After a couple of silent moments, he said, "Emmett, I've got to talk to you. It's about Bella."

This was it…the beginning of the end of my life.

* * *

**Edward POV (The night before, continued)**

I saw her smirk at me as she walked past. She bumped into me and I felt her hand dip into my pocket for just a moment before she continued on her way. I made it to the end of the hall and turned right before I stuck my hand in my pocket pulling out a small slip of paper.

It read; _Meet me in the on-call room. Five minutes. I need you, Edward. Now. _

I didn't consider it adultery. Not really, this was…helping me to be a better man. For Bella. God help me.

I waited the five minutes and then made my way into the on-call room. She was already undressed. "Edward…"

I smirked. "What are you doing?"

"Isn't it obvious?" She asked teasingly, shaking her ass at me.

"A…uh…well, do you think…?"

She stood and walked to me. I glared down at her, but she grabbed me by the back of the neck. "Please, Edward?" She asked softly, her eyes begging. "I need this, I need…you. Now."

Those eyes, that pleading…when she never begs for anything in her life usually…it was my undoing. I let out a moan as I pulled her to me, feasting on her mouth. She moaned and I threw her roughly to the carpeted floor. I didn't need to see her face, her eyes, I couldn't even call her by her name, not when we were like this. She was just a faceless pussy for me to put all my aggressions into. And I was a willing cock to get her off. No strings, no…complications, just us and raw fucking.

I unfastened the drawstring of my pants and lowered them. Then I knelt behind her and grabbed her hips as she was bent down on all fours in front of me. I ran my hardened length against her folds and she shivered. "Ed…" She whimpered.

"Shut up." I growled. "Or you won't get this. You need it, don't you?" I teased her entrance. I knew she needed it. She needed me to get her off. No one else could satisfy her needs like me. She had told me once, in confidence, when we had been together before this, before Bella…

"Yes!" She screamed and I slammed my cock into her.

"Fuck!" She howled, balling her fists into the carpet. I ground into her, thrusting repeatedly…trying desperately to imagine I was anywhere else besides doing this awful deed, but I couldn't have stopped if there were a gun to my head.

I felt her pussy clench around me and that was all it took for me to cry out, bending over her, pounding rapidly as I came.

"Holy shit," She muttered as I pulled out and stepped away from her. I pulled my scrub pants back up and said, "I have to check on a patient." And with that, I stepped back outside into the hall where I could breathe, where the scent of her Channel No. 5 wasn't fogging my senses.

* * *

My guilt was in full force by the time I'd finished my rounds and I was to the point of nausea as I walked out to my car. _You have to admit this. You have to tell her…_I had stopped at the twenty four hour Wal-Mart, purchased flowers, written an apology note and everything before I realized…flowers would _not _help this. And there just aren't cards that say, "Sorry, babe, I cheated on you." It doesn't work that way.

I tossed them into the outside garbage can. _I have to tell her. _I glanced at my watch. Two AM. _She's asleep. Don't wake her up just to assuage your own guilt, Edward. You aren't going to do this again. It was a one, well, okay, few time thing. It's better you just keep this to yourself for now. No good could come from telling her this. _

I was exhausted. And my secrets were the only reason I felt like shit. Erin died tonight, just a few hours ago. That little girl lost her life while I was fucking…I blew out a breath as I slipped inside. _Let it go, Edward. You've all but finished your peds rotation. Now you can concentrate on what you really want to do. You needed the outlet. Besides, it wasn't like she_ minded_ you fucking her…_

I walked upstairs and into the bedroom. Bella was sleeping peacefully, curled in a ball, all the covers around her. She looked like an angel. _And you know you're just the demon she married. _

I took a shower, terrified Bella would smell _her _perfume on me and then eased into the bed. Bella mumbled and turned over, burrowing into the covers further. I sighed. I'm a horrible person. I'm a terrible human being. I don't know how much longer I can hold out at the lies…

I tossed and turned all night. When the sun finally rose, I knew I had to get the hell out of there. Maybe Emmett hadn't eaten breakfast?

_Who are you kidding, Edward? He got a piece of pussy last night. _It was Saturday morning, after all…_you know he won't be up…_

I couldn't talk to Jasper. The secrets Ali and I had…if I let it slip…he'd murder me. Then she'd bring me back to life just to kill me again. No, Jasper was definitely out. I had to talk to my brother.

I dressed quickly, ran my hands through my hair and ran out of the house to the car. The whole ride over I wondered…_what am I going to say? Hey, Emmett, guess what? I'm fucking around on Bella! Just go ahead and kill me know, kay? _I shook my head. No, that wouldn't work…maybe it would just come to me?

I arrived at his and Jasper's place and knocked on the door. To my surprise, Emmett answered. "Emmett, thank God your up and ready. I've really got to get out and let out some steam, you know? I've had an awful night and my morning hasn't been that much better. Can I come in?"

He stared at me. "Em? You gonna let me in?" I asked finally.

He moved aside and I walked in. Just then, I heard a sound of arguing. I told Emmett he shouldn't listen to the TV that loud…but wait, that voice…"What's going on? Is that Jasper and Alice?"

He nodded and I led the way to the den. There in front of us, was Alice up in Jasper's face as they both glared at each other. It was evident that both were more than a little…perturbed at each other.

"I told you to trust me. I'm not fucking around on you and if I said I was somewhere, then I was. Okay?" Alice shouted.

I resisted the urge to vomit and stepped in. She didn't need to get this upset. It really wasn't good for someone that small to… "Um…guys, everything okay? You seem a little tense. Alice…"

She snapped her head around, her eyes hardening even further. "Back off, Edward. This is my fight, not yours. Please _do not_ butt in, you hear?"

I felt sure I paled. _Not my fight? How could this be NOT my fight? _I stepped back and stayed quiet though, fearing for my balls at this point.

Jasper sighed again and brought his hands up to Alice's face to speak to her. "Alice, it's not okay. If you're lying to me, about anything, then that means it's something you don't want to tell me and that concerns me. We're going to be married soon and you need to learn to trust me…to let me in. Confide in me, angel. Even if it means you want someone else."

I couldn't stop watching them. Would she tell him? Would this be the end of it? Would…would my whole world change once more? I knew I had quite a few transgressions against me, but Bella would never forgive me this...not with Alice.

Suddenly I felt Em grab my arm and drag me out of the room and out the front door.

I blinked in the pale, watery sunlight that filtered down through the clouds. What? Right…don't think about it. Deal with it when it comes. Just…let Jasper and Alice handle it the way they need to. Maybe…maybe this will blow over, right? I snorted internally. Even a toddler wouldn't believe that shit.

I didn't think I should be driving in this state. Not as confused, as worried, as heartbroken as I was right now. "Hey Em, can we go in your car?"

He stopped and I bumped into him. "My c…car? What's wrong with yours?"

"Nothing, I just wanted a change of pace." I said quickly.

"Mine's not working properly right now…can we take yours? I wouldn't want mine to leave us stranded."

Great. I gave him a shrug and we made our way to the Volvo. We sat down and I thought a moment. I can't lie anymore, I have to do this. I have to tell _someone._"Emmett, I've got to talk to you. It's about Bella." I held in the cringe. I could only hope he'd make me suffer physically. It's the least I deserve.

His eyes grew wide and I said, "Uh…um…how about breakfast? My treat?"

He nodded and I took him to one of our favorite greasy spoons. It wasn't much of a place, but the "Landmark Diner" had some great food. We ordered our usuals, me, Eggs Benedict with a side of bacon, and Emmett, a ham, egg, and cheese sandwich, _with _mayo, and home fries. We talked about piddly shit, but I could tell he wasn't really into the conversation. Neither was I, for that matter. Oddly enough, he wasn't even really eating. _I wonder what's bothering him. _"You know, I'm not really that hungry, are you?"

He shook his head 'no'. "Come on, then. Let's go to the sauna, okay? We'll get relaxed and I'll tell you what's going on."

He didn't respond as I started the car and headed toward our gym. We didn't speak as we went into the building, nor did we speak as we changed clothes. But I noticed when Emmett took his shirt off that he had deep gouges down his arms and some on his back.

I'd never been marked by a woman before. Of course, my _actual _experience with women was only two. Bella and…I blew out a breath. Bella. She was an angel, a princess. She deserved to be treated as such, not as some sort of…outlet for my stress in the form of sex. It would be beneath her to let me fuck her. She didn't deserve that. I should be ashamed of myself for even thinking of it.

So, I did what I normally do, I bullshitted and said, "Damn, Emmett. That must have been one hellcat you managed to land last night."

He dropped his wallet. "What?"

I grinned, though, I didn't feel like it. "Those marks all over your back and arms."

"Shit. She got my back too? Damn it."

"Hey, it's fine. I wish…" I trailed off.

"Wish what, Edward?" He asked me.

"Nothing."

"No, not 'nothing'. What is it?"

I shrugged. "I've just…I've not…"

"Been properly fucked before?" He asked, his eyebrow raised.

"Emmett! That is my wife!"

He opened his mouth to say something and shut it with an audible 'snap'. Then, to my surprise, he blushed, just slightly. So, again, I smiled. "She must have been an excellent lay, Emmett, to have you blushing like that."

He scowled and ignored me as he went into the sauna room. I couldn't quite help the chuckle. We sat in the slightly hazy room and I sighed.

"What is it, Edward? What's going on with you?" He asked quietly.

I could say the same, but because I'm a selfish bastard, I said, "I lost someone last night. A little girl. She…died on my watch."

His hand reached out to clasp my arm. "Ed, dude, I'm so sorry, was she…?"

"We were expecting it." I said as my eyes stung from tears. "She was terminal. Cancer. But still, she was so young…" I was sniffing now.

"I think Alice is having an affair." Emmett blurted out.

"What?!" I asked. Shit. Alice! What the fuck have you done?!

He blew out a breath. "The way they were arguing…and Jasper's right. Even _I've _noticed that and you _know _how unobservant I am."

Yes, he was right. He wasn't very observant. I'd tell Alice this had to stop. We shouldn't…she shouldn't be lying to Jasper. They were getting married…eventually, and this was no way for her to be treating him.

_But look at how you're treating Bella, _I thought._ You're an evil son of a bitch for fucking someone else behind her back. _A tear rolled down my face.

"Are you alright?" Emmett asked me softly.

I blew out a breath. "No, I'm not. I'm stressed, Em. I'm worried about work, about our student loans, about…" I ran my fingers through my hair. "And Bella has no fucking idea of any of it."

"Come again?" He asked.

"My sweet Bella is clueless, Em. She has no idea. When Dad cut me off until I could 'find my path' that left us with a shitload of bills. I am trying my damnedest, working all shifts I can, learning as much as possible so I can provide for her, for us, for the family we may someday have…" I did start sobbing then. It wasn't something I liked to think about, my infertility. Having Leukemia at such a young age, the radiation, the chemotherapy…I was completely cured now, but the odds of me ever fathering a child were nil. Bella knew that coming into our relationship, I never wanted to put that burden off on someone else, but she just lifted her chin and informed me of how many children in the world needed good families and she wouldn't mind adopting ten of them. I had cried then too. But now…

To my surprise, Emmett's jaw hardened. "What?" I asked.

"You always think of yourself, don't you?" He said, his fists clenching.

"Of course not!" I said quickly. "I always think of Bella! Do you know how many shifts I pull just so she can keep her cute little 'baby sitter' job?"

"You self absorbed, ignorant, jackass!" Emmett roared. "Bella has burdens too! She probably thought her life would be easier by now instead of harder! You don't help matters!"

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Em? Bella is kept, that's all that matters. She's kept content in our lifestyle and that's the way I want it to be."

"You are so fucking blind." Emmett said. "You just have no idea about anyone around you, anything going on that isn't under your control."

"You just need to calm your ass down, Em. Seriously." I shook my head. Then, I heard my pager beep. I looked at it. I didn't like to take it into the sauna, but since I knew that I might be needed…I picked it up and grimaced at the number. Alice. Shit. "I've got to go, Em. Can you get a ride…?"

He let out a snort. "Fine, that's just fucking _fine, _Edward. It's typical. Go off and save the world while everything else just falls to shit around you…"

I stopped and looked at him. "For the last time, Em, what the FUCK are you talking about?"

He stood too. "If you're too blind to fucking SEE what's going on around you then maybe it _is_ best you're left in the fucking DARK." And with that, he stormed out of the sauna room.

I blinked and stepped out into the cool locker room. He was heading for the showers. I grabbed my clothes and slipped into them. I threw on some deodorant and cologne, I didn't have time for a shower. I could take one later.

"Em…" I started. I had seen which shower he went into.

"Just leave me the fuck alone, Edward. Sometimes more people than you have shit going on in their lives."

"Do…do you want to talk about it?"

"Not while you're standing outside my damned shower stall you fucking pervert. Go, your pager went off. Go save the world."

I sighed. "I'm…sorry, Em." I paused and then added, "Look, I don't know what's up with you, but I do care. About you. About Bella. You two are the most important people in the world to me, outside of Mom and Dad. I hope you know that." He didn't say anything, so I added, "And you'd better put some antiseptic on those scratches. I'm serious. I don't know what kind of wild animal you had in the sack last night, but it must have been great."

I could barely hear him say, "You have no idea."


	6. Chapter 6:The Trouble with Talking

**Disclaimer: Don't own it. NOT Stephenie Meyer. Cuz, me thinks she wouldn't have done THIS with her characters. **

**AN: We have a thread...we have a thread *does the happy dance***

**cravingtwilight was awesome enough to go start us a thread on twilighted, so come on over and join the fun. We will be posting teasers and chatting about what will happen. If you think these first few chapters are wild - you ain't seen nothing yet. SERIOUSLY!!! We come up with new and twisted crap EVERY day. We pass ideas back and forth all day long.**

** If we have jobs by the time this is over - it will be a miracle.**

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* * *

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Bella POV

My foot searched under the covers in hopes of finding Edward. When it had moved across the length of the bed, never coming in contact with flesh, I finally rolled over.

Part of me was sad and a bit confused as to why the bed was empty, although the other part was more than a little relieved. I wasn't quite sure I would be able to hold in the barrage of emotions I was feeling.

I had driven home in a daze last night. My body felt alive and charged in a way that it had not been since the beginning of my marriage, although my heart was breaking inside that I had taken that step. I was a horrible, horrible person.

I loved my husband, yet I had done the most despicable, terrible act possible. As soon as I had pulled up in the driveway, I threw open the door, vomiting in the rosebushes fronting our house.

I hurried inside and threw my duffle bag in the bottom of the closet. I immediately stripped off my clothes and turned the water on in the shower as hot as I could stand. Stepping in I let the water pour down my body as I dry heaved into my hands.

I grabbed the loofah from the hook and started scrubbing my skin raw. There was no way to explain what I was feeling. It was as if I was hoping to wash away my infidelity with the dirty water down the drain. I crumpled to the floor of the shower eventually crawling out on to the bathroom mat when the water turned to cold to tolerate.

I had no idea how long I lay curled up on the bathroom floor but I knew I needed to get up before Edward came home questioning what was wrong with me.

As if on autopilot, I put on a pair of flannel pajama pants and a cami and climbed underneath the covers. I curled up in a fetal position, pulling the covers around me in a tight cocoon and waited for the sound of Edward's car in the driveway.

As soon as I heard the key turn in the knob, I tried to regulate my breathing, closing my eyes to feign sleep. Eventually, I heard the shower cut on and contemplated whether I should just get up, go in and tell him everything.

He loved me right? But could he forgive me? Would he ever be able to look at me with that same fire in his eyes, if he knew what I had done?

_You fucked his brother, stupid._ Do you think it is like telling him you washed an ink pen with his favorite shirt? Besides, it was one time. Emmett gave you an outlet. No one ever has to know.

The door to the bathroom opened and Edward slipped into the bed, not bothering to even put his pajamas on. The smell of his shampoo mixed with his own unique scent almost bringing me to tears again. I had a thought of rolling over, and just slipping him in my mouth. Seeing if I could break some of the barriers that we had created, but it just seemed like too many shades of wrong to seduce my husband after I had received the fucking of my life from his brother. So instead, I curled myself into a tighter knot and fell into a restless sleep.

I pulled myself from the bed and shuffled into the kitchen to flip on the coffee pot. I still had no idea where Edward had gone to. Usually he would sleep in on Saturday mornings, while I did some light housework and then we would head out for a late breakfast and a trip to the bookstore.

I picked up the phone to call and see where he might have gone but couldn't will myself to dial the number. I still had an overwhelming amount of guilt going on in my head and thought that perhaps a few minutes to clear my head and infuse some coffee into my system, might be a better choice.

I made my way back to the bathroom and opened the hamper. Grabbing the clothes from inside, I gathered them into my arms and headed to the laundry room.

I flipped open the lid to the washer and started putting pieces inside. My hands picked up the blue scrubs he had worn to the hospital last night. Just as I was about to throw them into the wash, a fragrant smell caught my attention. I raised the shirt to my nose and inhaled deeply. Perfume.

The scent caught me off guard for just a moment. Edward came home from time to time with lingering traces of perfume on his clothes. I knew he not only had to care for patients physically but emotionally as well. More than once he had been the one to break the news of a lost patient to a family member as they cried on his shoulder. Not to mention he worked closely with several female interns. So the fact that I could smell perfume on his clothing was not disturbing to me.

What was curious was the particular smell. I racked my brain, as I took another whiff of the shirt. Chanel No. 5. Of course, I should know that smell anywhere. Alice had worn that particular fragrance since we met in school. No wonder it smelled so familiar. I threw the shirt in the wash and slammed the lid closed.

I made up the bed and headed to the kitchen to pour myself a cup of coffee. I poured the last of the cream into my cup and opened the garbage can to dispose of the carton. Full, of course. I pulled the bag from the can, tying it up as I headed out the back door to put it in the outside garbage cans.

I lifted the lid, only to find a beautiful bouquet of flowers shoved in with the trash. Why would there be flowers in the trash? I walked back into the kitchen, stopping at the sink to wash my hands.

That was when I noticed the hastily scribbled note on the back of an envelope sitting on the table, written in Edward's hand writing.

_Gone to Em's. _

_Oh god! _He knows, he knows. Those three little words terrified me. Why else would he be gone to Emmett's so early on a Saturday morning? Oh and the flowers. Flowers for me…trash. I grasped the counter forcing my head between my knees as I tried to catch my breath.

I have to get over there now. Whatever happened, I can fix this, we can fix this.

I slipped on my sneakers, and pulled my hair into a sloppy bun. I grabbed my keys, running out the door to my car. I all but slammed it in reverse, and pealed out of the driveway.

This is what you get you stupid bitch. You have ruined your life, Emmett's life and Edward's. You promised to love him, honor him, and the first test, you failed.

I pulled into Emmett's driveway, noticing that only his car and Jasper's truck were there. I knocked on the front door, trying to control my breathing for fear of passing out right there on the doorstep.

Jasper opened the door, taking in my disheveled appearance with a smirk. "Ummm…morning, Bells. What are you doing here…in your jammies?"

I blushed furiously. I didn't even realize that I had left the house in my pajamas.

"I...umm…I thought Edward was over here."

"He was, but him and Em went out for breakfast. Is something wrong? I hate to say it Bells but you don't look so good."

My attempt at controlling my breathing was starting to falter. Every possible scenario of what Edward was saying or possibly doing to Emmett crossed through my mind. Although he was no where near as brawny as Emmett, Edward was more than capable of holding his own in a fight.

"Can I have a glass of water?" I croaked.

"Sure, come on in." Jasper held the door open as I stumbled to the couch. As hard as I was trying, I couldn't control the tremors in my legs and the nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach. I was wondering if I could even make it to the bathroom when Jasper reappeared with a glass in his hand.

"Here ya go, darlin'."

Gingerly I sipped the water as I closed my eyes, willing the tears not to fall.

"Bella, can I ask you something? Something that I hope that although it is personal you would tell me the truth."

The question caught me off guard. The only thing I could think of was that he must know what happened between me and Em.

"I guess."

He took a deep breath and exhaled, running his fingers through his blond hair.

"Do you think Alice is cheating on me? I mean, you two are so close that if she was going to confide in anyone, it would be you."

I choked on my water, feeling the slight burn in my nose as it threatened to expel itself. "Why would you think something like that, Jasper?"

"Lots of little things lately. She doesn't answer her phone sometimes. She will tell me she is going to be one place and then be another. Just like right now, we had a huge fight and she stormed out of here saying she was going to see you, but here you are."

My mind swirled with the revelations. Alice and I had not been spending nearly as much time together as usual, but I still felt like she would tell me if something was going on between her and Jasper. I mean, we had been best friends forever.

_Would you?_

The two little words crossed my mind. Would I tell her about what happened with Emmett? Probably not. Still there was no reason for Jasper to worry about something that I didn't know anything about.

"She hasn't told me anything, Jasper, except how crazy she is about you. I think you may be worrying about nothing. Alice loves you."

"Love doesn't always factor in where unfaithfulness is concerned."

I felt like I had taken a blow to the stomach.

"Can I ask you something, Jasper…just hypothetically? If you found out Alice _had_ cheated on you, could you forgive her? "

I waited as he pondered the question, finally leveling his gaze to mine. "I think so. I love her enough to want to work through any problems, if she wanted it as well. It would probably be hard…to forgive, but I would because I love her."

"I don't think you have anything to worry about, Jasper. You know Alice is a little flighty. I am sure you are worrying about nothing. So what did you two have a fight about?"

"She said she was working late, but the other lady in the office said she hadn't seen her. Then when I questioned where she was last night, she bit my head off. The next thing I knew she was storming out of here, saying she was going to see you." He let out a sigh, flopping against the back of the couch. "I don't want to lose her, Bella."

"Jazz, I probably just missed her. She may have already let herself in and started polishing off my quart of rocky road. I guess I should head on home and see if she is there."

Suddenly, he jumped from the couch. "Oh shit! I got so flustered when I saw you at the door, I forgot I was supposed to go pick up Emmett at the gym."

"I thought he was with Edward?"

"He was. They decided to go to the gym and then Em called saying Edward had got a page from the hospital and wanted to know if would I come pick him up."

I watched as he walked to the table and grabbed his keys. I stood up feeling slightly better after the brief talk with Japer. "Why don't you let me go and get Emmett and you head down to Francesca's and pick out a present for Alice. They had a new shipment of dresses that came in last week and it is all she has talked about since then."

"I don't know? Me pick out Alice's clothes? If she wasn't pissed at me already, she may be if I get her the wrong thing…or size for that matter."

I let out a little chuckle. He was not far off the mark when it came to Alice and her love of clothing. "Just ask one of the girls behind the counter. Alice shops there so much they all know her tastes and size. And don't worry, Jazz. I am sure Alice just has a lot on her mind. Everything will be right as rain before you know it."

I gave him a slight hug, before I walked out the door. I was about to climb into my car when something hit me and I knew that after our conversation, Jasper may be the best one to ask.

"Mmm, Jasper, one thing. If something had happened with Alice, would you want to know or not?" He gave me a perplexed look, and I knew he was trying to feel me out, trying to see if I actually did know something. I gave him a reassuring smile hoping to put his mind at ease. "_Just…_ out of curiosity.

"Yes…no…I don't know. I think if it was just a one time thing… then no, I wouldn't. It is a lot easier to forgive than forget. You know what I mean?"

I nodded my head, knowing exactly how he felt. I gave him a slight wave as I pulled out of the driveway.

This was a perfect opportunity to clear the air with Emmett. Obviously, nothing had happened between him and Edward, or he wouldn't have headed to the hospital.

_I didn't think_.

It seemed like he practically lived there nowadays. I knew how important his career was to him. And that everyone expected such great things from him considering his family's history. Something must have happened at the hospital because he was hardly ever on call Saturday mornings, especially coming off the late shift. Who knew? I could hardly keep up with his schedule anymore.

I thought about what I wanted to say to Emmett. Trying to rehearse it out loud, so I didn't sound like too much of an idiot.

How much I cared for him. How I knew last night was a combination of so much stress and hurt and that it was a mistake…

No, not a mistake, that sounds awful.

It was a mistake, albeit the most mind blowing mistake you have had in months.

I hit the steering wheel with my head in frustration.

_Fuck, everything sounds fucking ignorant coming out of my mouth._

I realized I was at a red light and the guy beside me was gawking at the intense conversation I seemed to be having with myself. I shot him a smile and then flipped him off as the light changed.

I took a deep breath and tried rehearsing the lines one more time.

"Emmett. I want you to know that last night meant so much to me; you mean so much to me. But I love Edward, you know that."

"I know we already discussed how it was a one time, never happen again, thing. So I think it would be best if you don't come to the club and see me. I'll do my best to find another job. I want my marriage to work. I need it to work and I'll do anything to see that it happens."

I gave myself an internal pat on the back. That sounded decent. And Emmett was…well just Emmett. We could get past this and be the same old Bellaboo, Emmybear, brother-sister in law again, right?

I pulled up at the curb, noticing him before he did me.

Tight, white shirt with the sleeves cut off, basketball shorts, sunglasses, tanned arms and he was sucking on some sort of lollipop that brought visions to my head of where those lips had been last night.

He finally noticed me and shot me his trademark smile, dimples and all.

The fucking speech went out the window.

**

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Emmett POV

Damn him.

Damn him and his…his…stupidness. That's all I could really think to call it. I mean, I knew my brother was dense, and self absorbed, but I had no idea it had gotten this bad. How the hell does Bella deal with it?

Our conversation didn't go nearly as bad as I had thought it would. Obviously, he didn't know what had happened between me and his wife, or else I wouldn't be standing here on this curb waiting for Jasper to pick me up. But for him to think that Bella was unaware of the events going on in their home was insulting.

Degrading.

Did he think she had no worries? No cares? Nothing weighing her down? How the hell did they get married?! It's like he doesn't even know her. Hell, I know her better than he does…

_In more ways than one…_

God, I just wish my brother would open his eyes. I love him, I really do. My actions may be far from my words, but I really want him and Bella to communicate a bit better. It would help their marriage in the long run.

But Edward…well, Edward's always been an, "I can fix it" kind of guy. Which is why he became a doctor. But how can you fix what you don't know is broken? How can I make him see that his marriage is ending…quicker than when it first began?

I'm surprised I didn't alert him with my outburst. I knew standing up for Bella was a dumb move, but he angered me. If he could just see her, as she truly is…broken and frail…

I rubbed my hand over my face, going nowhere fast. These feelings I had for Bella had to stop now. My body still wanted her…god how I wanted her. And I cared for her…probably more than a brother in law should for his sister in law, but what could I do? Was it love? No…yes…maybe. I don't know. All I know was that I've seen her grow and mature into the woman that she is now and I want that.

I want what Edward has…what he's neglecting.

And if he didn't want it…I did.

Oh man…shoot me now. I'm the worst brother in the history of the world. I'm slowly killing Edward…and he doesn't even realize it.

No, my love for Edward exceeds anything I feel for Bella. It does. I know it does. So, next time I see her, I'm going to put a stop to this whole mess. It's going to be over between us. It was one time, no more.

Yes, that's what I'll do.

Of course, these things are easier said that done.

A car pulled up right along side me as I turned around and noticed it was Bella. Before I could stop myself, I smiled in her direction, my big ass grin spreading like a sickness across my face.

_Well, no time like the present to have that conversation._

I opened the car door and stepped in, throwing my duffel in the back of her car.

"Bella! Fancy meeting you here. I had called Jazz…"

She smiled and replied, "Yes, but I was over at the house and I told him I'd go over and pick you up myself. I thought maybe we could…talk?"

I nodded and told her we could park someplace and just sit in her car and talk. I didn't have any interest in going someplace by ourselves…people might start to gossip.

I glanced over at her and besides noticing her beauty, I also saw she was still in her pajamas. "Uh…Bella? I know you've never been that much into style before, but your clothes…"

She giggled. "I know, I know. It's just…well, I rushed out of the house this morning."

"To my house? Why?"

She sighed and continued on. "I went to your house to find Edward. You see, he left really early this morning and I didn't get a chance to speak to him. I was still feeling guilty about last night," she blushed, "and I guess I wanted to relieve my burden by speaking to him. That didn't work out and long story short, I found flowers in the trashcan and a note saying that he'd gone to your house. Now I ask you, why buy me perfectly good flowers and just toss them?"

Hmm…she did have a point. I would've freaked too. There is no telling why Edward would've bought flowers in the first place, or why he threw them away. The talk I had with Edward had shown nothing in the way that he was sorry toward Bella for anything. According to him, he was the only one stressed out.

"I don't know what to tell you. He seemed fine when I spoke to him earlier."

"I meant to ask you about that. You look like you're in one piece. Does that mean…"

I put my hand over hers and said, "He doesn't know anything. And I really think we should keep it that way. Edward is stressed out as it is…probably about all the wrong things, but he is trying. He…he loves you."

She nodded but didn't say anything else. We parked soon enough and as soon as the car engine died, I turned to her.

"Bella…"

"Emmett…"

We both laughed nervously, trying to figure out where to go from here. I decided to let her go first.

"Well, you see, I have a question for you. I know it may sound stupid and I'm probably jumping the gun, but I need your opinion."

"Alright, shoot."

"Okay. See, I was washing laundry this morning and I came across the scrubs Edward wore yesterday. I was just about to put them in when I smelled perfume."

Perfume?

"And that's normal, usually, because he comes into contact with a lot of people, often having to hug them and become a shoulder that they can cry on. But…it was the scent of this perfume that really got me thinking."

"What was it?"

"Chanel No. 5. I know it doesn't make sense to you, but that smell is the same one that Alice uses and it just made me wonder if maybe Alice and Edward aren't…you know…"

_Edward and Alice? _No…no way. No fucking way. Alice wouldn't do that to Jasper. She loves him too much.

_Doesn't Bella love Edward just as much?_

That's different. Edward and Bella have problems.

_Apparently so does Alice and Japer._

I allowed myself to think about this a bit more. That would explain Edward's curious reaction to watching Jasper and Alice argue. And he did look a bit surprised when I asked him if he thought Alice was cheating on Jasper…

But…no. No, she's not. At least, not with Edward. I would've seen it, sensed it. Hell, if anyone can tell when someone is cheating on someone else, it would be me and Edward is definitely not cheating on Bella.

_Erin…_

That's right!!

I smiled as I turned to face Bella. "I know what it is. He told me about it this morning. I shouldn't tell you this because it's really his place to say, but I want to put your mind at ease. He told me he lost a patient yesterday. A little girl who had cancer and lost her battle. I'm sure he had to be there to comfort her parents as she passed. Knowing Edward, he was probably holding her hand as she passed."

The immediate relief I saw on her face was well worth telling her about what happened to Edward. "You're right. You're right, I know you are. I think it's just my conscience plaguing me…"

I nodded in understanding. I sighed as I realized it was my turn to speak. "Look Bella…last night…last night was something special that happened between us. Albeit, it was wrong on so many levels, but it was special to me, just the same."

"Me too, Em."

"But I think that maybe we should just quit while we're ahead, you know? I love you and Edward too much to put you guys in any more pain and stress. If it just happened once, then I think we can move past this…what do you say, Bellaboo?"

She laughed as I called her by my nickname for her. "I totally agree with you, Emmybear. One time, that's all."

"Alright, now about that job of yours…"

"I know, I know. Look, I'll find some other way to earn extra cash but…"

"No, that's not what I was going to say. If you want to work there, then do it. If it makes you feel free, feel different, then go ahead. After talking to Edward and realizing how dense in the head he is, I honestly wonder how you can stand him."

"I love him. And all his stupid faults."

"Even if it costs you your own happiness?"

She looked pensive as she shrugged. That was a conversation for another day, I suppose.

"When do you work again?"

"Tonight. Edward works and Saturday's are usually big money-making nights…"

I nodded and whispered, "I won't go."

"That's…that's good."

"It's not that I don't want to see you…but I'm afraid that if I do see you…it's going to be hard not to…you know."

"What? Fuck me?"

My cock jumped. "Yeah, something like that."

She laughed. "I understand. My feelings aren't hurt or anything…I just want what's best, you know?"

"Yeah, me too."

I reached up and ran my hand through my hair when she got up and leaned over her seat toward me.

"What happened to your arms?"

Before I could think, she leaned over and her soft fingertips brushed at my scratches. But when she did, her top slid over and I got a good look at her tits…doing nothing at all to help my resolve.

"Oh my god! Did I do that? Em, I'm so sorry…"

Fisting my hands so that I wouldn't reach over to grab her, I replied, "No, don't be. I kinda like them."

She giggled and pulled back, stopping inches from my face. I couldn't help but stare into her beautiful brown eyes and I felt all my resolve melting away.

Her eyes darted down to my mouth and my eyes darted down to hers, both of us getting closer to one another. God, I was so close to her, I could practically taste her…

Suddenly, out of no where, the sound of a cell phone pierced the silence…hers.

"Shit. Sorry, I…um…Let me just…"

She fumbled for her phone and quickly answered it. "Hello? Edward!! Hi…um…how are you?" I saw her slap the palm of her hand to her forehead.

_Edward. Fuck. Dude, come on, wake up. That's your brother! Or have you forgotten?_

"Dinner? Tonight? But I thought you had to work?"

I saw her go through a series of head nods and mmm-hmm's when she finally said, "That sounds really great, Edward. Of course I'll be ready. Okay, see you tonight. I love you too."

She flipped the phone closed and we sat in silence. This was getting too hard.

"Bella, you should take me home."

She quickly nodded and started the car and we traveled back in silence. Neither one of us knew what to say so we stayed quiet. That was probably best.

We reached my home and I quickly opened up the door, reaching back for my duffel.

"Thanks for the lift, Bella."

"Anytime, Em."

I just about walked away when I turned back. "I really hope you have a great time tonight with Edward. You two deserve it."

And without waiting for a response, I shut the door and walked off.

I entered my house and went directly to my room, willing the pain I felt in my heart to go away. Oddly enough, the pain wasn't because of what I'd done to Edward but something else entirely.

I ached because I heard Bella tell him she loved him. And I knew she meant it. I just wish that she could've said those words to me. I wanted that. I wanted Bella's love.

I was in deeper shit than I thought.

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**AN2: Don't forget the thread. The link is on our profile. **

**There is also one for the freakin' fantastic siggie that Miztrezboo made for us. Who knows, if we give him enough love maybe Em will make an appearance with that lollipop - YUMMY!!!**


	7. Chapter 7: Broken Dreams

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN: Happy, Happy Birthday to mischief-maker1. Today is her birthday, so we expect lots and lots of lovely presents in the forms of reviews to flood our inbox.**

**Man, do you readers have some double standards. At least you acknowledge it... and we feel the same. Something about Bella and Em that just gives us the warm fuzzies, while Edward...well, Edward is going to be short an appendage if he is not careful. **

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Edward POV

I headed out of the gym and made my way to my car, dialing her number. "Alice?"

"Edward, please, I need to talk to you." She was crying.

Great. Just what I needed. As if my own fucked up problems weren't enough. But she was my friend, so, what could I say? "I just left the gym. Meet in our usual spot?" I asked.

"Please. I don't know what to do anymore."

I sighed and punched the steering wheel. "I'll be right there." I snapped the phone shut and sighed. When did my life get so fucked up?

Twenty minutes later, I walked into the hospital and found _her _waiting for me in the stairwell. Tears were pouring down her beautiful face. Which was unusual. Normally, she wasn't this emotional. "Tell me about it. Tell me what happened." I demanded.

She shook her head and grabbed me, pulling me into a kiss. "No talking. Not now. I need you, Edward."

"You always need me," I said with a smirk.

Her face changed, and I felt bad. "Shhh, it's okay. Just…"

"Shut up and fuck me." She growled.

My cock twitched and all thoughts of telling her this had to end, all thoughts of Bella…went right out of my head as I pushed her up against the wall. "How do you want it?" I asked her with a growl of my own.

"You know how I want it." She replied.

"Down on the stairs." I commanded. I pushed her down onto the steps on her knees, just remembering to throw my jacket down to pad her, and lifted her skirt. Her bare pussy and ass stared back at me. God, she looked delicious. I took one slow swipe with my tongue up and back down. I licked my lips. "Someone went to the spa."

"It makes me feel better." She said with a shrug as she turned and pulled me out of my pants. She reached into her bra for a condom and my eyebrow went up.

"You always keep those there?"

She smirked. "You never know when you'll need one."

I groaned as she slipped it on me before turning back around and assuming her position. She gripped the stair above her and I pushed into her.

"Fuck! Edward!"

"Yes…you like that, don't you…you like it when I fuck you." I was pumping fast now, only concentrating on the warmth surrounding my cock.

"Yes!" She cried, cumming at once. I was no where near finished. I moved in her harder, faster, with quick, sharp strokes and long, drawn out strokes until she cried out once more.

My hand dove for her clit, determined to get another out of her and she let out a long moan as I felt her pussy clench me for the last time, taking my orgasm with it.

I stood on shaky legs and moved to pull the condom off of me, wadding it up in a tissue I found in my pocket. She turned and flipped her skirt back down as she handed me my jacket. "Thank you. I feel much better now." And just like that, she left, the smell of her perfume and sex the only remnants of what had just happened.

After that, and feeling like shit, to boot, I went to look at the surgery board. Today was Saturday, so that meant a lot of traumas in the emergency department. However, we also had a few surgeries scheduled. I saw that my five o'clock surgery had been canceled. Good. Maybe I could…I dialed Bella's number. I needed to see her, to talk to her. I felt horrible for what I was doing…I needed to make this right.

She picked up on the third ring. "Hello?"

"Hi, love." I told her. She sounded strange. I knew that all these hours were working on our marriage, but she had no place to be upset about it. After all, I was doing it for her.

"Edward!! Hi…um…how are you?"

"I'm quite fine, thank you. I was just wondering if you'd like to accompany me for dinner? I'd love to spend some time with you…"

"Dinner? Tonight? But I thought you had to work?"

Poor thing. I was beginning to neglect her. My shame had set in full force. "My surgery rescheduled. I thought we could meet at that little Indian place just down from the hospital? I'm sorry I can't come home and get you, but you know how it is…"

She 'hmmmed' in acknowledgement and I continued. "Anyway, why don't you go get you something new to wear? Maybe visit the spa? Have some fun today. Would you like that?"

She 'hmmmed' again and I smiled. "Let's say we meet at seven? Will you be able to be ready by then?"

"That sounds really great, Edward. Of course I'll be ready. Okay, see you tonight."

"Wonderful. I love you, Bella. So much."

"I love you too." I heard her click off and I shut the phone. I smiled. Yes, things were going to work themselves out. They had to.

* * *

The rest of the day flew by easily enough, and before I knew it, it was six forty-five. I was just changing into my polo and blue jeans when my pager sounded. I groaned and went to the phone, dialing the extension for the emergency department. "Dr. Cullen, calling in."

"Oh, good. I'd hoped we'd caught you before you left," The nurse said. "There was a Greyhound bus accident out on the interstate; there are a lot of casualties, as it caused a ten car pileup. All hands need to be on deck."

"But…" I started.

"I see that you're slated to be leaving shortly. Do you think there is any way you could stay, Dr. Cullen?"

I blew out a breath. The extra hours would be terrific on my paycheck. But…Bella…fuck. She'll just have to get over it. We need this money. I need to stay here, to do this. I can help. I shouldn't be out having fun with Bella when I could be saving someone's life. "Okay. I just need to change."

"Thank you, Dr. Cullen, really. Be ready in five, the first bus should be pulling in then."

I groaned and smacked my forehead against my locker. Fuck…Bella's going to kill me. I quickly changed back into my scrubs and dialed her number. It went to voicemail. Shit. "Bella, love, something came up. I can't make it. I'm so sorry. I love you." I snapped the phone shut, flipping it into my locker.

I rushed down to the ambulance bay just as the first one arrived. The paramedics piled out. "Okay, gentlemen, what have we got?"

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Bella POV

I had no idea how I made it the few miles to my house after dropping Emmett off. The logical side of my brain was trying to concentrate on the fact that my husband had called and asked me out on a date. A date! Something planned for no reason besides he wanted to be with me.

Unfortunately, the other side of my brain, which for all intents and purposes, I am going to assume controls lust, was focused on one thing and one thing only.

_Emmett._

I had no idea that being in such close proximity would bring all those emotions and feelings to the front. Not to mention he looked like sex on legs, with those damn muscles showing, and those dark curls, not to mention that mouth, reeking of cherry lollipop…

_Shit!_

I banged my head against the steering wheel as my breath caught in my throat. I had almost kissed him. If Edward had not called at that exact moment there is no doubt that I would have done something utterly foolish.

I hit my head against the wheel again. Too bad there was nothing to cure the case of the stupids. I could sure as hell use an industrial size bottle of it.

As I let myself in the front door, I tried to push all thoughts of Emmett from my brain. Tonight should be a fresh start for me and Edward. He was obviously trying considering he was taking off from work. That in itself was an anomaly.

First thing on the agenda was that I needed to call in to Stilettos'. Luckily, I was blessed to work at the one club that was owned by a female. Barbara made sure we were treated as family and she always made sure that anyone who worked for her knew they came before the bottom line. Besides, I was part time. She had been kind enough to let me work my schedule around Edward's hospital shifts and there was never a shortage of girls who wanted to work the Saturday night crowd. You could make enough in one night to compensate for a whole week of dancing.

As soon as that was done, I headed into the bedroom to find something to wear. I wanted it to be special, sexy. Restlessly, I pawed through my closet. Edward had said to go pick out something new, but I hated to spend the money. I inwardly debated, finally deciding that the hundred dollar tip I had squirreled away three nights ago was better spent on looking good for my husband than the new Rachel Ray cook wear set I had been eyeing on QVC. Teflon, nonstick sauce pan or possible wild monkey sex with Edward…no contest.

I grabbed the cordless phone and punched in the number of the one person I needed for this little endeavor. I waited patiently as the rings flowed into voicemail.

"Hey this is Alice; you know what to do…" Beep.

I hung the phone up without leaving a message. I had been surprised to pull up and not see her yellow car in the driveway. Whenever she and Jasper were on the outs, she usually hightailed it to our house, binging on ice cream and Lifetime movies until she had it all cried out.

Lately though she had been so distant. We still met for lunch once or twice a week but it was if she was somewhere else when we talked. I had tried asking her what was wrong, but all she gave was a curt 'nothing' and a quick change to another subject. Maybe if all went well with Edward tonight we could get together soon and I might try and convince her to open up to me. But first I needed to fix my own shit.

I stripped out of my pajamas and threw on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. There was so much that needed to be done and I had a short amount of time to get it done.

* * *

I glanced at the clock on the bedside table. Six- thirty. Almost time. My body hummed in anticipation at the thoughts of what the night might bring.

I took another look at myself in the bedroom mirror. How lucky was I that I had found this black wrap dress shoved in the bargain rack. It fit perfectly, held closed by just one long tie at the side. The front dipped down just low enough to show some cleavage and underneath…well, the money I saved on the dress had been enough to splurge on a not so ladylike bra and panty set.

One positive thing about dancing was I had learned to handle myself in shoes. I adjusted the ankle strap of the four inch heels and then glanced around the room.

Tonight would be perfect. I just knew it.

I left the lights on dim as I grabbed my purse and keys and headed out the front door.

* * *

My fingers drummed the table as I checked my watch for the hundredth time. I wasn't surprised when I beat Edward to the restaurant. It was no shock when he was thirty minutes late. But it was approaching an hour and the waiter was beginning to get a bit antsy when I refused to order anything until the rest of my party arrived.

I dug in my purse, only to discover that I had left my cell phone at home. I asked the waiter to bring me an order of Samosas while I went to the restroom. He was obviously pleased at the prospect of not having his table tied up by non-buying patrons as he gave me a tart smile and directed me towards the lavatories.

I searched for a payphone to no avail, finally asking the hostess if I might borrow the house phone for a quick local call.

She handed me a cordless and stepped a few paces back to afford me a bit of privacy, her brightly colored sari catching my attention.

I punched in the direct number to the ER and waited for the desk to pick up.

"Emergency Room, this is Mary."

"Hello, Mary. This is Bella Cullen. Could you check and see if Doctor Edward Cullen has left for the night?"

"One moment."

I stood and nervously chewed on my bottom lip. What if he had been in an accident?

Good Lord, he drove like a bat out of hell most of the time. I heard the phone click off hold as the same voice came on the line.

"No, Mrs. Cullen. He has not logged out for the evening. Would you like me to page him for you?"

Fire bubbled in my veins.

"No…no, thank you."

I hit the end call button and handed the phone back to the hostess. I wasn't sure if I felt like crying from my hurt or my rage. I should have known better than to get my hopes up.

The hostess placed a hand on my shoulder, concern flashing in her eyes at my obvious distress. "Ma'am can I get you something?"

"You can have my waiter bring a bottle of wine. It looks like I will be eating alone tonight."

An hour later I was stuffed full of Puri and Chicken Makhni. Each bite I took made me want to go gouge his eyes out. Granted, I knew this was the life of a surgeon's wife. But it was every single time. He never went anywhere without that fucking pager of his… even when he wasn't on call.

Well tonight…tonight is the straw that broke the camel's back. Feeling slightly brave from the two glasses of wine, I paid the check and headed out the door to the one place I hardly ever ventured. The hospital.

Now, Edward had never told me outright that he didn't want me at the hospital. On occasion I would bring him lunch or dinner, but for the most part he preferred I stayed away. He liked to keep a professional atmosphere or some stupid shit like that, was what he always told me.

Well tough titty said the kitty, because that is exactly where I was headed. I was pissed and overly full of Indian food, not to mention bubbling with unattended sexual tension from what I thought was going to have happened after dinner. So yeah, his work would do just fine for a confrontation.

I whipped my car into the parking space marked C. Cullen. I knew for a fact my father in law was not working tonight, so fuck if I wasn't going to use it.

My confidence was in full force until I hit the sliding doors of the ER. The medicinal smell hit my nose and I wondered for a minute if I would be able to hold down my dinner. I gave my name to the triage nurse and she buzzed open the set of doors that led back out of the waiting room.

It was at this moment that the strap on my pointy heel decided to snap. With a loud curse I bent down to try and fix it, effectively losing my balance and falling head long into a nurse, sending the stack of papers in her hands flying.

"Oh God. I am so sorry. I am such a klutz." I muttered as I started scooping the papers into stacks, handing them over to the exasperated woman in front of me.

Her violet eyes glared at me, finally melting as she let out a long sigh. "It's okay. It has been a shitty night anyway." She grumbled as she grabbed at the mess around her.

Something about her hit a familiar cord. Just as I was about to delve in deeper, my eyes caught a sight at the end of the hallway.

_Mother Fucker!! _

There sitting on the nurse's station was a long legged, strawberry blonde. Leaning back against the desk between her legs was my husband, obviously enjoying the neck message she was administering from the way his head was hung over towards the floor. The blonde tilted her head back and laughed while my stomach heaved.

I shoved the wad of papers in my hand towards the woman and scrambled to my feet.

"Sorry…really, so sorry." I mumbled as I hobbled down the hall.

She muttered some sort of reply which I didn't comprehend. The only thing cohesive in my mind was making it to the end of the hall where I could murder my husband.

His head was still pointing towards the floor, so he didn't see me stop in front of him. Just the low hums of pleasure he was admitting filling the air.

"Neck hurt… love?" I purred.

Immediately his head popped up, so fast that the blonde fell slightly backwards, grabbing on to his shirt for leverage. "Bella, what are you doing here?"

"Well, I was supposed to have dinner with my husband, but seeing as how he never showed, I decided I would come and see what had happened to him. I guess I got my answer."

I turned on my one good heel as he grabbed my arm, spinning me back towards him.

"I called your cell to tell you I couldn't make it, but it went straight to voice mail." He shot back like that was an answer that effectively fixed the entire situation.

"I left it at home." I spat.

"Figures."

"And what does that mean?" I asked. My voice was starting to quiver with unshed tears and anger.

"Nothing. You are just flighty some times."

"Excuse me, you son of a bitch. I am sorry that in my anticipation about our date I left my phone at home. If I had known it was going to get canceled due to Miss Magic Fingers here, I would have made sure to grab it!"

"What the fuck, Bella? Tanya was just massaging my neck. There was a Greyhound bus accident and I have been in surgery for hours. I'm sorry I missed our dinner, but I think saving lives is a bit more important."

The heat flared through my body as I glared back and forth between him and the woman behind him who seemed as though she were in a state of shock.

"Of course, of course Edward. But let me ask you something. Could you or could you not have left? There seems to be quite a few doctors around here. Was it that you had to stay or you wanted to?"

"Technically, I was off for the night…" I shot him a look that stopped him mid-sentence.

"Exactly, what I thought." I snapped. _Fuck this, fuck him_. I turned to leave again and he caught my arm, pulling me off balance.

"You don't have a fucking clue do you? Everything I do is for us. I work all the goddamn time for you - to give you the life you deserve. You have no idea the amount of pressure I am under here. So yeah, I could have left if I wanted to but I didn't - I stayed. Stayed because they needed me here. I made a difference."

His eyes turned cold as he raked his hands through his hair.

"I need you too." I whispered. I shot the bitch behind him a stare and started down the hall. I was half way to the door when I heard his footsteps behind me.

"Wait, Bella. Will you just wait a minute?"

I turned and put my hand out to stop him from getting any closer. "I have waited long enough, Edward. Do me a favor; find somewhere else to stay tonight. I need some time away from you to cool down."

"And where exactly am I supposed to go?"

"I don't know and right now I really don't care. Call Jasper, sleep here, ask your masseuse down there. She looked like she wouldn't mind sharing her bed."

"Bella…don't, you know it's not…" He took a step forwards as I backed away.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?" I turned and headed towards the exit, forcing the tears to stay inside until I was out of hearing range.

Once outside, I slipped to the curb, removing my other shoe. The tears racked my body until they were replaced by dry heaves. Part of me wanted to go back inside and tell him how sorry I was, that I loved him and I knew how hard he worked. I knew part of my anger was misplaced on him because of the guilt I was feeling from the previous night. It was though I was trying to intentionally push him so I could justify my actions.

_I was a bitch._

I pulled myself to my feet, realizing that the whole night had been a huge misunderstanding. He was a doctor for Christ's sake. Things like this were going to happen.

I took a compact from my purse to make myself presentable before I headed back inside. Just as I was about to go in, a couple of employees, still in their scrubs, came through the doors.

"Mmmm, mmmm, mmmm, did you see how hot Dr. Cullen looked tonight? How I would love to wrap my legs around that stud and hold on tight." The brunette said to her tall companion.

"Me too, me too. Too bad he is married."

I inwardly smiled. Yes, he was married to me. I tugged on my dress, ready to go back in and show him exactly how glad I was about that fact.

The brunette giggled as they headed the other direction. "Like that matters. I heard, and don't you say a word, that he has been slipping _someone_ his thermometer, if you know what I mean."

The blonde let out a gasp. "No way! And if you and I are thinking about the same person and its true then his marriage is done for. You know she destroyed Dr. Rodriguez's and then dropped him when his wife got everything."

I stood frozen as they headed towards the parking lot. My worst fear, pretty much confirmed.

_Well, you cheated too_. I thought to myself.

It's different. It was Emmett. Someone you care about, whom you needed and also needed you in return.

I rushed to my car, the sobs returning and blindly made it home.

As I looked at the darkened house, I knew I couldn't go inside. I didn't want to be around anything that would remind me of Edward. I put it in reverse and headed down the street.

I thought about calling Alice and then remembered I had left my phone at home, which was what had started this whole shit fest to begin with.

_Maybe she was at Jasper's? _

I turned the car around and headed that way.

I stopped across the street, noticing that the lights were off. Jasper's truck was gone but Emmett's car was still there. I turned off the ignition, wondering if it would be too uncomfortable for us both if I showed up on his doorstep.

Not a good idea, especially with what almost happened this morning.

Quickly, I put the car in drive and headed for the one place that I could lose myself. Nothing like loud music, free booze and strangers tossing you money to take your cares away.

* * *

**AN2: So this chapter, get you in a tizzy? Could our Edward be double dipping in someone else's pot o' honey? Come over to the thread and let us know what you think. Also, we are on twitter too...if you want to tweet about the story. The links are on our profile. **


	8. Chapter 8: Can't Stay Away

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN: Just a little note to make things clear. We do not condone cheating. It is just part of our story. A big part right now...but as the story progresses...we hope everyone realizes that everything happens for a reason.**

**That's all. Our PSA for the day...cheating is bad!!**

* * *

**Emmett POV**

"Emmett…hey buddy, you okay?"

I heard Jasper calling my name and talking to me, but I couldn't really register what he was saying. I was dwelling on my talk with Bella and all the other shit in my life that wasn't going as I thought it should've.

"Yeah, sorry, just have a lot on my mind right now."

Jasper came and sat down next to me, leaning back against the sofa and closing his eyes. "Yeah well, that makes two of us."

Oh yeah…he and Ali weren't really on the best of terms at the moment. I turned to look at my friend and realized that he looked bad. His eyes were dark from lack of sleep and he wasn't in his normally cheerful mood.

The thing I'd always loved about Jasper was his way of dealing with people. He had this really calming effect on everyone around him. You really couldn't get mad at him for anything because he was so likeable. Well, apparently Alice could, but she's always been the exception to a lot of things.

"Dude, I'm really sorry about you and Alice. Any idea what's up with her?"

He shook his head. "No, none at all. I don't know what to make of it. First, I think she's cheating, then I think, no, Alice would NEVER do that to me. She loves me like I love her…but Em…is love ever really enough to stop someone from cheating on someone else?"

_No, _I thought, _Love isn't enough…_

Instead of contributing to his mournful thoughts, I kept quiet. I had no idea what to tell him. I'm sure if Jasper ever found out what I've done with Bella, he'd hate me in an instant. You just don't do shit like that to friends…especially family.

I sighed and leaned back against the sofa just like Jasper and closed my eyes. Bella's face floated around in my brain and all I could think about was that almost kiss we shared. She was so close and the look in her eyes told me that she wanted me too.

And then Edward had to call. My brother always had the worse timing in the world, I swear…

Hold up. That's wrong. I should be thanking Edward for having the worst timing in the world because then, I'd have shared a kiss with Bella…who smelled of strawberries…who laughed and smiled like an angel…who was a wild cat in bed…who had a mouth like a vacu…

Shit, there I go again. I popped my lids open as I heard Jasper speaking again.

"You know, I don't even think she went to Bella's house. She told me she was going to go see Bella, but then Bella came here. She tried to cover for Alice, saying that she must've just missed her on the way over to our house, but I know that if I called her, she'd tell me that Alice wasn't at her house at all…and I don't want to call her because I don't think I could handle my heart breaking even more at the thought of yet another lie."

My heart really went out to him. Unlike Edward, Jasper treated Alice the way she should be treated. He loved her with all his heart and always made sure that he took care of her, by meeting _her_ needs, not what he _thought_ her needs should be. Two different men both going through problems with their women, except Jasper was aware of his problems…Edward was not.

I slapped my hands on my knees and got up, turning on Jasper and grabbing his arms, yanking him up too.

"Come on, roomie. We're going out tonight."

"What? No, I don't think so. I really don't feel like going out…"

"Okay, so what? You want to stay here in this house moping about Alice all day long? Lock yourself up in your room like a girl and cry over something that you can do nothing about? Come on man, you need to get out for a bit, let your mind air out."

He looked at me carefully before he started chuckling. "Sometimes, I really wonder what goes through that brain of yours, Em. I really do."

"Believe me Jazz, you don't want to know."

We walked out and got into his truck since I was still too much of a dipshit to get back into my own car. We got to the theatre and as we settled down to watch our action flick movie, I realized that it was nice to spend some time with Jasper again. It'd been a while since we'd done anything together and I was glad. This had been a great idea on my behalf. Go figure.

Two and a half hours later found us back outside the theatre and into his truck.

"What do we do now?"

Jasper thought as he started the engine. "I don't know. I'm not ready to go home though, is that okay with you?"

"Sure, I've got nothing to do at the moment. Let's just go for a drive."

The drive found us outside the laser tag place. We hadn't been there since Edward's birthday, two years ago. "What do you say?" Jasper asked.

I smiled in spite of myself. "Bring it, bitch."

Three rounds of laser tag later, I was dragging ass. "Fuck," I muttered as we left out into the darkening evening. "Alice must be wearing off on you. You're like the damned energizer bunny."

Jasper's face fell and I felt like shit for mentioning her name. "Say…uh, you hungry?" I asked.

He nodded and we jumped back into his truck.

We ended up going to one of our favorite steak houses and after a nice porterhouse and a big assed baked potato, I was quite full and semi-content. I must have been more tired than I realized because next thing I knew, I had knocked out. I woke up what felt like five minutes later from a bump in the road. My eyes opened groggily as I stretched out in his cab and looked around me.

_Hmm…this looks vaguely familiar…_

And then I saw why.

Up ahead was the Stiletto's strip club sign blazing in all its glory with the lights up against the dark sky. And we were headed that way.

"Uh…Jazz man…where we going?"

"Oh, well, as I was driving, I found myself along this new area that they built not too long ago. I was thinking that maybe we could stop by this new strip club up ahead. I haven't been there yet, have you?"

I couldn't even answer him. I felt the popcorn, nachos and coke I had devoured during the movie, not to mention the big motherfucking steak and potato from dinner churning around in my stomach. I had to stop him from going there. I had to protect Bella from anyone seeing her like that…

Wait a second…

I wanted to slap my forehead and yell at myself for getting worked up over nothing. Bella was on her date with Edward tonight, being wined and dined like she deserved to be. I sat back in my seat, relieved that I could just be a guy and ogle at all the women who danced in front of us, not worrying if one of them would be Bella.

We were almost to the club when it happened.

Jasper's phone rang.

"Hello? Hey Edward, what's up?"

Jasper was quiet on our end as he was listening to Edward talk.

"Yeah, of course you can stay at our house. The couch is always available to you, you know this. Can I ask what happened?"

A series of mmhhmm's and oh's and yeah's came out of his mouth, never once letting me in on what was going on. I was getting a bit frantic if their date had not gone well and he was staying over tonight…but surely, Bella would just stay home tonight…wouldn't she?

"Dude, tough shit that's going on right now. The only one lucky enough to not go through any chick problems is Emmett and we don't have to tell him how lucky he is…"

_Oh god…if only they knew._

I waited for Jasper to hang up and as soon as he did, I bombarded him with my questions.

"What happened? Is everything fine? Why does he have to stay at the house? What happened with Bella?"

"Calm down, Em. You're brother is fine. Apparently, there was a misunderstanding with their date that happened because Bella didn't check her phone messages. Edward had to cancel because there was a really bad bus accident downtown and the hospital needed all the help they could get. He had called to cancel, Bella didn't get the message since she didn't take her phone and she thought she got stood up. She confronted him at the hospital, a big fight ensued and next thing you know, Bella's telling him he can't come home tonight."

Wow…I had no idea what to think. My first reaction was to call Bella and make sure everything was okay…that she was okay. But I also knew that wasn't my place. It wasn't right for me to try to take over the role as comforter…even if I wanted to.

My next thought was the club. Would she come over here? Wouldn't she just go home and do what Alice would do? Curl up with a bucket of ice cream and drown her sorrows away with Ben and Jerry's? Something told me that as much as I wish she would do that, the Bella I knew didn't sulk around at home…she kept herself busy instead.

And that's another thing I loved and admired her for.

We pulled up into the parking lot and I quickly started searching the parking lot for her car. I was hoping beyond hope that her car wasn't around.

It was futile.

There it was, parked close to the back door of the club. We were too far away to get a good look at it, but I thought I saw something moving…

_Holy Shit!!_

She'd just gotten there. Bella was coming out of her car to go into the club. I had to distract Jasper…and quick! I was contemplating the effectiveness of making some vomiting noises when I heard his phone go off again.

_Great, who the hell could that be?_

It was Alice. Jasper sounded like his life line was on the phone talking to him at that moment. While he still sounded pissed, he also sounded relieved.

I looked back toward the club door while Jasper was distracted on the phone to get a good look at my Bella.

Whoa…_My Bella?!_

Where the hell did THAT come from?

Nevertheless, it was there. The word MINE popped up in my mind when I saw her and I felt a smile form onto my face.

That is, until I saw her in the arms of another man.

WHAT THE FUCK!!

Is she cheating on me?! I was fuming!! There she was, laughing away with some tall, muscular looking guy and he had his hands all over her. What the hell was her problem? She's MINE!! We're together, she's supposed to be with me!!

_No, dickhead, she's supposed to be with Edward…NOT YOU!!_

Okay, okay…little mistake, but still, she's supposed to be with…with…someone on my side of the family, not this prick who's slinging her over his shoulder and taking her inside.

I was about to step out of the car and march over there when I heard Jasper talking to me.

"Dude, calm the fuck down, what the hell's your problem?"

I was gripping his door handle, about to make my way out of his car. I had to calm down.

"Sorry, I was just thinking about something. Alice called you?"

He still looked at me like I had grown tits on my chest, but he let it go. "Yeah, she's sorry for the big fight that we had and she wants me to go over to see her. You think I could take you back home instead?"

"Oh yeah, sounds good to me. I'm not feeling so good anyway."

Jasper nodded and turned his truck around, back out of the parking lot. We got back home in no time and as soon as my feet hit the pavement and I slammed his door shut, he took off like a bat out of hell.

Just as well, I wasn't planning on sticking around anyway. Edward still wasn't home and seeing that Bella was at the club, I stood there, trying to make my decision.

I can go to the club and seal the deal of being the worst brother on the face of this planet so that I can see my sister in law dance nude in front of me…

OR

I could stay home and watch some TV and wait for my brother to make it back and spend some quality time with him instead.

I had my ass in my car in under a minute, speeding off at a dangerous pace. I had to get myself over there and fast. I really needed to know who the fuck was holding her in his arms after such a shitty night.

That should be me that's holding her…not some grimy, nasty ass motherfucker. The problem was that I couldn't get a good look at him. He had been standing in the shadows of the club and I couldn't see his face. But I got a good look at his build and I hoped that it would be enough to go on.

I entered the building, scanning the tables and the people all around the club. I hadn't been able to locate Bella or that jack ass at all. This did not bode well for me. They'd better not be together or so help me god…

I found an area toward the back of the club that I could hide inconspicuously. Like it or not, I had told Bella I wouldn't be here to see her today and I was going to try to keep that promise as best I could. I owed it to myself and her.

I grabbed a scotch as I continued to look around the room. I figured a bit of liquor would help keep me calm and mellow and maybe loosen me up a bit. Lord knows I was wound up real tight tonight.

I'd been there for about fifteen minutes and on my third glass of scotch and still no sign of that cocksucker, when I heard the MC introduce the next stripper going by the name of Beauty…

And there she was. Dancing up on stage in a beautiful sea of red. I couldn't have dreamed up a better goddess if I had tried.

Bella danced around on stage, her confidence abounding as she strutted her stuff for everyone to see. You couldn't tell Bella had just been heartbroken not two hours ago from her husband. She was on fire.

I was a bit jealous that others were getting a sneak peek of her goods, but I was calmed by the fact that I actually knew Bella. These other bozos could only dream of having her in their life…I actually did.

I could hear the song ending when I saw something from the corner of my eye. I looked over and felt my mind churning. Just the person I wanted to see. I sauntered my way over, knowing that I wasn't going to back down, no matter what came my way.

* * *

**Bella POV**

The bright lights of Stiletto's flashed against the night time sky. I contemplated turning the car around and heading back home but the thought of spending the evening in our house consumed by thoughts of Edward made my stomach clench. Instead I shut off the car, shoving the keys in my purse and headed towards the front door.

A smile lit across my face as I saw who was standing guard at the entrance. Russet skin, dark hair and a smile so bright I could see it half way across the parking lot. Jake

As soon as he saw me coming the smile intensified and I felt my mood slightly lift. Jacob Black had been my friend since we were in diapers. When he had moved to town a few weeks ago to finish up his Master's in Native American Folklore, I knew he would be perfect as a bouncer at the club. Standing at almost six foot six and built like a brick shit house, Barbara had offered him the job on the spot. Plus he was perfect with the dancers, treating all of us like we were his little sisters. Nobody tried anything when Jake was on duty.

"Hey, Bells. I didn't think you were working tonight? Heard through the grapevine that you had some shmancy, fancy date with that hubby of yours." He said giving me a little twirl and a quick peck on the lips.

"Well…"

"Let me guess. He bailed…again. Geez Bells, do I need to go over there and knock some sense into his pretty little head?"

Part of me wanted to just spill my guts right there in front of the strip club. But I knew what would happen. I would cry, Jake would be pissed and then we would both be miserable. Instead I sucked it up, knowing that there was a bottle of Grey Goose right inside those doors that would drown my sorrows.

"Bus accident… he got tied up at the hospital." I gave a slight shrug of the shoulders. "Besides if I had known you were going to be here, I would have blown him off first."

His deep laugh filled the air as he pulled me in for another hug. "God, I love you. You know that right?"

His laugh was infectious as I started to giggle. Suddenly he took a step back, glaring at my feet.

"Where exactly are your fucking shoes?" He asked, sizing up my bare feet.

"Broke a strap, so I just slipped them off. Forgot I wasn't wearing any to tell you the truth."

I squealed as he picked me up, tossing me across his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

"Only you would walk across this nasty parking lot with no shoes on."

"Jake, put me down!" My legs flailed as he held on tight, swiveling to the other bouncer beside him.

"Brian, hold down the fort, 'kay? Seems Miss B needs an escort inside."

They exchanged a high five as he carried me through the door, weaving through the crowd, finally depositing me in the dressing room backstage.

"Now do you need anything else before I head back outside?"

"A stiff drink would be nice." I started pawing through the racks of costumes. The girls were nice enough to share their clothes so I wouldn't have to spend a lot of money on elaborate get ups. Besides the guys usually cared more about you taking them off than putting them on.

"Bells, tell me what is going on with you."

"Nothing, Jake. I have just had a bad night and I wanted to take the edge off." I shot him a tight smile as I pulled a skin tight red dress from the rack, holding it up against my body.

"I'll make you a deal. One drink. I don't want you out there drunk. And I am fixing to switch places with Troy, so I'll be inside in about an hour. One drink, Bella…one."

Silently I nodded my head as he turned and left the room. Moments later another one of the girls, Cassandra, came through the door with a glass in one hand the other tucked behind her back.

"Here ya go, sweets. Jake said to give this to you." She passed me the glass and with trembling hands I threw back the drink, downing it in one long gulp.

The drink burned in my throat as I let out a gasp. Still the feeling was good…alive.

Cass pulled the bottle from behind her back, refilling the glass in my hands.

"Thought you might need this." She said swilling around the clear liquid.

"How?"

"Barbara called said you were taking the night off. Then I saw Jake toting you through the front door, he comes out looking worried as hell. Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out."

"Just a psychiatrist…" I said with a slight smile.

She let out a laugh as I took another sip of fire water. "Not yet. Though a few more nights like tonight and I may be able to pay next year's tuition in advance. There are some big spenders out there." She sauntered over to the dressing table and swiped some bright peach gloss across her lips and smoothed her hair

"Oh God. I don't want to cut in on your scene tonight. I just…I just didn't want to be home alone."

"No prob. Barb decided to do two for one shots tonight so the money is free flowing. Besides it was _your _night. So if anyone is cutting in, it is me." She blotted her lips and headed towards the door.

"When do I need to go on?" I asked. The vodka was starting to create a warm feeling in my stomach as I sat in front of the large, lighted mirror.

"You have at least an hour. I did one set before you got here, so you've got a while to chill. I am going to go work the floor, unless you feel like talking about it."

I shook my head, curling my glass into my chest.

"Nope, I just want to get a little drunk, make some money and try to forget this night ever happened."

She threw her head back and laughed towards the sky. "The first two should be no problem. The last is probably a whole different story."

_No fucking kidding_. I thought as she left the room

_**

* * *

**_

An hour later, I was about a quarter ways through my bottle and feeling quite alright. I checked myself in the mirror, readjusting the skin tight dress. I dug through the large bag of masks that I kept to go with my costumes.

Nothing looked right. _Shit_! I always used a mask. I finally settled on a pair of sunglasses. Not exactly the best to hide your identity. Although who exactly did I think I would be running into at a strip bar. It's not like Esme's book club or Carlisle's golfing partners would be caught here.

_Emmett was._

The thought shot across my mind as I remembered him sitting at that front table last night. Of course my first reaction had been shock and fear. I had hurried to the other side of the bar, hoping he didn't recognize me. But I felt his eyes on me the whole time, burning into my skin. The more he looked the hotter I got. My mistake was strutting in front of him on the way off stage. I didn't even think about my birthmark. That he would know it was me.

_Or did I?_

I would be lying if I said I had never been attracted to Emmett. The first time I saw him I just about fell flat on my face. We were at a party celebrating his father Carlisle's new surgery technique that was going to be published in the New England Journal of Medicine. I was a gangly, teenager and he was this gorgeous college guy home for spring break. Of course, true to my nature, I tripped over my feet and went head first into him, spilling my punch all down the front of his white shirt.

Edward was mortified and Emmett…well, Emmett just laughed that loud, booming laugh and said that I was the most entertaining person to ever grace one of his parent's parties.

We had been great friends ever since. He was always the one to make me feel comfortable in awkward situations. He never cared what people thought, just enjoyed living his life. He taught me how to hold my liquor and how to shoot hoops without breaking my neck. Most of the exciting times in my life somehow involved him.

_And now?_

Now was complicated. What happened between us changed everything. Even if we agreed it wouldn't, I knew it had for me.

Of course, I could smile and pretend and maybe one day things would resume some sort of normalcy. But now…just the thought of him made my panties wet and my knees weak.

_I was so beyond screwed._

My first instinct was to blame Edward. If I was getting what I needed, if he was home more, if…if…if…

_So wrong of me to think that way. _

I had a wonderful husband, who though not the most adventurous, was a fantastic lover. And I knew deep inside that everything he did was somehow centered around me, our life.

_Does that include boning the blonde bimbette draped around him tonight?_

I grabbed the bottle of Vodka and took a long swig straight from the neck.

_Come on. All you heard was a couple of gossipy nurses. They probably think their hospital is something to rival Grey's Anatomy. Besides, what you did was just as bad…worse in fact._

Fuck, I had to stop thinking about it. Get through tonight, just get through tonight and figure out what to do to fix this hell you have created tomorrow.

Cass stuck her head through the door and I squirted a bit of freshener in my mouth.

"You about ready?"

I grabbed my sunglasses and checked myself one last time.

"Let's get this show on the road."

_**

* * *

**_I did a little neck roll, and bounced on the tips of my toes like a fighter getting ready to enter the ring. The alcohol was making me feel more confident than drunk, which I guess could be attributed to the ungodly amounts of Indian cuisine I had devoured earlier.

I listened as the DJ cleared his throat and the stage lights dimmed. I moved across the stage assuming my starting position as his voice echoed throughout the bar.

"Gentleman, I believe it is time to go a bit old school. For your viewing pleasure, I present the lovely Beauteeeeeeee."

I tensed momentarily as the floodlights landed on me, but then the lyrics pounded out as the smirk lit my face.

_**Step inside, walk this way  
You and me babe, hey hey **_

A collective roar went through the crowd as I began to dance across the stage._**Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on  
Livin' like a lover with a radar phone  
Lookin' like a tramp, like a video vamp  
Demolition woman, can I be your man  
Your man**_

I moved like a woman possessed. The cat calls and whistles stoking my ego as I shimmied from one end to the other. I stopped in front of the table Em had been at last night, a little disappointed to see one of the regulars, Frank, tipping back his usual scotch. He gave me a wink and waved a twenty towards me.

_**Take a bottle, shake it up  
Break the bubble, break it up**_

Pour some sugar on me, ooh, in the name of love  
Pour some sugar on me, c'mon fire me up  
Pour your sugar on me, oh, I can't get enough  
I'm hot, sticky sweet from my head to my feet yeah

Slowly, I undid the zipper that ran the whole front length of the dress, stepping out of it to reveal my tiny red peek-a-boo bra and g-string. The yells were deafening as I stuck my hip towards Frank and allowed him to slip the bill into my panties.

_At least someone is getting to enjoy my lingerie purchase._I thought wirily. In that split second of thinking about Edward I lost my footing and stumbled slightly towards the crowd.

Improvising, I fell to my knees and began to crawl across the stage. I stopped and lifted to a kneeling position, unhooking my bra clasp and letting it fall to the floor.

I noticed a group of younger guys at one of the reserved tables. Obviously a bachelor party because the guy up front was wearing a shirt that said 'Another dumb fuck getting married'. They were all hollering, waving money.

I resumed my position and slid on my hands and knees until I was in front of their table. I motioned for the groom to come closer, ruffling his hair as he tucked a bill into my hip. I noticed a drink on their table and leaned over plucking the cherry from it, sucking it into my mouth with a slight pop.

More hands waving bills shot into the air as the song began to wind down.

Just as the music ended, I took off my glasses and tossed them to the bachelor party table. A round of cheers and applause rang through the bar as the lights went black and the song ended.

I hurried off the stage, back to the dressing room. I couldn't believe I had been so bold as to remove my only disguise. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to drink before performing. Good Lord, I had even eaten something from a stranger's glass.

I grabbed my purse and began rummaging through for some tic-tacs or something. I found a roll of Lifesavers and popped a few in my mouth, hoping to kill the taste of vodka and frat boy's crown and coke.

I grabbed a towel and patted the sheen from my body. One thing to be said about stripping, in just the few weeks I had been doing it, I could already see some defining and toning. I was checking out my ass in the mirror when the owner Barbara walked through the door.

"It's gorgeous, doll. No doubt about it."

I couldn't help but smile at her. Barbara was in her late sixties, silvery white hair, New York accent, a body that had once been a Rockette and she wore the clothes to prove it. She was as fierce as a tiger if you crossed her and as protective as one too over her employees. She ran her club and she ran it well.

"Great act. Great. But I thought you were taking off tonight?"

I gave a shrug as I grabbed for a bottle of water.

"Change of plans. Hope it was okay if I came on into work."

"Sure, sure. You have more fans than half the girls who work here. And why wouldn't you …with that body and hair."

I felt myself blush at her compliments.

"Anyhows…I know you don't normally do it, but a customer has requested a private dance in one of the VIP rooms."

"Barb, you know I don't do lap dances."

That was one thing I wasn't sure about. I stuck to only dancing on stage where I could be anonymous, well at least until tonight that is. I didn't work the floor nor do lap dances and I had never been in one of the VIP rooms during business hours.

"I know and it's up to you sugar, But this fella, he offered a thousand bucks."

My mouth fell open at the amount. "A thousand dollars? What does he think I am going to do, screw him or something?"

"Asked him the same thing myself. Said it had to be you in the outfit you were wearing on stage. Now I told him we don't do none of that illegal shit here. Said he understood, no touching…just you dancing for him. I even told him I would have to have someone posted outside and he agreed."

The figures clicked in my head. The house got fifty percent and we got fifty. Five hundred dollars for a few minutes work seemed too good to pass up. But who in the world would spend that kind of money for just a lap dance?"

"I don't know Barb, it's tempting. Five hundred dollars is a lot of money. It just doesn't seem right. What is he old as Methuselah with no teeth or something?"

"No. Handsome young fella. Polite too. Just said he was enraptured by you …his words… swear to God. And Bella, it is not five hundred…it is a straight thousand. He coughed up two g's like nobody's business. But don't let that influence you. I don't want none of my girls doing something they don't wanna."

"A thousand dollars, for one dance. Is he insane?"

"Don't think so. But he did have one other condition… he wants you blindfolded. Now Jake or Troy can be right outside and we have the security cameras so you would be perfectly safe."

Oh man, a thousand dollars. My gut feeling was telling me this was beyond weird. But damn if this one little thing wouldn't pay quite a few bills.

I took another long draw of water and picked up a brush to fix my hair.

"Give me ten minutes and I'll be ready."

* * *

**AN2: Okay, so we have been talking and have decided that we are going to have some outtakes from this story...or should we say sextakes. They will be dirty and if you don't like graphic...we suggest you don't read. If you are interested, than make sure you have us on alert.**

**We already have a few in mind but if you have any ideas throughout the story that would you like to see um...expanded. Let us know. Come visit us on the thread or Twitter and you can find out who the first sextake will be about. **


	9. Chapter 9: What's Mine is Yours

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN:This chapter is dedicated to one of our pervilicious friends, miztrezboo. She sent us the inspiration for Em's scruff and now we are indebted to her for giving us daydreams about Emmett and facial hair. Make sure you check out her stories as well as her cohorts at the Fornikation Foundation. We love ya, girl. **

**Edward POV**

I rolled my neck. Damn. Hours upon hours of time spent in the E.D. and O.R. was starting to wear on me. I'd just had to hold a clamp on an artery for the past hour while one of the other surgeons did the repairs. We had two attendings, three residents and one intern working on this one poor man. We could only hope he would make it.

One of the other residents was currently propped up on the nurse's station. I grinned and stood next to her. "Tanya, great work in there."

"You too." She said with a smile.

I let out a snort. "I did the work I could have made the stupid intern do."

"Standish is an ass not to let you assist more." She said at once.

I rolled my eyes. "You know he wants all the credit."

Her smile grew. "But you'll outshine him once you get your attending."

I smiled too. "Thanks, Tanya. You too. You're a great surgeon."

She blushed just slightly. "Thanks, Edward. Really."

I shrugged. "It's true." I didn't give out praise much. Tanya had been my intern last year and I had seen what promise she had. I saw another intern that had promise to…I looked up and caught her eye as she walked past, tears in her eyes. What was up with her? That was when it occurred to me what I'd just said…'the stupid intern'. Great. Now she'd hate me. Well, our interns weren't supposed to love us anyway.

I rolled my neck again. "Want me to massage that?" Tanya asked me.

I smiled and turned as she jumped up onto the desk. Her legs wrapped around my waist slightly as I backed up to her. I let out a little moan as her hands connected with my skin. They were strong, lithe, just like a surgeon's should be. My head fell onto my chest. God, her hands felt so good…just like someone else's I knew. Such strength disguised in such a feminine frame…_no, you said you wouldn't think of it again, Edward. You need to find a way to end this._ But they could do things for me Bella couldn't…things I wouldn't _want _Bella to do. I want to love her, not fuck her. She deserves wine and roses, not leather and…

"Does that feel good?" Tanya purred.

"You have hands like a goddess, Tanya."

She laughed throatily. "Thank you, Edward. I seem to recall you enjoying my hands before."

She was only too right. She started kneading harder and I closed my eyes once more, enjoying her ministrations. I know I was making a sound akin to a purr…it felt so damned good…

"Neck hurt… love?" I heard.

Immediately my head snapped up, so fast that I dislodged Tanya and she grabbed my shirt to keep from toppling backwards. "Bella, what are you doing here?" I asked. Fuck. This was bad. This was really bad.

"Well, I was supposed to have dinner with my husband, but seeing as how he never showed, I decided I would come and see what had happened to him. I guess I got my answer." She turned and started to walk away when I grabbed her arm, pulling her back to me. _Don't walk away from me! _

"I called your cell to tell you I couldn't make it, but it went straight to voice mail." _Why is she here? _

"I left it at home." She shot back at me.

Of course. She left her only means of saving herself should she have a flat tire or, God, if anything happened to her! "Figures," I sneered.

"And what does that mean?" She asked. Great. Now she's getting teary eyed. Just what I need.

"Nothing. You are just flighty some times." I said, trying to maintain my calm.

"Excuse me, you son of a bitch. I am sorry that in my anticipation about our date I left my phone at home. If I had known it was going to get canceled due to Miss Magic Fingers here, I would have made sure to grab it!"

"What the fuck, Bella? Tanya was just massaging my neck. There was a Greyhound bus accident and I have been in surgery for hours. I'm sorry I missed our dinner, but I think saving lives is a bit more important."

She looked pissed. Well, if she was going to be pissed that I was doing my job, _saving _people, well, maybe she was more selfish than I thought she was. "Of course, of course Edward. But let me ask you something. Could you or could you not have left? There seems to be quite a few doctors around here. Was it that you had to stay or you wanted to?"

"Technically, I was off for the night…" The look she gave me could have frozen over the Panama Canal.

"Exactly, what I thought." She snapped. Now she's going to nag on me for this? She turned to leave again and I caught her arm once more, pulling her slightly off balance.

"You don't have a fucking clue do you? Everything I do is for us. I work all the goddamn time for you - to give you the life you deserve. You have no idea the amount of pressure I am under here. So yeah, I could have left if I wanted to but I didn't - I stayed. Stayed because they needed me here. I made a difference." I raked my hands through my hair.

"I need you too." She whispered before she walked away.

Did she think I didn't know that? I dashed after her. "Wait, Bella. Will you just wait a minute?"

She turned and put her hand out to stop me. "I have waited long enough, Edward. Do me a favor; find somewhere else to stay tonight. I need some time away from you to cool down."

"And where exactly am I supposed to go?" I asked her.

"I don't know and right now I really don't care. Call Jasper, sleep here, ask your masseuse down there. She looked like she wouldn't mind sharing her bed."

Crap. Okay, that looked bad. "Bella…don't, you know it's not…"

"I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?" She said as she turned and headed towards the exit.

"Damn it!" I said as I kicked the wall. "Fuck it all!" I tugged on my hair as I walked back toward Tanya.

"Edward…I'm so sorry. I had no idea she would…you know that…"

I blew out a breath. "It's okay, Tanya. Really. She just…she doesn't get it. You do, because you're here. You understand what our lives are like. Bella doesn't. She thinks I'm here of my own volition. She thinks that I'd rather be here than at home."

"Well, in a way, she's right, isn't she? I mean, here, you save lives! What do you do at home? Eat dinner? Bitch over bills? Fuck? Come on, Edward, you know you'd rather be here anyway!"

I hated it in myself that she was partially right. "Well, I guess I need to see if I can arrange somewhere to sleep tonight."

"You know…I know she said it out of spite, but you _could _stay with me…"

I held in my wince. Just barely. "Thanks, Tanya. Let me see if I can crash with my brother first, alright? Then, if that's a no go…" _I'll sleep in the waiting room of the hospital first. _

I walked back to the locker room and dug out my phone. I looked at it and sighed. I wasn't sure I wanted to talk to Emmett. Whatever bug was up his ass, I had a feeling that me telling him that I ditched Bella, even if it _was _for a bus accident and an E.D. full of victims, he'd still rip me a new one. So, I did the only thing I could, I dialed Jasper.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Jazz." I said dejectedly. I still hadn't gotten past what Alice and I were doing. And that guilt was eating me up too.

"Hey, Edward, what's up?"

"I…uh…I need a place to crash. Do you think I could…?"

"Yeah, of course you can stay at our house. The couch is always available to you, you know this. Can I ask what happened?"

I sighed. "Thanks. Well…it's like this…" And I proceeded to tell him about the bus accident and mine and Bella's subsequent fight.

"Dude, tough shit that's going on right now. The only one lucky enough to not go through any chick problems is Emmett and we don't have to tell him how lucky he is…"

I snorted. "Tell me about it." I didn't let him know that part of his and Alice's troubles were my fault. He just…he didn't need to know that. Well, he did, and I guess Alice and I needed to tell him. But not now…I had enough shit going on. "Thanks, I'll see you later, alright?"

"Sure, man, no problem." He said. I snapped the phone shut and glanced at the clock. Well, might as well get a few more hours in before I went over there and didn't sleep the rest of the night.

* * *

It was closing in on midnight by the time I made it to Jasper and Em's place. I flipped through the keys on my key chain, Emmett and I both had keys to each other's houses, as well as Mom and Dad's, but we respected each other's privacy. However, as late as it was, I figured I'd just slip inside…

Sure enough, there was a blanket and a pillow lying out on the couch. How nice of them. Jasper's truck was out there, but Emmett's car was gone. I guess he went and found a piece of ass tonight. Lucky him.

Speaking of piece of ass…I heard Jasper making a sound, it almost sounded like a growl followed by a giggle…wait. Is he…?

I started getting angry at him. Damn you! Don't you fuck around on Alice!

Then I heard, "Oh! Jazzy!" and I groaned. _Please tell me they aren't…_and then I heard, "Oh, God! Alice!"

Fuck. Kill me. I threw myself down onto the couch and covered my head with a pillow. The longer I lay there, the angrier I got. She shouldn't…but…I couldn't…I mean…it wasn't my place, even though I was…I mean, she…shit. I'm in hell.

They were making all kinds of noises now and that just depressed me further. I sighed, thinking about Bella, wondering if she was just as miserable as I was…I hoped she wasn't, honestly. Even though I didn't feel that her anger at me was justified, I never wanted her to be hurt by me any more than she had already been.

I heard Jasper let out a sound that was similar to a roar and I could only assume that he'd gotten off and that just pissed me off further as my thoughts shifted back to Alice. _Does she know I'm right outside? Does she think I'm not going to say something? Because I damn sure will! Maybe not in front of Jasper, but fuck…damn if I won't! _

I may have fallen asleep, but a giggle coming from the kitchen rocketed me back into consciousness. I got to my feet wearily and stumbled to the kitchen, bound and determined to get something for the roaring headache I had going on. To my surprise, Alice was there, sitting on the countertop, and Jasper was standing between her legs, reaching behind her on the counter for something. They looked so happy. My heart clenched even as my fists bunched.

"Have a good evening?" I said flatly.

Jasper turned to me and smiled. "Oh, hey, sorry, man. I forgot you were coming over. I didn't remember it until we walked out and saw ya on the couch. Alice was surprised. I guess Bella didn't call her…"

I felt bad for a moment, but then I looked at Alice. She had that flushed look to her cheeks and her hair was sticking out in every direction. Not many people saw Alice post-orgasm or first thing in the morning before she was all put together. So, to see her in a pair of panties and wearing one of Jasper's shirts was both comical and painful.

"Yeah, well," I said coldly. "You think when you two fuck you could be a little quieter, just in case you _do _have a house guest?" I directed my comment to Alice, who blushed. I knew she was thinking about what I was thinking about and damn right she should be blushing. She should be fucking _thinking _about shit instead of letting her damned hormones go all out of control…

"Hey, man, we let you stay here, didn't we? You can't tell me how to fucking act in my own place!" Jasper snarled.

"Fuck this. I'm out of here." I said as I turned on my heel, dashed to the couch, slid into my shoes and slammed the door behind me.

_Where the hell did he get off…? _I blew out a breath as I jumped into my car, gunning the engine and shooting out of the driveway. I'd had enough of this shit. I needed to be with Bella. I didn't know why, but my heart was hurting, as if something was wrong. I dialed our home number and it went to voicemail. Damned caller ID. _Of course she's not going to answer you, dipshit._ I sighed and left her a message, letting her know that I loved her.

I hung up and just drove, pissed off at everything and everybody, every single fucked up thing that had happened tonight. I couldn't have Bella, because she was pissed at me, I couldn't go back to the hospital because I was strung out enough as it is…God knew I didn't need a dead patient on my conscious, and I couldn't go to _her _because of all the shit I'd said…I was so fucked.

I don't know how long I drove. My mind was on autopilot as I drove down unfamiliar streets. A red light made me stop and low and behold, there were flashing neon lights, as if they were calling me in. I'd not been to a lot of places like this…and never by myself. But what the hell, right? I swung into the parking lot and sat there, staring at the sign. It seemed to mock me, as if it was saying, 'come on in, fuck up your life further, you piece of shit'.

I sneered at the sign, took the key out of the ignition, and stepped toward another speed bump in the road of my life.

* * *

**Bella POV**

The butterflies in my stomach were in major overdrive as I heard the tentative knock on the dressing room door. I pulled the sash of my robe a bit tighter as I opened the door.

"You about ready, Bella?" Troy asked.

"Not really." I answered truthfully. "I feel like I am going to lose my dinner."

"You don't have to do this, you know? I can send that guy packing with just a nod of your head."

I linked my arm through his beefy one and led him away from the door. Barb was so careful to only hire the most respectful bouncers and Troy was one of the nicest.

"I am sure everything will be fine. Just nervous. Besides I have you standing guard, what could happen?"

"Not a thing on my watch, Miss B."

We maneuvered away from the main stage, skirting the outer rim of the club. We slowly ascended a flight of stairs to where the VIP rooms were located. Each one had a bird's eye view of the stage, with curtains that could be closed to obtain privacy. Every once in a while a celebrity or high roller would come in and want to be kept away from the general club goers.

I gave Troy a questioning look as we started down the hall.

"So, I am surprised Jake didn't decide to come stand guard. He is usually so protective. I figured he would be having a fit about me doing this."

A strange expression crossed Troy's face and I knew he was hiding something. I stopped mid-stride and grabbed his arm. "What are you not telling me?"

"Nothing." He said while suddenly finding great interest in his shoes.

"You are a horrible liar. Now tell me what it is going on."

"Some guy jumped Jake for no good reason besides he had one too many drinks in his system."

My hand flew to my mouth as a gasp escaped. "Is…is he hurt?"

"Naw, he gave as good as he got. Soon as we got the guy out of the club, Barb told Jake to take the rest of the night off. Last I saw him he went to grab a drink. I didn't even let him know what you were doing. Figured it be best that way, considering the kind of mood that guy put him in."

"You are probably right about that."

We stopped in front of a door that had the word 'Destiny' written across the top in flowing red letters.

Troy let out a snort.

"I guess your _destiny_ awaits."

I rolled my eyes at his feeble attempt at humor.

"Please my _destiny_ is the two car notes and the credit card bill this is going to pay."

I pulled a bright red silk scarf from my pocket and handed it to Troy. Gently he tied it around my eyes, blocking out my sight.

"I am going to lead you in and put you in place. You need me for anything…I mean anything, you just give a shout and I'll be in here before you can blink. 'Kay?"

"I'm sure I'll be fine…if I don't fall and break my neck. I have a hard enough time not falling down when I can actually see."

I heard the door open and felt the cool air from the room hit my face. I grabbed onto Troy's arm as he lead me into the room. Although I couldn't see him, I could feel the male's presence in front of me as well as smell his cologne.

"Okay, buddy. I expect you to be a total gentleman with this here lady. You so much as breathe wrong and I am going to be all up in your shit. We understand each other?"

He let out a muffled 'um, huh' and I felt Troy's strong hands turn me so my back was turned towards the guy.

"He seems fine, but you need me just let out a whistle. How long are you planning on being in here?"

"I told Barb for what he was paying I would dance for about 20 minutes or so. Now go on. I'll be fine."

I patted his arm and sucked in a deep breath as I felt him leave the room. As soon as I heard the door click shut, I turned back towards the customer in the room. I knew from having been here during non-business hours that he was sitting on a deep red couch, the only piece of furniture in the room besides a small table to the side where you could place drinks. At least I didn't have to worry about maneuvering around lots of obstacles. Just dancing in place was going to be tricky without my sight to help balance me.

Slowly I undid the sash on my robe and with trembling hands I held it out blindly in front of me. A hand reached out to take it from me, one finger barely brushing against my flesh, just enough to be construed as a bit of reassurance. A slight tingle coursed up my skin as I pulled my arm away, suddenly very self conscious that I was almost naked in a room with a stranger.

"So, um…I know you have been told no touching. Troy is right outside, so no funny business. You know, I am really nervous about this. I have never done a private dance before, much less blindfolded. Are you sure you want me? I mean, there are plenty more beautiful girls who would be…" I was unable to control the endless flow of chatter that was falling from my lips.

"Shhh." Came from the stranger's lips and for some reason I instinctually calmed.

The music began to flow and I immediately noticed Beyonce's Naughty Girl.

_How utterly appropriate._

I let the music fill my head as I started to sway. I moved a few steps up until I could feel the edge of the couch hit my legs.

_I love to love you baby  
I love to love you baby._

_I'm feelin' sexy  
I wanna hear you say my name boy  
If you can reach me  
You can feel my burning flame_

_I'm feelin kind of n-a-s-t-y  
I just might take you home with me  
Baby the minute I feel your energy  
Your vibe's just taken over me  
Start feelin so crazy babe  
Lately, I feel the funk coming over me  
I don't know what's gotten into me  
The rhythm's got me feelin so crazy babe_

Now usually when I was on stage all my inspiration came from the single thought that my sexy husband was sitting center stage and I was doing a private show just for him. Every gyration, every dip of my hips was just for him, but now…now, every time I tried to picture Edward, all I could see was him between that blonde bitch's legs.

I could not get into this dance. Not exactly great for the guy that had shelled out the money either. I felt totally void of any emotion. I turned so that I was facing away from the guy and tried to collect myself. All at once a picture entered my mind. _Emmett._

I thought back to what happened on the hood of the car. His lips as they worked their way up and down the inside of my thighs, his hands as they squeezed my flesh. My hips stared to move in time to the memories.

_Tonight I'll be your naughty girl  
I'm callin' all my girls  
We're gonna turn this party out  
I know you want my body  
Tonight I'll be your naughty girl  
I'm callin' all my girls  
I see you look me up and down  
And I came to party_ _me_

_You're so sexy, tonight I am all yours boy  
The way your body moves across the floor  
You got me feelin n-a-s-t-y  
I just might take you home with_

I was on fire; the thoughts of Emmett between my legs fueling my desire. It was as if he was right there with me. That my body was his to do with as he pleased. His hands on my sides, pulling me to him…

_Wait_. I was literally being pulled forward. The hands on my sides were not a figment of my imagination. The guy in front of me was pulling me towards him, strong hands locked on my body. I tried to disengage myself from his grip, but he held tight.

"Listen, I told you there was no…"

I reached to pull the blindfold from my eyes.

"I want to touch you." The words rolled off his lips and my knees went weak. That voice…_Oh God_.

"I need to touch you."

I peeled the scarf from around my eyes and there he was.

_Emmett. _

"What are you doing here?" I whispered.

"I came for you." His breath was quiet and ragged. The five o'clock shadow making him even more attractive then what I remembered.

My fingers brushed against his cheek, sweeping across his mouth as he pulled one finger in, gently sucking it. There was no way to stop the moan that escaped my lips.

"Will you dance for me?"

I couldn't form an answer, so I just nodded my head.

His hands roamed across my body as I closed my eyes and let him have free reign over my flesh.

There was no noise in the room besides both of our labored breathing and the music being piped in through the speakers. And there was no need for any words. His large hands caressed my skin, sending jolts of electricity through my core, leaving me pretty much unable of forming a coherent thought.

I felt my breast being freed from the confines of my bra as his lips closed around the nipple, sucking until it was hard and erect. A soft sigh escaped my lips as he tugged at it, then moving to the other one, laving it with attention as well.

He quickly ducked his head down, encircling my navel with his tongue, his rough stubble creating a delicious sensation against the soft skin of my stomach. One hand left my breast and started to stroke my sensitive flesh through my panties. My breathing quickened as his fingers moved faster.

I released a small whine as he removed his fingers, thrusting my pelvis towards him at the lack of friction. I looked down to where he had reclined on the couch, legs spread apart, his large erection straining against his blue jeans The look on his face almost made me come where I was standing as he undid the buttons of his shirt revealing his muscled abs.

"Need you, now." He groaned as his fingers slipped into the band of my panties, dragging them to the floor. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a condom.

I lifted my eyebrow at him as he fingered the foil wrapper.

"Someone told me to always be prepared." He said with a slight smirk.

I slid to my knees, as my hands fumbled with the buttons of his pants. He lifted away from the couch just enough for me to shimmy them, along with his boxers, down to the ground. My tongue slipped across my lips as I watched him roll the condom on to his cock. As soon as he was done, I climbed on top, slowly lowering myself until he was completely sheathed inside of me.

My hips rocked back and forth as I rode him. I let my fingers entwine into his dark curls as I brought his lips to mine. The faint taste of Scotch, mixed with peppermint flooded my mouth as my tongue struggled with his.

He pulled his head away and began to nuzzle my neck, the coarse hair mixed with the softness of his lips, making the wetness between my legs grow tenfold.

"Oh God, Bella. Please don't stop." He whispered into my neck as his hands grabbed onto my hips, pulling me even deeper into his lap.

The husky sound of his voice sent me into a tail spin. I clinched around his cock as I gushed out onto him.

Over and over, I pushed myself onto him, each time bringing a new wave of sensation over me. My lips found his ear and I couldn't suppress the smile that formed when he shuttered at my touch.

I watched him; his head thrown back, a slight sheen forming on his glorious body. He was magnificent in every meaning of the word.

The song in the room changed to a slower beat and his movements changed to the tempo of the music. Slow…sensual, no words. I felt myself start to lose control again.

"Emmett, cum for me…cum with me." I whispered against his lips.

His hand moved from my sides and fisted into hair as he brought his eyes to meet mine.

"Mine!" He growled.

My eyes widened in surprise at the word. The single word rocked me to my core. I screamed his name as my body shook with the force of my orgasm.

"Mine." He said once more as his head fell against mine and he came inside of me.

Forehead to forehead we sat, trying to catch our breath. I couldn't bring myself to move away from him.

"Em…"

"Shhh…please, don't say anything. I came here for you. I want this, Bella."

"But, Em." My head moved to snuggle under his neck and I inhaled his scent.

"But nothing. I want you, Bella. Fuck, I know it is wrong. I don't care. I need you. I want you."

I wasn't sure what to say. I was married… to his brother, no less. But there was something in the sound of his voice…that made that very poignant fact…insignificant_. _

_I was wanted_.

"I want you too." I mouthed against his chest.

His fingers lifted my chin, so that we were eye to eye. His lips moved towards mine and I knew that I was about to cross the line between an affair and a relationship.

_God help me, Edward. I am so sorry. _

The lightest of kisses feathered my lips as I sank against his chest.

With a loud crash the door to the room flew open and I fell off of Emmett trying to cover myself. My head hit the small table and the room started to fade.

"What the fuck do you think you are doing?" Was the last thing I heard as the world went black.

* * *

**AN2: So... things are getting more complicated by the minute. Come play over on the thread and let us know what you think might happen. The first sextake is done and ready to go. It will probably be published after next week's chapter...but we might be sneaky and leave a tidbit on the thread if we get enough requests.**

**Also, we want to pimp out our new obsession, the Black Dagger Brotherhood series by J.R. Ward. You want majorly, sexy vampires? Fighting, deaths, sex scenes? Then this series is for you. We suggest you run... not walk to your nearest bookstore and start reading today!!! **


	10. Chapter 10: Cry Yourself to Sleep 1

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN: I know, I know...the update is effing late. All three of us are having RL issues. Soooooooo Sorry! **

**We do want to thank everyone who has put this on their favs and alerts and especially to all of you who send us a review- even if it is to curse out Edward. We knew this wasn't going to be your typical fluffernutter story, so the emotions you guys are feeling just blow us away.**

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**Emmett POV**

_Mine._

That word was thought out and spoken before I even had a chance to really dwell on it.

I had Bella on top of me, her body feeling so warm and soft. I realized, as she rode me, that I never, ever wanted to let her go.

Never…even to my brother.

So, the word was brought forth and spit out of me…like a bad poison.

I knew I startled her. We sat together, trying to gather our thoughts over what I'd just said.

"Em…"

"Shhh…please, don't say anything. I came here for you. I want this Bella."

"But Em…"

"But nothing. I want you, Bella. Fuck, I know it is wrong. I don't care. I need you. I want you."

I didn't want her to finish her earlier sentence. I didn't want to hear the word 'no'…not from her. Bella was starting to become a more permanent fixture in my life…more than she was before. There was no way I was letting her go.

She surprised the fuck out of me when she responded though.

"I want you too."

I was wanted? She really and truly wanted me in return? I lifted her chin up so I could gaze into her beautiful brown eyes. Bella was everything that I had been looking for. I knew she wasn't mine to have, but at the moment, after all we shared, I didn't give a flying fuck.

_God help me, Edward. I'm so fuckin' sorry._

Just as I was enjoying Bella's light kisses, the door flew open and Bella was out of my arms. I was suddenly thrown back from the sofa I was on and fell to the floor.

I couldn't see the person I was fighting with, but undoubtedly, he was male. The full force of the blow I received didn't stop me from trying to get this guy off me.

We struggled a bit more and I knew he was talking to me, but I couldn't make out what he was saying.

"Get off me you jack-ass!"

"Fuck you! You were hurting Bella. Don't try to deny it, I heard her scream!"

That voice…it was familiar. Why was it familiar to me?

"She wasn't screaming in pain you fuckin' moron! What the hell's the matter with you?!"

This dipshit wasn't getting the idea that maybe, just maybe, Bella was getting off in this room. There was no way I'd ever hurt Bella. She'd been hurt too many times already…and this guy was about to get a hurting himself if he didn't get the hell off me soon.

"EMMETT AND JAKE!! STOP FIGHTING RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME GOD!!"

At the sound of Bella's voice, both Jake and I froze on the floor and looked over at her. Her hands were on her hips as she was glaring at us…and she was pissed. I noticed right away that her breasts were exposed to us and she made no movement to cover herself.

I was just about to yell at her to cover the hell up when the name she yelled out finally registered.

"Jake?"

He climbed off me and reached out his hand to help me up. I guess seeing Bella's pissed off face was enough to make him realize that I wasn't hurting her. I was too stunned to take his hand though, and I just gaped at him.

"Jake, what the hell are you doing here?"

Instead of answering me, he turned to Bella.

"Are you alright? He didn't hurt you, did he? It sounded like you were screaming in here."

His hands and eyes were roaming up and down her body, as if he was checking her for bruises. Now, I've known Jake since we were kids. He grew up with our family and had always been close with Bella. I personally didn't know him very well, since I was older than he was, but to hell with friendship ties. If he continued to ogle my girl, I could not be held responsible for my actions.

Bella smacked his hands away. "I'm fine. Really, I'm fine. I wasn't in pain, per se. Emmett and I were just…"

Again, Jake looked my way as his eyes narrowed into slits. "Emmett? What happened to Edward?"

He turned his head toward Bella again, waiting for an answer as she began to fidget around with her hands.

"I'm still married to Edward…it's just that Emmett and I…well, we…you see, it's like this…"

"Wait a second. Are you having an affair with Emmett?! I mean, this is Edward's brother, right?"

Both Bella and I blanched. It just sounded so wrong on so many levels when it was verbally spoken out loud.

I couldn't allow Bella to go through this embarrassment or pain. "Look, Jake man, it's not Bella's fault. It was me. I came here one night, saw her dance…one thing led to another and…"

"Bella, this fucktard isn't good enough for you. I mean, you're already having problems with one Cullen…now you want problems with the other?"

Bella put her hand on his chest and scooted closer to him…her breast mere inches from his chest.

_This shit is not going down…_

"No Jake, no. I swear, Emmett's not…"

"Get the fuck away from her, Jake. I'm not about to lose her to some skinny punk ass of a kid."

"Emmett! Don't talk to Jake like that. He would never, ever touch me. He's my friend."

"Yeah, well, just a couple of days ago, you would've said the same about me, but look at us now!"

She bit her lip as she was concentrating on a thought. She turned to Jake and whispered, "Can I tell him?"

_What the hell?_

Jake ran a hand through his hair and sighed deeply. "Fine, fine. If it will save your lover from having an aneurysm, then I suppose so. But I'll tell him."

She picked up her hands in surrender and smiled a bit. "Your call."

Again, Jake stretched his hand out to me, to lift me off the floor. "I'll tell you what you want to know, but first, get up. I'll help you if you let me."

I eyed his hand, not exactly sure if he was a friend or foe yet, but for Bella, I grabbed it as he lifted me up.

As soon as I was on my own two feet, I was pushed into the wall closest to us. I would've been tripping and falling, seeing as I had forgotten my pants were still around my ankles, but Jake did a good job of keeping me up. He had me pinned there, his body on mine, totally blocking a way for me to escape.

"You know, Edward was always the pretty one out of you two. I always thought very inappropriately of him. But now that I see you up close and personal, I can see your very handsome too…in a rugged, manly way."

With that, I felt Jake's hand slide down my chest and lightly graze my dick which I had dangling out in the open.

I couldn't speak.

Jake, the guy who used to play football with me and Edward…

Jake, the guy who wouldn't let anyone get near Bella…

Jake, the manliest looking guy I'd ever really laid eyes on…

HE WAS GAY?

"Wh…what are you s…saying?"

He started laughing as he pushed off me. His eyes went down to look at my cock and if eyes could fuck…I would've been totally raped by now.

"Calm down, Em. You're actually breaking out into a sweat there, buddy. You'd better put that cock away before I decide to take you out on a test run. I'm sure Bella wouldn't mind…"

I quickly reached down and without turning my back to him or losing eyesight on him, I grabbed my pants and pulled them up, placing my dick safely back into my pants when I heard Bella respond.

"Jake, you asked for the same thing with Edward and my answer is no different for Emmett."

Jake sighed in frustration.

"Wh…what was your answer?"

Jake smiled at me. "She said it was fine by her as long as he agreed to do it…and she could watch."

I gulped.

"What did Edward say?"

Jake's eyes narrowed. "What the hell do you think? If he would fuck Bella the way she needs to be fucked and taken care of, maybe then I could ask him. But ol' Mr. Self – Righteous could _never_ spoil his prized angel. I swear there's something wrong with him. Mark my words."

"Jake…"

"No, Bella. It's true. Which brings me to why I'm in this room with you. He's here."

"What?"

"Edward…he's sitting right outside the main stage drinking his night away. I came here to warn you that your husband is here…but now, it seems that I have to warn you and his brother to stop fucking in these back rooms and get the hell out of here. If I was shocked by what I found, I would imagine he would be livid."

Holy fuckin' shit!! Edward was here!

Bella looked like she was on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Oh my god…oh my god…oh my god. I'm dead. Holy shit, he's going to kill me."

"What?! You mean he'd actually hit you?"

Oh, brother was going down.

"No, but hell, my life with him would be forever over. He'd cast me away from his existence! Emmett, you know Edward! He'd NEVER forgive me!!"

"Okay, I think it's time for you to calm down, alright? Jake is here and we're going to get out of here before he sees us. Not a problem, Bella."

Jake gave her the robe she had on earlier and led her toward the door. "Don't worry about it, Bells. I've got you covered. I like this Cullen brother better than the other one you have. He has what it takes to give someone a good time."

"Jake! Behave yourself. No more fantasies about my men. At least, not now."

"Fine."

Holy hell…I just stepped into the Twilight Zone.

We snuck out of the room as Jake led the way. We walked quickly, not wanting to waste any more time than we had to. My only prayer was that he hadn't noticed our cars parked right outside. That would be disastrous.

In order to go out the back door, we had to pass behind the main stage and therefore, the curtains that block our views from the audience. As we did, however, Bella stopped.

"What are you doing?" I whispered furtively. "We have GOT to go!"

"Hold on. I just have to see…I have to see for myself."

Bella stood in between us as she opened the curtain just a fraction of an inch to take a look into the audience. Sure enough, in dead center, was Edward, sipping away at his drink.

I had to admit, he looked bad. Messy hair, wrinkled clothes and tired, baggy, sad eyes graced his features.

_That's my brother. That's the guy that I love and would do anything for out there. And here I am, hiding behind a curtain in a strip bar with his wife, like a common criminal. I should be shot._

Before I could think any further though, I heard a low growl emanating from Bella's lips. Jake and I lunged for her before she could reveal us hiding behind the curtain. I peered out and noticed Edward tipping the featured stripper some money in her string like panties.

"Bella! Get a hold of yourself!" Jake was trying his hardest to knock some sense into her as we dragged her away to the dressing rooms out back.

"That's my husband out there! How dare he give _our _money to that…that…bitch!"

Jake forcefully made Bella sit on one of the dressing room chairs as he spoke to her.

"Bella, honey, let's go over some facts, okay? First off, that bitch out there is your friend Cassandra. She has no clue what your husband looks like. I'm pretty sure that if she knew, she wouldn't be out there dancing for him. Secondly, you're a stripper yourself. You know how much you need those tips. She's no different. Cut her some slack. Third…well, you're back here hiding with his brother. From what I could tell, he was out there alone."

Bella put her head in her hands and took a deep breath. "You're right…your absolutely right. He could've brought anybody here with him…he could've been fucking someone right this minute, and what am I doing? I'm here with his brother."

"Whoa, Bells, hold on here. I'm not sticking up for Edward, I just want you to see the bigger picture. Regardless, he's not at home crying for you now, is he? He's putting dollar bills in strange women's panties while you're pissed at him. Where's the logic in that?"

"I don't know what the hell I'm doing anymore. I just…I just need to get out of here. I don't want to go home, alone."

"Bella, let's go. We'll figure it out when we leave. We've got to go though, before Edward does and sees our cars."

She nodded and quickly changed out of her 'work clothes' and into her normal ones. She didn't even bother going into another room, and the way Jake was eyeing me, I could see why she wasn't worried one bit.

Once she was done, Bella kissed Jake on the cheek and walked out. I usually always did the manly handshake/half hug thing that guys always did. Now, I wasn't really sure what etiquette called for.

"Dude, Em. I'm still Jake. No matter what, I'm still the same fun loving, sport lovin' guy you knew. Don't worry, I'd never sexually attack you unless it was okay with you."

He was smiling as he said it, and I wasn't sure if he was joking, or not. I was hoping he was.

I gave him the standard man hug and shake when I met Bella outside. "Listen, I know you don't want to go home, but I have a thought of where we could go. Just follow me, okay? We won't stay if you don't want to."

She nodded and quickly jumped into her car as I ran over to mine. I had no idea if Bella would spend the night with me, but I was going to do what I could to make sure she did. Just once, I'd like to find out what it was like to wake up with her in my arms.

I jumped into my car and sped off, toward whatever destiny awaited us.

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**Edward POV**

_Yeah, this was totally what I needed, _I thought as I downed my fifth, _or was that eighth? _Shot of Mescal. After like, that third one, you didn't even feel the burn. Of course, I was chasing it with beer, but what the hell. Beer after liquor – drunk quicker, right? Or was that the other way around? What the fuck did it matter anyway? I was here to get fucking wasted and forget the fuckupedness my life had become, so it didn't really matter at all. Nothing mattered but that the cute little waitress kept the drinks coming and that sexy little ass on the stage kept shaking…

I held up a five dollar bill and waved it toward the stripper. Fuck…if Bella could ever learn how to do that, my ass would never leave the fucking house. Damn. I had wood and couldn't do a damn thing about it.

The stripper, what was her name? Mistress something or other. Boo, I think it was, which, for some reason, I found cute, sashayed over to me and I popped that money in her g-string. She winked at me and I happened to look back at the curtain. HOLY SHIT! Was that Bella? I blinked and rubbed my eyes. The curtain was back in place. I let out a snort. _Yeah, right, Cullen. Like Bella was bestial herself by being in this shit-hole anyway. Nope, just you and your nothingness is here. _

"Can I get another?!" I all but yelled as the waitress walked past.

To show that I was the rule rather than the exception, she didn't even blink as she nodded and hurried back to the bar.

I sat there drinking a little bit more, but all I began to feel was lonely. Shit. Emmett was nowhere to be found, probably tapping a great piece of ass, I couldn't hang with Jasper because Alice was all up in his shit…and _fuck, _don't even get me started on _her. _I deviated my mind from her and thought about Bella. She was probably home right now, crying herself to sleep.

_Great move, fucktard. What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you here? You should be on your hands and knees, begging Bella to forgive you! _

Yeah…that was what I was going to go do. Right now. I stood up…and weaved a little bit. Fuck. How much did I drink?

"Going somewhere, stud?" A voice asked me.

I turned around and found an attractive older woman staring at me. "I…uh…I think…yeah, I need a cab."

She let out a snort. "Ya think?" She looked at me as if she were sizing me up. Probably to see if I was a rowdy drunk or not. Huh. As if. I had only been drunk like, three times in my life or something. Plain, boring old Edward…that's me.

She motioned for me to follow her and I did as she asked as we weaved through the tables to the bar. She made a motion and the bartender handed her the phone. He also seemed to be sizing me up. Or maybe he was…? Nah, gay guys didn't work in strip clubs, did they? And they sure as shit didn't look like him. Dude was _huge_. He kinda reminded me of Jake. Tall, big boned, dark skinned, Indian lookin'. I blinked and looked at him again. "Do I know you?"

He grinned at me. "No, I don't think so. But I could be a _great _friend…" His eyebrows rose and he fucking _winked _at me!

"Can it, Seth." The older lady barked.

He grinned. "Sure, sure, just wanted to let the boy know what his options are."

She shot him a look and he cleared his throat, gave me another lopsided grin, and went to the other end of the bar.

"Okay, kid, your ride is on its way. Go on outside, get some cool air and he'll be along."

"Thanks." I said.

She just looked at me. "Thank you for not causing a scene."

"No scene. I created enough of those today." I said, thinking back to my behavior at the hospital and at Jasper's place. I knew I'd have to apologize to him at some point…but _her_…what I'd said hurt _her _feelings. I know it did. It had to. I stepped outside and my brain cleared up a little bit. I blew out a breath. I had to call her. I had to tell her…shit. What do I tell her? I didn't mean what I said? I was just…an asshole. Yup. That's me, the asshole.

I sat down on the curb and dialed her number. Of course, it went to voicemail. "Hey, uh, look, it's me. I'm kinda drunk right now. Had a shitty fucking day." I let out a laugh. "Like you don't know what I'm talking about. Listen, I know…I mean, look, I didn't mean what I said, okay? I was just…I was pissed and tired and blowing smoke out my ass…so, anyway, I just…this is wrong, ya know? What we're doing? It's wrong. But I…I was wrong what I said. You aren't the only one that needs. I need you too. You're…there for me, in ways Bella can't be. And I think, no, I know, that I need you too, okay? It's…it's more than just a release for me. You're like…fuck, it's like you're a drug, alright? And I need that fix. So…hopefully you'll find it in your heart to forgive me, yeah?" I paused. "Okay, well, that's it. I'll…see ya." I snapped the phone shut and blew out a breath.

The cab pulled up and I looked at it, debating.

I finally got into it and sat down. "Where to, man?"

I sighed. "Just take me home." I gave him the address and sat back, closing my eyes, ruminating on where the hell my life had taken me.

In no time at all, it seemed as though the cab pulled up in our driveway. I tossed him some cash and yes, drunkenly, made my way to the door. I managed to get the key in the lock and stumbled inside. "Bella?" I called. I stripped out of my shirt and threw it, I think it landed on the sofa, I'm not sure.

"BELLA!" I called as I toed out of my shoes.

My pants were next, and I tossed them off just as I reached the bedroom. I looked at the bed. It was made perfectly, no sign of Bella in sight. Shit. What did she do? Did she leave me? "BELLA! NO!"

I fell to the bed, sobbing. What had happened? What had I done?

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**AN: We told you Jake had a secret. And what about Edward- seems his head might be retreating from his ass just a wee little bit.**

**Like we said real life has been a bitch lately so we are still working on the next chapter. However, the first outtake is ready to go courtesy of MM1. Leave us some love and we'll give you a peek into Jake's secret world. **

**Don't forget...make sure you have us on author alert so you can get the outtakes**


	11. Chapter 11: Outtake 1 Smokin'

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. We assume SM is quaking at what we have done to her characters.**

******AN: **We were going to do a seperate story for the outtakes, but just decided to add them to the story. Besides, it gives Edward a chance to come out from hiding underneath the bed from you angry readers!!!

**We wanna shout out to one of our BEST reviewers. Annette, A.K.A. 'Net, A.K.A. Nethead…babe, we love ya! Here's your name in lights, even if it's not hooking up with one of the guys…**

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**Seth POV**

I watched as Jake brought Bella in, tossed over his shoulder. Jealousy wanted to flair, but I knew better. Jake was a one person man. He, unlike so many other guys I knew, wasn't a whore. And I knew he was mine. At least, I hoped he was. We had played coy for a while now, well, ever since he started working here.

I worked two jobs and didn't have a lot of time for a social life anyway. My money went to my sick mother and my sister had left, abandoning us in our time of need, right after our dad died, so I was kind of stuck looking after my mom. And that was cool. We were cool. But…still. It was tough for a twenty five year old guy to be trapped like I was.

Which was how I'd come to know Jake. I'd had a crappy day and the night was even crappier. He'd found me crying in my beer after closing one night and I'd spilled everything. All my worries, my hopes, my dreams, everything. And what had he done? He'd held me, let me cry, and then, just when I was about to pull away and put on the tough guy act…he'd kissed me ever so softly.

I honestly didn't even know he was…well…that he felt like that about me, or any man in general. Truthfully, I'd not seen his eye roam at all, either to women _or _men. He was just as devoted to working as I was, putting his nose to the grindstone as effectively as he could between school and all the tribal shit he had to put up with.

But that kiss had started something…something neither of us could control.

~*~

The night progressed and I watched in awe as Bella got up there and strutted her stuff. No, I wasn't jealous of his relationship with her. He was nice to all the girls. But there just seemed to be…something between the two of them.

I shook it off and went back to work. I was fixing a gin and tonic not long after that when I heard the loud voices, clearly telling me one of our customers had one too many.

I looked up just in time to see a guy reared back and he popped Jake a good one. This would have been the point where most people would have flipped out. But not me, I just sat back and watched as Jake whooped the guy's ass before hauling him out to the parking lot. My cock twitched in interest as I saw him working his way back through the crowd.

He walked up to Troy, who was talking to one of the waitresses and said, "Yo, Troy, I'm goin' on break. Barb gave me the rest of the night off." Jake's eye caught mine. "Handle things, T, will ya?"

The other bouncer nodded and said, "Sure, man, you know I look after the girls just as well as you do."

They 'shot the shit' for a few more minutes and I made up two more drinks. I was working my way back to the bar and found him looking at me. "Can I get a shot of tequila?" Jake asked softly.

The smile flew to my face with a rapid movement as my eyes popped up to look at him. I made him the shot and he downed it in one fast gulp. I groaned. I'd seen him swallow something _else _just like that yesterday morning…my cum.

"I'm going on break. Want a smoke?" He asked.

I resisted the urge to snort. Neither of us liked cigarettes. But that was our signal. Yeah. I wanna smoke. I feel the urge to suck on something…

I cleared my throat and finished the drink. "I'm going on break," I told the other bartender. "Be back in about ten."

She looked at me and grinned. "Better make it fifteen, big boy. Jake looks like he's hungry."

I smiled at Annette. She was one awesome chick, made a hell of a 'sex on the beach', and was completely cool with Jake and I. "Thanks, 'Net."

She winked. "My pleasure."

I followed along behind him until we made it to the employee lounge. As soon as the door closed behind me, I shoved him against the wall. He had a few inches on me, but I was able to get done what needed to as my mouth attacked his.

He let out a growl as his hands grabbed my ass, pulling me closer. "Fuck, Seth," He whimpered as I began to lick and suck on his neck and Adam's apple. "I need this…"

I grasped his hardened member through his jeans. "So I noticed." I said with a smirk. I made quick work of unsnapping his pants, dropping them and his boxers to the floor before I fell to my knees and took him in my mouth.

"Holy shit!" He hissed as I sucked him down my throat. My eyes closed and rolled back in my head at the taste of him. Sweet and salty, and all man. He tasted utterly delicious.

His hands fisted in my hair and I followed along as he set the rhythm. My hands went to work, one caressing his balls, rolling them gently, and the other…right to his sweet spot. I slipped one long finger in and curled it up to his prostate. He let out a growl and I heard his head bang against the wall. "Ungh, fuck. Seth…you want to end me this quickly?

I pulled off of him with a 'pop' and smirked up at him. "You know…watching you beat up that guy is one hell of an aphrodisiac."

He smirked, but I sucked him into my mouth once more, wiping his face clean of anything but desire. I pulled away from him again and said huskily, "Tell me what you want, then."

"I…fuck. I don't know." He all but whimpered.

I smiled. I loved having him like this. "Say it." I demanded.

He whined.

I tugged on his cock as I slipped another finger into him. His eyes opened, the black depths swirling with emotion. "Say. It." I asked him again.

"Fuck me." He growled.

The smile spread slowly across my face before I leapt to my feet and my mouth attached to his once more. His hands roamed this time, unbuttoning the fly on my jeans and shoving his hand in to palm my cock. It was my turn to whimper as his mouth traveled down to my collarbone. "You are beautiful, Seth," he whispered.

I felt the tears stinging in my eyes. "No, what we have is beautiful, Jacob."

I felt him nod. "Yeah, it is."

And just that quick, it had turned from a quick fuck in the employee lounge to making love. "What do you want, baby?" I whispered to him as I lapped at his earlobe. I knew that drove him crazy.

His body shivered. "I…I want you in me, Seth. Please?"

"My pleasure."

The logistics of two men having sex was not quite as easy as a man and a woman. You had to be a bit more inventive about it. Mainly because Jake and I weighed close to the same thing. But here in the lounge, we didn't have a bed, so our options were limited. "The sofa?" I asked.

He eyed the thing. It wasn't threadbare, but it had been around the block a time or two. He smiled, though. "Bent over the back of the sofa works for me." He replied.

I shook my head with a little laugh, though my cock twitched. "Kinky. I like it."

He laughed too and pulled me to him for another kiss. I reached into my shirt pocket and pulled out two condoms. Two, because I knew what would happen. It always did. Jake got so hot for giving up his control to me, that as soon as I'd finish, he'd turn the tables and enter me to finish. And…hell, I liked that, so, I was all for it. Besides, on the off chance that he didn't make it, at least the condom he would wear would keep the mess contained. And I knew he wasn't thrilled with the thoughts of his dick touching that couch anyway. I did at least know him that well.

Once our protection was in place, and he'd given me a smirk, clearly reading where my thoughts were heading, he leaned over the sofa, holding onto it for support. I eased up behind him, my hands dancing across the large expanse of his shoulders, down, down, down to his beautiful ass, caressing the skin there as I parted him. The second my cock came in touch with his flesh, I moaned. "I love this," I murmured to him.

"And I love it too."

That was as close to admitting our feelings as we had gotten, but it was close enough for now. I knew he couldn't 'come out' so to speak, not with all the stuff going on with the tribe, but I hoped that one day…one day we wouldn't have to be so secretive.

I slowly inched into him until he was panting for more. I pushed in to the hilt and held still for just a second. I waited, knowing what was going to happen next. Sure enough, he let out a growl and his hips bucked. "Fuck, Seth! Move, damn it."

I held in the chuckle. My lover was so easy to read. I knew what he liked and what he didn't like. I moved slowly out of him, drawing out the friction as much as I could, before slamming back into him.

He hissed and his hands dug into the sofa. I reached around him, grasping his cock as I began my thrusting. Fuck, he felt so wonderful as he surrounded me. I knew at this rate, I wouldn't last long. Besides, we didn't have time for slow, we both had to be back to work shortly…

I upped my pace, pushing harder, faster, thrusting myself into him as my hand worked its magic over his sex.

"Fuck! Seth! Fuck!" He moaned as he got closer.

I felt his ass clenching me and I knew I couldn't stop, it was coming, the train was coming. "Jake…"

"Yes! Come, Seth! Come now!"

That was all I needed to rip me over the edge and my body spasmed as I rose to the highest peaks of ecstasy. I felt myself go weak about the same time he straightened, turned, and pushed me into the wall behind us. I smirked as I knew what was coming. I loved this. I never minded giving Jake what he needed, but what I loved the most was receiving him into me. The pain, the pleasure, it was the _best _thing.

I felt his body line up with mine, the plains and angles contouring to match mine, the hardened erection pressing into me as his hands came around me, hugging me to him. His breath was hot on my neck as he said, "Do you want me?"

"Always," I breathed.

"Do you want this?" He asked as he pressed his tip into me.

"More than you know," I said, feeling my limp cock start to slowly harden anew.

His hand roamed down to me, peeling the condom from me. He flung it toward the wastebasket, where it landed with perfect precision. His tongue flicked that sweet spot behind my ear and he said, "I'm going to get you off again, Seth, while I'm in you."

Fuck…so _that _was the kind of mood he was in. Damn. My lucky day. My knees weakened at the thought of the pleasure and I felt him pushing into me. His other hand gripped my hair, tugging my head hard around so my lips met his. I knew why he did it too, part of it was his need to have his tongue in me at the same time as his dick, and part of it was so that the pain in my scalp helped ease the pain at his entry. But…I enjoyed pain, so neither bothered me.

His tongue plundered my mouth and I eagerly waged war with him as he began thrusting into me.

His hand was busy working my cock and it sprung back to life as if it had just been waiting for him. My cum from before was slick on me, giving his hand all the lubrication it needed as he thrust, hitting my prostate with deadly accuracy.

I moaned loudly and twirled my tongue around his. He drew in a sharp breath through his nose and I knew this wouldn't take long. I sucked on his tongue now, just waiting, all the while, the pleasure was building in me again. Holy shit…I hadn't come twice in one session in a while now, at least a few weeks…whatever the hell he and Bella talked about…well, I wish they'd do it again.

He quickened his pace, both on my cock and with his thrusts and I could feel his orgasm coming from a mile away, and mine was piggybacking that beast as it roared around the bend.

With our mouths still fused, his hand that had been in my hair went down to my hips to keep them stationary as he pounded into me.

We broke our connection between our lips just as we both fell over the edge.

I felt his rapid jerks letting me know he was coming only seconds before my own cum covered his hand and shot out only God knew where.

"Oh fuck, oh shit, oh, God!" Jacob moaned as he continued to cum.

I was beyond words at that moment. My head fell back onto his shoulder as he continued to massage my erection until I whined. He liked to keep at it until I was so sensitive I had to get away from the sensations. "Jacob!" I said as sharply as I could, given my now exhausted state.

He chuckled deep in his throat, the rumbling vibrated through my back and into me. I smiled and turned to kiss his lips once more. "Thank you."

His answering smile was as warm as his eyes, like the sun after a month straight of rain. "I think I should be thanking you, Seth."

"We'll call it even." I told him.

"We, uh, we made a mess." He stated, like a kid caught with muddy footprints on the floor.

"We'll clean it up." I told him.

"I…uh…Seth, I…"

I shook my head. "Don't. I know why you can't say it."

He just looked at me.

"Come on," I said with a grin. "I'm irresistible."

"A pain in the ass, too."

"Literally," I said with a laugh.

He let out a snort and I sobered. "I feel the same way, Jacob. And when the time comes, maybe you _can _tell me. But until then, this is more than enough."

He kissed me again, and I knew, one day…one day things would work out. I had faith that they would. Until then, we'd keep this a secret from as many people as we could. We'd hide and play the star-crossed lovers until the day when I could proudly stand by his side. And that thought was enough for me. For now.

* * *

**AN2: All our love to our super MM1 for this tasty lemon. Throughout the story we will all take turns with various outtakes- that while not essential to the plot- we want to see glorified. Let us know if you have any ideas. **

**And a tasty tidbit to get your motor running... next chapter will have some more Emmie lovin'-------YUMMY!!!!!!!!!!**


	12. Chapter 12: Cry Yourself to Sleep 2

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN: Yep...MAJOR FAIL! You should have had this a looooooong time ago, but you didn't. Tough titty said the kitty or WHATEVER!!! **

**You have it now and hopefully WET,SEXY EMMIE will get us back into your good graces. **

* * *

**Emmett POV**

Holy fucking shit, I've never been so scared in all my life.

Granted, I've never had to be scared shitless before, but given that my brother almost caught me with his half naked wife in a strip joint would've given anybody a case of the heebie-jeebies.

_Note to self: Always make sure that brother is taken care of before sneaking away to see his wife._

I was still trying to calm myself down while driving in my car. Bella did not want to go home…alone. I didn't want to go home alone either. To me, the best way to fix this problem would be to go home together.

Or rather, to a home of sorts…

We pulled up into the driveway and I jumped out of my car as soon as I had it parked. Bella stepped out and cautiously looked around her.

"Emmett…where are we?"

I shifted where I stood, suddenly doubting whether it was a good idea or not to bring her here. It had seemed like a good idea at the time that I had made it…but now, actually SEEING her here…I wasn't sure. What if she rejected me?

"Well…we're at my place. My new place."

She looked all around her in awe. "Wow…I had no idea you were building your own home."

"Yeah…no one does. So far, it's remained a secret. I haven't shown anybody this place…except for you."

She smiled brightly at me as she took my hand and led us inside. The house wasn't nearly finished yet. It had the outside walls, the wooden framing inside, working plumbing and light, but it still needed a lot of work.

"This is really great, Em. I'm flattered you brought me here first. I'm a bit confused as to where all the rooms are…care to explain?"

I laughed at that. I forget that I have to explain some things to Bella so she'll understand my work. I love what I do and I am always happy to explain anything to her.

We walked around my new home, cutting corners through walls and such, and she took everything in. We stopped in the kitchen area as she looked around.

"Don't you think this kitchen is a bit small?"

"Is it? I thought it was a good size."

She shook her head. "No, I would imagine it to be bigger. You're game room is much bigger than your kitchen is. You barely have enough room in here for an island to prep for food."

I scratched the back of my neck in thought. "Well, I never really thought the kitchen was a very important place. Certainly not one to make bigger than the game room. I mean, when I have guests over, they'll be entertained in there, not in the kitchen."

She nodded. "True, but when you try to make enough food for everyone, you'll need a big place to do it."

"I wasn't planning on making food…I was planning on ordering what I needed."

"What about your other half…when you get married? She might like a bigger kitchen."

I looked deep into her eyes and hoped I could convey my feelings toward her. I wanted her in every sense of the word…I just prayed she'd understand me.

"Bella…when I do get married, I don't expect my wife to be in the kitchen slaving over a hot stove for me. We can always buy or get what we need. I have no worries over the kitchen."

She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. I would give anything to know her thoughts at this moment.

Bella turned and we continued on down the house. She gave me her thoughts on colors for rooms, themes she'd like to see carried out and carpeting ideas. It was fascinating to listen to her, and while I didn't agree on some things, I kept those opinions to myself.

She stopped at the end of the hall and asked, "Do you have a music room?"

I frowned. "Music room? Why would I have that?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I guess just a place to relax, unwind after a long day and listen to some relaxing music."

I smiled. "That's why I have a game room where I'll have surround sound in. I can relax and unwind in there. I don't need a music room for that."

"Oh, I suppose that's true."

This time, I took her hand and led her to the last room in the house.

My room.

We walked in and she looked around as I informed her that this would be my room.

"It's a great size; very roomy in here."

"Yeah, I wanted my master bedroom to be big. I'm a big guy and I need my space."

She smirked. "You certainly are."

I blushed a bit as she continued looking around. I couldn't believe I actually blushed. I felt like such a moron.

"You sleep here?"

My makeshift bed was resting in the corner. She made her way to it and sat down on it, gently patting the spot next to her.

I walked over and sat down beside her and took her hand in mine. I covered her much smaller hand with my own and stared out into the room around me.

"Yeah, sometimes I do sleep here. It gets extremely late when I work and I'm so tired, I just decide to rest here and go home in the morning to freshen up, you know? But I enjoy it here…it's so peaceful."

The yellow lights inside of my home glowed brightly as I continued to look ahead of me. Even though my house had windows and doors, I could still hear the chirping of the crickets around us.

This was peace…this was home. Especially with Bella beside me.

"Emmett…I'm sorry I got you dragged into this huge mess with your brother. I don't know what I was thinking…it was wrong of me to do what I did with you…"

I quickly turned on her and searched her eyes. "Do you regret it?"

"No."

I nodded solemnly. "Neither do I."

She sighed and leaned her head on my shoulder. "When did your feelings for me change? When did they become…un-sisterly?"

I laughed at her terminology. "Well, to be honest…it never really left."

Bella moved her head from my shoulder to look at me. "What?"

I sighed deeply as I tried to put into words what I'd always felt for her.

"You see, when Edward brought you home to introduce us, I always thought you were beautiful. You have this…innocence about you that is part of your charm. I could tell you fit in well with Edward. He's gorgeous…even I know that. You were his perfect counter-part. Then, you went and spilled your punch all over me. The blush on your face was what sealed the deal. I was hooked."

"But you never said anything."

"Of course I didn't. Edward is my brother. I could never take what was rightfully his. Or at least, I thought I couldn't."

She squeezed my hand sympathetically. I continued.

"Anyway, I had my own life to lead. I made sure to talk to you and see you anytime we were around each other. Over time, I realized that I loved you more and more. You were going to be my sister-in-law and I knew it. When Edward told me he was going to propose to you, I told him to go for it. I wanted you in the family…always.

"When you guys got married, I felt it was my duty to protect you, as your older brother. I never wanted any harm to befall you, and I made sure Edward always looked after you. I always thought you guys lived the perfect life. I hadn't realized how wrong I was."

I glanced over at Bella and realized I had rendered her speechless. Maybe it was a bit too much too soon.

"Bella? Did I freak you out? I'm sorry…I just thought you should know the truth."

"I'm just shocked. I never noticed it…not once."

"No, you wouldn't. I never stayed alone with you for too long. I didn't trust myself with you. I knew I'd end up just staring at you, or getting close to you…totally inappropriate things to do with your sister-in-law. I always figured this fascination would end when I met the right woman…apparently, that never happened."

I looked over at her and she was smiling. She came up and gave me a quick peck on the lips and said, "Well, we apparently have a lot in common."

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Oh come on, Emmett. I've had a huge crush on you for years."

This time, I was the one in shock. There was no way…no possible way she could've felt the same way. I would've known!

"Are you shitting me?"

She giggled. "No, I'm not. Em, I always thought you were gorgeous yourself. You were Edward's older, good looking brother. The one I couldn't have. I have to admit…you starred in a couple of my fantasies."

I was shell shocked. How the hell did I miss this?

"When did this happen?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I do know that the night I spilled punch on you was the turning point of my feelings for you. I was mortified when it happened, and I could tell Edward was too. He was sweet though, trying to help me fix myself up. I knew he was embarrassed for me. But you…well, you laughed about it and made me laugh in return. You made it less awkward. I've been attracted to you ever since.

"I understand what you mean about not staying alone in a room with you for too long. After I spent some time with you, I always left with a huge grin on my face. You brightened my day…more than you could ever imagine. I was always afraid Edward would see right through me…he never did though."

Wow…we were definitely two peas in a pod. This whole time, I thought she was being nice about talking with me and laughing at my stupid jokes or sitting with me to play a video game. I never once thought she actually enjoyed spending that time with me.

"Did I shock you into silence, Emmett?" Her smirk showed me she was playing around.

"You did…you absolutely did. I never realized how good it could be between us, until now."

I leaned down toward her and took her beautiful, warm lips in with my own. My tongue went out and licked her bottom lip, begging for her to respond. Her mouth opened and her arms snaked around my neck as she kissed me back. I lifted her up and placed her on my lap, needing to be closer to her.

Bella's hands were on my chest and I felt her push me back. I laid myself down so she could straddle my waist fully. She felt so wonderful there…so right.

My hands started massaging her back as we continued to make out on my bed like horny teenagers. She broke the kiss off and moaned. "God, Emmett. That feels so good, you can't begin to imagine."

"Well, you've had a stressful day, Bellaboo…I can see why you're so tense. How about we go to my tub and take a nice long bath together?"

Her eyes lit up at the mention of a bath. "You have a bath here?"

I chuckled. "It's one of my weak spots. It helps me relax at night. How about it? You want a go at it?"

"Oh yes, that sounds _wonderful _right about now."

I sat up and gripped her ass tightly as I stood up with her still straddled around my hips. I led us both toward my bathroom fully prepared to give her a good time. Bella had been too tense for too long…it was my turn to show her what I could do for her.

* * *

**Bella POV**

My nose grazed the coarse stubble covering Emmett's chin as my tongue darted out lapping at his neck while he carried me into the bathroom. Each lick earned me a slight groan and a grab of my ass. My legs instinctively locked around his back, not wanting him to release me as his hands traveled underneath my shirt and his lips found mine.

"Dear God, Bella…as much as I would love to sit and kiss you all night, you are wearing entirely too many clothes for what I have in mind."

"And what exactly do you have in mind, Emmiebear?" I whispered, gently biting down on the soft skin of his earlobe.

My feet hit the floor and he took a slight step backwards. His hands moved from my back to the front of the thin t-shirt I was wearing, hooking his fingers into the v at the front. In one swift motion, the flimsy material rent in two exposing my breasts to his hungry eyes.

"Holy Fuck!" he muttered as he dropped to his knees pulling my yoga pants down until I was standing in nothing but a pair of dark grey panties.

"These need to go," he whispered as his tongue traced the band of the undies, allowing it to dip just a bit lower, sending goose bumps racing up my flesh.

I backed up slightly, whimpering from the loss of his touch.

"Nuh-uh, Mr. McCarty. One…you are still wearing entirely too many clothes. And two…I believe you mentioned a bath. You know I have been working awfully hard tonight, taking care of an extra special customer. I could really use a nice hot soak.

"The bath? Oh yeah, the bath." He snapped back to reality and scooted over to the tub and flipped the handles. I watched as his strong back muscles rippled while he leaned over, checking the water temperature.

He grabbed a bright pink Pepto-Bismol colored bottle and poured what seemed like the entire contents underneath the running water.

"Emmett, are you using 'Mr. Bubble' bubble bath?"

I watched as a bright blush crept up his cheeks

"Umm…yeah. I have loved them ever since I was a kid. I remember Edward and me making bubble beards and…"

My expression fell at the mention of Edward, a look not lost on Emmett. He scooted to where I was standing, wrapping his arms around my knees, pressing his face to my stomach.

"I'm sorry. Please don't leave, baby. I need you so much."

My fingers twisted into his hair as I lifted his face towards mine.

"I'm not going anywhere. Make love to me, Emmett. "

Slowly, he removed each item of his clothing. _Good Lord, his body is fucking magnificent!_ Both times we had been together had been so hurried and frantic that I realized this was the first time I was actually able to enjoy his nakedness. My tongue darted out, wetting my lips at the sight.

Two strides were all it took for him to be back at my side and the grey panties joined the rest of the clothes littered across the floor.

"You keep ripping my clothes, mister, and I'll be walking around naked all the time."

In one swift motion he had me hoisted in his arms as he stepped into the Jacuzzi tub, settling us into the hot bubbly water.

"My plan exactly," he breathed as his lips found my breasts.

His hands traced every curve of my body, gently, reverently caressing every inch of my flesh. Each stroke accompanied by another kiss or lick, setting my body on fire.

My whimpers escalated as first one, and then two of his fingers slipped inside my body. Pushing, pulling, curling until my screams filled the bathroom. Just as I reached my peak, he removed his fingers and placed them to my mouth.

"You taste so good. Here baby, open."

I wrapped my lips around his fingers and gently sucked, to his and my obvious delight. The next thing I knew, I was laying partially out of the tub; my back against the cool ledge and my lower half still in the water.

"Mmm …you are so going to enjoy this," he said as his head ducked under the water.

I felt my lips open as the warm bath water and his tongue attacked my sensitive flesh at the same time. Strong fingers grabbed at my hips as his head bobbed up and down, just below the water's surface. Every so often his head would briefly emerge for a quick gulp of air only to once again submerge as his mouth worked its magic between my legs.

"Oh…Jesus…" _lick_… "you are…" _bob_… "going to fucking…" _lick_… "drown!" I cried as he added his teeth to the mixture.

His head surfaced again, beaming with a devious smile covered in bubbles and my slick juices.

"Maybe…but what a way to go."

Gently he flipped me over so that my body was still half in/half out of the tub. Only this time, being face down, I was positioned so that one of the Jacuzzi jets was directed straight towards my clit. I positioned my body to receive the full force of the stream, as Emmett leaned over the tub and fished another condom form his discarded pants.

"Fuck, Em. Feels so good," I murmured into the cold tiles. My hands clenching at the slippery material as I tried to reposition my body.

"I know it does. Now let me help you feel even better."

I felt his body curve against mine as he pushed his cock into me. The sensations multiplied tenfold from the pressure of the jet that was in front of me.

The bath was filled with a mixture of moans and grunts as he pounded, harder…deeper with each thrust. The sound of skin slapping against skin, the sloshing of the tub's water, the whirl of the jets overloading my heightened senses.

It was so raw, primal. I surrendered every part of my body to him. I wanted him to use me, take me, claim me as his. I half expected him to straighten and pound on his chest like Tarzan. _Me… Em, you… Jane._ The overwhelming need to clench around him and scream obscenities as I came around his cock, threatened to spill out.

And then…the lightest of touches. The grip on my waist was released as hands trailed up and down my spine. Fingers twined into my hair, pushing it to the side as his lips placed kisses across my neck and down my back. Strong arms encircled my hips, pulling me even closer to him.

Soft words of endearment falling from the same lips that had ravaged me earlier. The concept that love and fucking could be so completely intertwined sent me over the edge with one long stroke.

The orgasm was so intense that I barely comprehended his own release just seconds afterwards. Every sense on end. The smell of the dissipating bubbles, mixed with sex and sweat. The feel of the chilly tiles against my sensitive nipples. The barely audible whisper that I was not quite sure I heard correctly as he came inside of me.

"So this is… love?"

My body tensed at the question. Could I love Emmett? Did I love Emmett? Could I let go of the entire life I knew after just one day of being with Emmett? Did I want to? Did he want me to?

So many thoughts bombarding my brain that I did not even realize that he had lifted me from the tub and swaddled me in a large bath sheet.

"Bells…Earth to Bells." I blinked furiously realizing he was snapping his fingers at my face.

"Now I know I am a fantastic lay, but you are the first girl I have ever put into a trance," he stated mockingly, buffing his nails on his bare chest.

"That you are," I whispered as my hands twined into his hair once again.

Slowly he carried us outside to the deck, his lips never leaving mine. Grabbing a blanket from the makeshift bed, he settled us into an oversize lawn chair, wrapping us in its warmth.

"It is really beautiful here, Em…so peaceful. The trees and the wildflowers…it is so different than being in the city."

"I know. I bought ten acres the first time I came up here. "

"Ten acres? That is a lot of land."

He buried his face into my hair as his arms tightened around my waist, his hands splaying across my stomach.

"I thought it would be nice when…I mean if, I ever had kids. A big space for them to run and play."

My head cocked to the side as his lips trailed across my cheek.

"You will be a great daddy, Emmett. You are going to make some lucky woman extremely happy."

"I could make you happy, Bells. If you would let me."

I shifted my body so that I was straddling him underneath the blanket. I wrapped my arms around his neck trying to convey my thoughts.

"It is not that simple, Emmett. I don't know what I am feeling. I am drawn to you, after just one day I can't imagine not having you in my life. But I love Edward, I always have. And this," I said gesturing back and forth between us, "Doesn't change that."

I felt the tears start to roll down my cheeks as I buried my face into his chest.

"Shhh…don't cry. I didn't want to ruin our night. I have never been the best with tact so I wouldn't be me if I didn't just get this all out there."

He lifted my chin until I was staring into his eyes and took a deep breath.

"I. Want. You. And I am going to fight for you, even if it is against my own brother."

"Em…"

"I am not going to push you. But I want you to know that by the time all this is over, you will want me, need me…love me."

I felt his erection rub against my stomach as his hands trailed from my face to my breasts again.

"Let me love you, Bella. The way you deserve to be loved."

We made love on the lawn chair, underneath the stars and then again, twice, in his bed until my body begged for sleep.

I scooted up to his body, trailing my fingers along his stomach.

"I should probably be going home."

He jerked up on his elbows and gave me his most pitiful puppy dog look.

"Stay here. Sleep with me. If only for a few hours, please?"

I couldn't resist his sweet expression, so I excused myself for a few minutes to clean up. I slipped on his discarded shirt and climbed into the bed, settling into the pillows. Moments later I felt a heavy weight thrown over my leg and torso as Emmett snuggled in behind me.

"Umm… Em. Can you scoot over a bit?"

"Hmmm?" he mumbled as he spooned even closer.

"Can you just give me a little room?" I struggled to disengage myself from his grip but I was already at the edge of the bed. One more inch and I would be in the floor which I was wondering might not be a bad idea. Don't get me wrong, cuddling is wonderful, but when I sleep, I want my own space. Something Edward and I had in common.

_Edward_

I heard a distinctive snore and resigned myself to the fact that I was not going to be getting much sleep. The rest of my night was spent wondering where my husband was while I was held in the arms of another man.

_Can my life get any more screwed? _

**

* * *

**

The sun was just breaking the horizon as Emmett finally rolled to the other side of the bed. Silently, I slipped from the bed and retrieved the rest of my clothes from the bathroom. I had to keep his shirt on as mine was lying in two pieces. I inhaled deeply, relishing in his scent. If there could be a smell called sexy man, Emmett would have the patent on it.

I stopped at the mattress and contemplated waking him up to let him know I was leaving, but he looked so peaceful that I opted to just let him sleep. My fingers ran through his curls as I placed a delicate kiss on his forehead. He shifted and smiled in his sleep as he pulled a pillow to his body, snuggling it in place of me.

I slid into my car and looked at the unfinished house in front of me. I knew what was missing. It needed a woman's touch. It needed that bit of love that would turn it from a house into a home.

I felt a twinge of jealousy that another woman might one day be in this house, in his bed. It was too much to think about as the sun rose. I needed to get home and get some sleep before I could even start to fathom what the fuck I was going to do with my life.

Twenty minutes later, I was pulling into my driveway. I assumed Edward had taken my warning on not coming home as his car was not there. I wasn't sure to be relieved, or furious that he had stayed away, but seeing as how I had just come from a night-long sexfest with his brother, I figured that him still being gone was probably a blessing on my part.

I made a beeline to the bathroom, my mind still wrapped around the images of Emmett and I sitting on his back porch. After we had made love we had sat for almost an hour just talking about nothing in general…enjoying the last of the warm nights.

Turning on the shower as hot as I could stand, I played the entire events of the previous night in my mind. I had been with Edward for so long that maybe I was more in love with the idea of Edward and I than actually being_ in_ love with Edward. Honestly, it made my head hurt.

I shut off the water and headed to the bed. To my surprise, Edward was asleep, tangled up in the covers.

I eased into my side as my eyes raked over his form. He smelled of booze and sweat but what most drew me in was that even in his sleep he looked exhausted. I carefully reached over and pushed a lock of hair away from his eye. I couldn't help myself as my fingertips gently grazed across his cheek, down to his lips and back up again, tracing the contours of the face that I had loved for so many years.

Eyes still closed, his hand grasped around my wrist as he held it firmly to his face. A soft sob escaped his lips, yet he never opened his eyes.

"I'm sorry. Please don't leave me, baby."

My breath caught in my throat as I remembered hearing those same words earlier…from Emmett.

"Edward…" I whispered.

His eyes never opened and I could tell from his steady breathing that he was somewhere between sleep and awake.

" Bella…need you…love you," he murmured as he released his grip and turned on his other side.

"I love you too," I whispered back. And I meant it, I really did. I loved Edward but now there was someone else in my heart as well.

I turned away and sobbed into my pillow.

What had happened to my life? What had I done?

* * *

**AN2: We have forged our smutterific bond with the girls of the Fornication Foundation. We review stories, share pictures of hot men, post awesome playlists - basically have a great time being women with an unhealthy obsession of Twilight and partially nude men. Come-- share-- explore our freaky universe. The link is on our profile. You won't want to miss it. **


	13. Chapter 13: Cry Yourself to Sleep 3

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

**AN: In all honesty, our plates are so damn chock full we are at a loss for anything clever to say. So read on peeps...read on.**

* * *

**Edward POV**

I was standing in a darkened room when suddenly I heard music. It was "Have I Told You Lately That I Love You" by Rod Stewart, our wedding song. Bella had taken dance lessons at my insistence so we could dance as husband and wife. I stepped out from the stairwell…and why was I in the stairwell? into the crowded reception hall. I looked for her and saw her standing, talking to another man. Odd, something seemed familiar about him, but I couldn't say what, and for some reason, I could make out none of his features.

"Bella!" I called.

She turned to me and smiled sadly. Why was she upset? Had I done something? She turned and I saw her hand clasped with this other man. What is going on? I started forward only for the crowd to become too thick for me to penetrate.

"Bella!" I called again. "Wait!"

Her eyes met mine and I saw love warring with something else along with the sadness. "Bella! Please!" I pushed and shoved and tried my damnedest, but I couldn't reach her.

The broad shouldered man whispered something in her ear and she laughed, happiness seeming to bloom from her. She tightened her grip on his hand and they turned together. I was almost to her and said the one thing I could think of as a sob escaped me. "I'm sorry. Please don't leave me, baby."

She turned back to face me again. "Edward…"

"Please. Need you…love you," _so much. You are my life…_

"I love you too," she whispered as she turned away, walking out with the stranger.

I ran after her, but I couldn't find her. I ran back into the reception hall looking for my keys. Emmett had them, had stolen them so he could decorate my car for mine and Bella's escape from our wedding. I couldn't find him either. Suddenly remembering the key I had under the wheel well, I raced out to find Emmett driving off with some girl in the passenger seat.

I heard their mocking laughter as they drove away and I sank to my knees, pulling out fistfuls of my own hair…

~*~

I awoke with a start. It was a dream. It was all a fucking dream…but still, the sensation of being alone stayed with me. Why? What happened? It all came rushing back to me and my head whipped over to Bella's side of the bed. She was curled in a tight ball next to me. It was then that I noticed the day had broken a while ago. I looked at the clock; nine AM. I was elated. _SHE CAME HOME! _

I kissed her ear and she moaned.

"Bella, I love you," I whispered, almost conspiratorially.

Her soft brown eyes opened and she smiled a sleepy smile. "Edward…"

I kissed her, hard, putting all my feelings into it. I pulled away and whispered, "Bella…let me love you."

Her eyes opened from where they had closed while I kissed her and she sighed. "Edward, we really need to…"

I put my finger to her lips as I easily found my way between her legs. "Not now, please? I need you. I screwed up, I know I did. I was wrong. I'm sorry. I need you, Bella. I can't live without you. You're my whole life. Please…don't…don't hate me. Don't…don't walk away from us. Let me try and explain. But first, let me love you. I need you, desperately. I need to show you with my body how much you mean to me. If…if you want me to cut back my hours, I will. I'll try to do whatever you need…"

She just looked at me, tears in her eyes. "Okay," she whispered softly.

I smiled as I took her lips with mine and softly kissed her, tracing them with my tongue. She whimpered and opened for me, all of her opened for me. My tongue entered her almost simultaneously with my cock as I began to slowly love her.

She seemed…almost hesitant at first, but I pulled away slightly and said, "No, don't fight it, don't fight _us_, Bella. I was wrong, so wrong. I've taken you for granted. I…I won't change overnight, but I swear to try…"

She smiled at me just a bit and her legs wrapped around me. "I love you, Edward. You…infuriate me, disappoint me, you make me crazy, but, one thing I have to admit…you complete me. I don't know who I would be if I weren't your wife."

I kissed her once more as I started to move within her. "I love you," I said on every upstroke. I kissed her lips, her eyes, her chin, her nose, and down, I kissed her neck, her chest, each perfect breast until I had her strung out, begging for her release, and I played her like I would one of Beethoven's finest pieces. We were a masterpiece together as we loved.

And finally, when I had gotten her off two earth-shattering times, I allowed myself to flow with her on her third and we came together on a glorious high.

"Oh, Edward…" she whimpered as I kissed her now sweat drenched skin.

"Mmm…I love it when you taste of sweat and salt and me."

She froze for just a second before she smiled. "Well, then, Mr. Cullen, would you care to shower with me?"

She was flirting with me? God, I love this woman. I grinned and moved off of her, pulling her to a sitting position. "You go, start the water. I'll be right in, love, okay?"

She giggled as I swatted her ass very gently and she made her way into the bathroom. I walked over to my discarded pants to grab my phone and check for messages. Shit. Three voicemails.

I dialed in quickly as I heard Bella start to sing, something she hadn't done much lately. Hearing her caused me to smile. Just then, I heard something hit the window. I dashed to it, but didn't see anything. Huh…must have been a bird. We got that a lot with the large windows and the occasional sunlight hitting them, birds thought they were seeing other birds. It was sad really. I guess I would go out there and look for a dead bird later.

"Edward?" Bella called.

"Yeah, sorry, I thought I heard something. I think a bird hit the window again. We'll have to look later."

"Poor birdies! I wish we could figure out a way to detract them."

"Me too, sweetheart. I'm just going to check my messages on my phone before I jump in there, okay?" I put in my PIN number and waited for my messages to start. I heard the return number for the first call and my stomach flip-flopped.

_Edward, it's me. Look, you and I both know what we're doing is…yeah, well, anyway, I forgive you for being an asshole. It's just the way you are, right? _She gave a little laugh. _You know where to find me today. Meet me, five o'clock; our place, if you want to talk more about how you are going to make this up to me. Because, trust me, it will be big. _

I gulped. She wanted to meet me. But…Bella…

_Bella will never be your whore, Edward, _I thought to myself._ And that's what SHE is…your whore. What's wrong with having a whore on the side when you have a loving wife? Absolutely nothing. I'm sure if you polled doctors in the hospital, you'd be amazed at the number of fucks that have women, multiple women, on the side. You only have one. _

I blew out a breath as I listened to the other messages. One was the mortgage company. We were late on our payment. Again. The second was one from my mother, wanting to know if we wanted to come for Sunday dinner.

I ran my hand through my hair and heard Bella calling out for me. "Edward? Are you coming?"

I deleted all my messages and walked into the bathroom and over to the shower. "I was just checking my messages."

"Sorry, didn't hear you," she said with a smile. "Who was it?"

"Uh…just Mom. She wants to know if we want to come for dinner tonight. We're supposed to let her know."

"Oh. Well, do you have to work?"

I thought of _her _and resisted the urge to sigh. If I went to the hospital, I knew what would happen. I would fuck her. She was…there was this pull to her. I couldn't explain it. But if I didn't show…she'd be fucking pissed the hell off. "Not necessarily. If you want to go, we can. Otherwise, we can just relax here. I probably should run in and check on a few patients, just to check on their progress, but I could be back home in an hour." _Maybe less if you get her off really quick…_

Bella smiled. "You promise?"

I held out my finger. "Pinky swear."

She giggled and shook it. I'm so going to hell…

* * *

**Emmett POV**

I reluctantly opened my eyes from a wonderful dream of having Bella by my side forever. She had taken my hand as we walked out of a familiar building, and we drove off into the sunset, both of us giggling like lovesick fools.

If only life could be that sweet and simple.

Sadly, when I woke up, Bella was nowhere in sight. I tried not to feel disappointment, but it was hard not to when you'd just spent the night before declaring unknown feelings to one another.

I got up and quickly dressed myself, intent on seeing the love of my life this morning. Knowing Edward, he might still be over at my house barely waking his ass up from a long, drunk filled evening.

I had time.

Jumping into my car, I quickly headed in the direction of Bella's house. I turned up the car radio, enjoying this beautiful day.

Finally, after so many years of hiding my feelings and never knowing how she felt in return, it was all out there, our feelings made known. It was a total relief…a weight off my shoulders.

Of course, that weight was now replaced with a bigger one…and it had Edward's name written all over it.

_Could I do it? Could I really fight my brother over the love of his wife? The only person he's ever really loved?_

I wasn't an idiot. I knew Edward loved her…despite how he treated her. He only did those things because he thought it was best for her. He's always had her best interest at heart…the thing was, I also wanted her and had her best interest at heart as well.

But the question remained. Could I…would I be able to take her when the time came? Bella was his world…the problem was, she was mine as well.

I quickly put away those morbid thoughts as I approached her house. Just as I thought, Edward's car was nowhere to be seen.

Perfect.

I jumped out of my car and walked up her drive, grabbing the flowers I had picked for her from my yard. I remembered she had made a comment yesterday on how beautiful they were.

_These are beautiful…just like her._

Making my way to the front porch, I knocked on the door, waiting and looking around the front yard.

_You know, this might not be such a good idea if Edward all of a sudden decided to come home. _

_Hmm…true…but I could always come up with some excuse at the last minute._

_Good enough for me._

I turned my attention back to the door and knocked again; still no answer. Figuring Bella must be sleeping, I made my way to the back of the house. I could wake her up with a rap at her bedroom window.

Except, I was not prepared for what I saw…

Edward was home…and not only was he home, he was with Bella.

I quickly looked away from the window but it was too late. The image was already burned in my head.

He was on top of her…looking down at her, kissing her and moving his hips up and down underneath the blankets.

No.

This had to be a horrible dream. Just hours ago, I was with her…moving my own hips up and down her body, proclaiming my love for her.

I wanted to imagine he was fucking her…that it was only a fuck. Because I knew that it would hurt less than knowing he was making love to her…just as I had been. But his next words confirmed my fears…

"No, don't fight it, don't fight _us_, Bella. I was wrong, so wrong. I've taken you for granted. I…I won't change overnight, but I swear to try…"

Being the masochist that I was, I looked in the window again and saw the look on Bella's face…it was full of love.

She smiled up at him just a bit as her legs wrapped around him. What she said next broke my heart. "I love you, Edward. You…infuriate me, disappoint me, you make me crazy, but, one thing I have to admit…you complete me. I don't know who I would be if I weren't your wife."

I looked away, trying my damnedest not to run into the house and yank my brother off her and declare my love for her. At this point, after what I'd just heard, I wasn't exactly sure what she was looking for…I wasn't sure if she even wanted me.

I didn't need to look back in the window to know what was going on. I could hear his constant words of love and the motion of the bed going as he was doing so.

I couldn't move. I knew I should've…but all I could hear was their love-making…and Bella. I imagined what her face looked like as she came all around him. I wondered if I crossed her mind at all…or if she even wanted me…or if she meant it when she said that being Edward's wife was what defined her.

This was a sick mess that I had gotten myself into. I loved her. Edward loved her. Yet, she loved us both…and nobody was going to back down. Sure Edward didn't know about this yet…but sure as shit, when he found out, he wasn't going to take this lying down. I knew Edward…he was going to fight for her.

I heard her release one more time, as did Edward, and I knew they were through. I wanted to move away…before I got caught, before one of them saw me, but my body felt paralyzed. I was too hurt, the pain still too raw.

"Mmm…I love it when you taste of sweat and salt and me."

"Well, then, Mr. Cullen, would you care to shower with me?"

"You go, start the water. I'll be right in, love, okay?"

I peeked into the window again, and noticed that Bella and Edward looked to be…flirting? That can't be right. What's more…she just suggested a shower with him.

She couldn't have…I mean, we just…no…Bella and I had just come from my place…

Fuck. I've had it. My heart, my body, my mind…my very being couldn't take this anymore. I no longer knew what to do, what to think. I looked down at the flowers I held in my hand and dropped them to the floor. There was no longer any need for them.

The pain I felt in my body was so great, I could do nothing but slam my fist against the wall of the house. Immediately, I realized my error as Edward had yet to get into that shower with Bella. I quickly took off running back to my car and jumped in, making a mad dash back home.

There was no way I could go back to the one I was building…not with memories of Bella still fresh on my mind.

I finally arrived and slammed the front door shut, aware that Jasper was home. I couldn't talk to him now…he'd know something was up.

I found him in the living room, watching TV as I attempted to walk past him. I should've known I wouldn't be able to walk past him though…Jasper was able to feel my bad attitude a mile away.

"What's up with you, Em? You don't look so hot."

"Nothing. I'm going up to my room. I don't want to be disturbed, okay?"

Jasper has always been really weird. I can't describe it…it's like he's able to look deep inside you and know what you're feeling. He's always been that way…with me, Alice, Edward and Bella.

"Bullshit. Don't act like a girl. What happened to you? You look like your whole world has come crashing down around you. What gives?"

"Fuck, Jazz. Just leave it. I told you I didn't want to talk about it, okay? Please, just drop it."

My outburst was unexpected, even to me, but it didn't make Jasper flinch one inch. He shrugged and replied, "Fine. Have you seen your brother though? I've got a few choice words for him."

Edward.

I didn't even want to think about that fucktard.

"Haven't seen him, don't care too and if he comes around, I'm not here, okay?" I turned my back and walked to my room.

"Oh…I see. This is a family problem. Well, don't get me involved. Whatever it is, you two will work it out. You guys always have. I've never known anything to get in between you and Edward for too long."

I stopped mid step and looked over at Jazz.

"What?"

He looked back at me and smiled. "Well, sure. You and Edward have always had your differences, but that's never stopped the close bond you two have always had. You guys always work it out. I've never known you two to be mad at one another for more than a day or two. That's what I've always admired about you guys. You're tight. But like I said…don't get me involved. Nothing worse than having to choose sides when I'm best buds with the both of you."

I nodded and looked down, lost in my thoughts. He was right. Edward and I never stayed mad at one another for too long. That's how we've always been. We were tight…always have been, always…will be.

No. Not true. After the shit hits the fan, we would no longer be close. And that thought killed me.

"Hey, Em - look, buddy, don't worry about it. What you guys are going through can't be that bad. You guys will get over it, like you always do. I have faith in that. You're bond with one another is very strong…just give it time."

I looked at my friend, and realized that he was wrong. He was very wrong…and there was no way in hell I was going to drag him into my shit. He had enough of his own.

I sighed and nodded, attempted to smile and walked away. Whatever would happen in the future, it would not be easy. But no matter what, if Bella still wanted me, I would fight. If she still wanted even a part of me, I would be here…because I could not let her go.

And I knew…I knew that would be the end of me.

And it would be the end of me and Edward.

And…I couldn't help but wonder if that would destroy anything Bella and I could ever build together.

I stripped naked and flopped myself down on the bed, covering my head with a pillow to block out the light. Confusion and grief...love and hatred all bore down on me at the same time. Silent tears streamed down my face as my head battled with the thoughts of either destroying my brother, myself or the woman I was falling in love with.

What had happened to my life? What had I done?

* * *

**AN2: Okay so if you want to find us we are all over the damn place now. Twilighted, Twitter, Fornication Station...we love to chat so come out and play.**

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**YEE-HAW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**


	14. Chapter 14: Sunday Showdown

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight. That is all. **

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I smiled as I heard my phone give off _his _ringtone. A text. I snatched my phone from my purse to read it;

_Going to dinner Mom & Dad's. Have 2 check on Pt. Meet me our spot._

I couldn't help the smirk. He's just like all the rest. Men are so damned predictable.

I hurried out of the mall and jumped into my baby, my white sports car. I wanted yellow, but the shade was _not _what I wanted. Why do car manufacturers insist on the horrid baby shit yellow? Don't they know I wanted BANANA yellow? I would have settled for red, my second favorite color, but the nearest one was in California, and I didn't want to wait for it to arrive, so I got the white. And I'm quite satisfied with it, actually.

I made it to the hospital in record time, only to find him waiting, half undressed. "You're late," he said with a growl.

I grinned. "Nordstrom waits for no man, or booty call for that matter, Edward. Didn't you know that? And the fabulous Ferragamo's I bought certainly couldn't take one more moment of misery. You should have seen the fat fuck trying to get her feet into those precious shoes."

He rolled his eyes. "Whatever. I don't have time for your dalliances. I'm on a time schedule."

"Yes, well, you're not the only one with places to be, Edward. Perhaps we should just forget about this…" I turned toward the door only to have him snag my arm and drag me back to him, shoving me into the wall.

He growled and I smirked. Oh yes, so very predictable. He started ripping at my clothing and I said, "Hey, this shirt cost me a fortune, Edward. You rip it, you buy it."

He shoved my skirt up and ripped my panties down my legs. "Well, it would be worth it. You aren't a cheap whore, now, are you?"

My breath caught. Somewhere deep down, I realized how wrong this was. I knew what I was doing to his marriage. But I'd been hurt by men before. And, what is the old adage? A leopard couldn't change their spots? I was trying, hard. But…I just wasn't sure I could. The fact remained, I did _not _like being called a whore. I didn't, however, show it, and fired back with, "You know it, honey. And maybe it's time you started paying me for my troubles."

He laughed as his body lined up with mine. "You know, in these stilts, you're just at the perfect height…"

"For what?" I asked, but then I felt him thrust into me. I cried out as my pussy clenched him. I hadn't even noticed him slipping the condom on. "Edward…" I whimpered.

"That's it. You like that, don't you? You like it when I fuck you, don't you?"

"Yessss…"

His hands were everywhere as he fondled my breasts roughly. I loved it. His hand danced down to my clit and I saw stars as he tossed me over the edge. He pulled out and I whimpered at the loss of contact. I turned toward him, but he shoved me into the wall again. "No, I don't even want to see your face today."

"So, I'm a faceless fuck now, am I, Edward?"

"You're always faceless because you mean nothing to me," he growled. "You're nothing but a whole for me to stick my dick in."

"Is that what you think?" I taunted.

He growled and shoved into me again, but not where I was expecting. I felt a tear leak out of my eye as he thrust into my asshole. "God, Edward…fuck. That hurts!"

"I'm a bastard, didn't you know?" he said as he licked my neck. His fingers tempted and teased my clit again and I felt the pain give way to pleasure and I couldn't help the moan.

"Yes, that's it," he cooed into my ear. "You really are a whore, you like this, don't you? You like me fucking your ass, don't you?"

"Fuck you," I said, even though, he was right. He was a bastard, and I did like it. I just wondered what that said about me.

He started grunting and I knew that meant he was close. "Come for me, Eddie. You know you love fucking your little whore. You know you love having me on the side. You know your precious _Bella _wouldn't let you fuck _her _up the ass. Only me. I'm the only one that can do this to you, I'm the only one that can make you feel this way. Come for me."

He let out a roar, pulling my head back hard by my hair as he came.

He pushed himself away from me physically and I smirked as I turned around. "What's the matter, Eddie? Didn't you enjoy yourself?"

"We can't do this anymore," he said as he sat down hard on the chair.

I smiled as I knelt before him. I took the condom off, tossed it into the trash bin, and kissed the head of his still semi-hard erection. "Come on, Edward, we both know what we're doing. And we both know you need me. Seriously? Do you really think your precious wife would let you do half the shit to her that you do to me? You need me just like I need you."

"No, I have to make things work with my wife."

"You'll come back to me, Edward." _They always do. _

"No, I won't. I'll see you around. I can't _not _see you, can I? But…not like this."

"Fine," I said on a snarl. "Go on and go!"

I watched as he pulled his pants back up and he walked out the door. I picked up my shirt and slid it back on, tucking it into my skirt. I picked up my panties, sliding them on as well. I smirked as I looked at the door. _Let's see what Miss Bella thinks when she realizes you __**aren't**__ Mr. Perfect, Edward. _"Let the games begin."

* * *

**Bella POV**

To say my day had been anywhere close to normal would be a gross injustice. Edward had taken off to the hospital to check on some patients and knowing that Esme would probably appreciate the help, I decide to head off in my own car and just meet him there.

Edward had been attentive and sweet the entire morning, almost too much so. After our shower he had toweled off my body and carried me back to our bed despite my squeals of protest. Next was breakfast in bed, followed by him insisting I stay there and relax while he tidied up around the house. Every few minutes he would come back for a chaste kiss or to check and see if I needed anything.

_Weird was not the word for it._

It was like he was trying so hard to make up for something, but what? If anyone should be playing the groveling servant card, it should be me. But there I was; lapping that shit up like a kitten to milk, when just a few hours earlier I had been snuggled in bed with his brother.

_I should have 'Bitch' tattooed across my forehead._

Or at least in a visible place where I could see it because as soon as he had walked out the door, my hand was reaching for the phone to call Emmett.

Twenty three calls later and I still had not talked to him. After the fifth message left on his cell I decided to try the house. Not wanting to raise Jasper's suspicion, I had called the home phone, asking if Alice was there. With a telling sigh, he informed me she had caught wind of a big sale and had flown out the door. Casually, I asked to speak to Emmett.

I caught a moment of hesitation in his voice, before he said that Em had been holed up in his room all day and he thought it best to not disturb him.

So every few minutes, I hit the redial for his cell in hopes that he would pick up. My only assumption was that he was upset at me for sneaking away while he slept. More than once I caught myself in the wrong lane of traffic heading for my in-law's house while I pushed at the buttons on my phone, sending him text after text of apologies. And still not a word back from him.

I finally pulled up at the expansive white house and let myself in the back door. Delicious smells wafted through the air as I called out towards the kitchen.

"Esme?"

No answer was returned, but the aroma of garlic and spices led me through the family room to the place I was sure to find her.

I made my way to the kitchen, only to be accosted by my extremely attractive in-laws, getting quite hot and heavy over the granite island. Both their backs were to me as he spooned in behind her, the khaki skirt she was wearing inched higher by his hands as soft sighs drifted from her lips.

"Mmmm, Carlisle. Don't stop."

I backed away, hoping to go unseen, when my foot caught on the doorstep, sending me flat on my ass.

The pair jumped at the noise, both flushing bright red at being caught in such an intimate moment. My own skin flared at being the one to have done so.

"Oh, Bella, sweetie I had no idea you were here," Esme mumbled while hurriedly tucking in her shirt and smoothing her skirt.

"Sorry, I called your name. I guess…you didn't hear me. I should have… ummm…" My words faltered trying to come up with a good excuse for disrupting such a private moment.

"Nonsense," Carlisle responded while offering his hand to help me up. "Our house is your house, you know that. What can I say? Sometimes it is hard to keep my hands off this beautiful woman."

He sent a quick slap to her bottom, which was returned with even more blushing, by both Esme _and _myself as he left the room chuckling under his breath.

"Well, dear, sorry you had to witness that. You know how our men can get sometimes, right?"

I hung my head at the thought. Yes, I did know exactly how 'our' men could be, both of the younger ones in fact.

"So, where is Edward? He didn't get called into the hospital, did he?" she asked while stirring the large pot of sauce on the stove.

"No, he just went to check on some patients. I told him I would drive on over here and see if you needed some help with lunch."

She tossed me an apron from the pantry and directed me towards the cutting board surrounded by vegetables.

"That was so thoughtful of you. And I really could use the help. I got a little distracted earlier so an extra pair of hands would be great." She gave me a quick wink before she turned back to the pot on the stove.

I rolled my eyes at the comment before letting out a little chuckle. At least it was nice to see one older married couple who had not lost their spark for each other. I could only hope that Edward and I would one day be the same way.

_Or Emmett_. I thought to myself.

I went on autopilot as Esme launched into a recap of her week, every once in a while interjecting an um-huh or a nod to seem as though I was paying attention. When in effect my mind was trying to reconcile that no matter which one I chose, I was going to destroy the family that I adored.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't realize that a couple of familiar voices had joined us in the kitchen, until I looked up to see both Jasper and Emmett, standing across the kitchen island from me.

"Hey, Bells. What's up? Where is that no good husband of yours? I have a bone to pick with him," Jasper asked, popping a cucumber in his mouth.

I watched the line of Emmett's lips tighten as he bore his eyes into mine.

"Umm, he had to run by the hospital, but he'll be here later." I mumbled.

I watched as Esme scooted in between Jasper and Emmett to grab a handful of onions. For just a moment it seemed as though Japer tensed against her touch, but then it was gone. I glanced back up from my cutting to see Emmett still staring at me.

"I hope you boys aren't fighting. I can't stand it when any of you are ill at each other. Not to mention my furniture. The last time Edward and Emmett got into a scuffle I had to replace the lamp in the den." Esme said as she bumped Emmett's hip playfully.

He looked down and gave her a sad smile before mumbling something under his breath about needing a drink and leaving the room.

"What is wrong with Emmett, Jasper?" I questioned, not exactly sure I wanted to hear the answer.

"I have no idea. I swear, Edward is supposed to be the Emo one, you know? We rode together after Esme called and invited us to lunch. I couldn't get a hold of Alice, probably eyeball deep in designer shoes. So, I left her a voice mail to meet me here and just rode with Em. He did not say two words the whole way here. I don't know what has his panties in a wad, but it must be some major shit for him to act that way."

"Maybe I should go talk to him?" I asked.

Both Jazz and Esme gave me a strange look, but then silently nodded as I began taking off my apron.

I was headed through the den, towards the stairs that led to the downstairs media room, when the back door swung open. An exuberant Edward swooped in grabbing me around the waist. Swinging me as he went, he finally sat me down, only to bow me over while his lips crashed into my mine.

His tongue probed my mouth as his hands drifted down to my ass, gently massaging, pulling me towards him. Without thought, my hands found their way into his hair as I moaned into his lips. I allowed myself to get lost in the sensation of his touch. Forgetting everything but the feel of his hands and mouth on my skin, I surrendered myself completely to his embrace.

Without warning, a large crack pulled me from my haze. My eyes whipped around to Emmett standing at the entrance to the room, his tumbler of amber liquid shattered on to the hardwood floors, the remnants of glass at his feet.

Edward's eyes bulged at the site of his brother's hand covered in alcohol and rivulets of blood. It was obvious that he had not dropped his glass but had somehow crushed it in his hand.

"Whoa, big guy, you alright?" he said as he released me and made his way across the room. "Let me see that, you may need stitches," Edward said, reaching for Emmett's still clenched fist.

"Back the fuck off, Edward." He grunted, his eyes never moving from where I was still standing.

I wasn't sure whether to go to Emmett or not. My feet were rooted to the ground as my breath came in shallow gasps.

"Emmett, I am serious, let me look at it." Edward stated as he attempted to grasp his hand again.

Slowly he lifted it to Edward's eye level, never once taking his eyes away from mine. It seemed like hours we stood with our gazes locked, though mere seconds had passed. I could not bear the contempt that seemed to be directed towards me.

"I'm sorry," I mouthed as I fled from the room.

I barely made it to the kitchen before the tears started to flow.

_All my fault, all my fault…_

Esme and Jasper, deep in conversation beside the sink, looked up to see my weeping form.

"Bella, sweetie what's wrong?' Esme asked. Her voice was so full of concern that it sent my sobs into even deeper hysterics.

"Em…oh God, he cut…his hand. Edward…"

"Jasper, go find Carlisle and tell him to get his medical bag. Bella…just sit, try to calm down. We have two doctors in the house. I am sure it is nothing that can't be fixed." She patted my shoulder before she headed to the cabinets, pulling out a handful of towels.

"Can't be…fixed, Esme. I'm sorry…so sorry." I whispered.

She gave me a strange look, stopping to pull my head to her chest, softly stroking my hair.

"Everything can be fixed. Believe me." And with that, she was gone out the door, leaving me to sob into the dishrag she had dropped on the table in front of me.

I still had my head laid on the table when the entire family filed into the kitchen.

I glanced up through blurry eyes to see Emmett holding his bandaged hand close to his chest. He had stopped directly beside me, so close I could still smell the antiseptic along with the bourbon he had been drinking. I made to stand up when Edward's tight arms wrapped me from behind.

"Are you alright, love? I know how much blood bothers you."

"I'm fine. Are you…" I reached out to touch Emmett's arm but he jerked back like he had been burned. I caught the moan that tried to escape.

"Is he okay?" I whispered.

"Just some superficial lacerations. And he had quite a few hunks of glass we had to remove, but that was the worst of it. Boy just doesn't know his own strength, now do you?" Edward asked, releasing me to give Emmett a playful punch to the shoulder.

"I think I know my strengths and my weaknesses, brother. Now if you and dad are through playing Operation on me, I am going to get another drink and wait for lunch."

The entire room fell silent as he left the room without another word. Esme exchanged glances with Carlisle while Jasper stared at Edward, leaving me to bore an invisible hole into the ceiling while chewing on my lip hard enough to break the tender skin.

The silence was broken by Jasper's obnoxious braying.

"Fuck me, Edward. Are you and Emmett both on the rag? First you pissing and moaning last night and now him with a stick shoved up his ass. Is there some sort of shot I need to get to ward off the hormones? 'Cause I sort of like having my man card, whether you two pussies want to keep yours or not."

"Umm…Jasper. Do you think we could have this conversation some other time? You know when my parents are not here, though I am sure they are fascinated by your language." Edward shot Jasper a look that would freeze molten lava, but the words just kept flowing.

"Well we wouldn't have to have this conversation if my best friend didn't have a fucking conniption last night over me fuck…" The door to the oven slammed shut forcefully as Esme pulled a tray of garlic bread and set it on the counter.

"You know, boys, lunch is ready. I think your father and I will check on Emmett while you two bring everything to the table." Esme pulled off her apron and hurled it towards Jasper. "And no more talk of man cards and sticks and well you know…behave. I swear it is like you two are still teenagers sometimes."

As soon as she left the room, I slowly rose from the table and directed Jasper towards the large container of spaghetti and Edward towards the salad bowl while I gathered the bread into a warming basket.

"Man, this smells so good!" Jasper exclaimed holding the pot under his nose, deeply inhaling. "I am about to starve. Especially after the workout I had last night."

Edward's eyes narrowed slightly, but quickly returned to normal as I thrust the salad tongs into the bowl.

"I'm with you on that. Worked up quite an appetite myself, earlier this morning. Wouldn't you agree, Bells?" Edward smirked as he headed behind Jasper to the dining room the two of them chuckling at the blatant sexual innuendos.

I grabbed the basket of bread along with some salad dressings and slightly nodded my head.

The boys may be hungry…but I had suddenly lost my appetite._**

* * *

**_

We were well into the meal and I prayed that no one was noticing that I had done nothing more than push my pasta around the plate.

Edward and his father were deep in conversation about some big time surgeon and a new procedure he had been perfecting. Most of the language was so far out of my scope that I could not have kept up even if I _had_ been interested.

Jasper and Esme were discussing some new program that they had both found interesting on the History channel, leaving Emmett and myself to a staring contest.

Every time I looked up from my plate, he was staring at me. Each time I offered a smile and every time I got a scowl before he returned to pushing his food around his plate as well. I had yet to see him take more than a few bites of his food, although he seemed to have a never ending supply being funneled into his wine glass.

After a few more moments, Esme seemed to realize that the two of us were not engaging in conversation.

"So, Emmett, we haven't heard much from you lately. What have you been up to?" Esme asked as she pushed the bread basket towards him.

"Not much really, just working," he muttered towards his plate.

"Just working? Really honey, you work too much. Now tell me, do you have anybody special that you are seeing?" I could see him physically tense at the question.

He lifted his head and looked directly into my eyes. I felt the few bites of pasta churn in my stomach as my hand gripped the napkin laid across my lap.

"No. I mean I thought I had…but no. There is no one special."

He grabbed his glass and turned it up, gulping down the contents in one long swing before quickly refilling it.

"I'm sorry, dear. I wasn't trying to pry. I just want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy. I know one day that perfect girl is going to show up and just turn your world upside down." She gave him a bright smile and a quick wink. "Just think, one day you will have your own Bella - just like Edward does."

_God, please, just let the earth swallow me up now._

Edward looked towards his brother and gave him a crooked grin while reaching for my hand under the table and bringing it to his lips.

"I don't know about that, Mom. There is only one Bella and I was lucky enough to land her. However, I am sure Em will find _his_ perfect girl one day."

I watched the pain ripple across Emmett's face as his eyes locked onto our entwined hands. I gently tugged, trying to pull mine away from Edward's but he just readjusted his grip, pulling them into his lap. He cocked his eyebrow at Emmett before shoveling another forkful of food into his mouth with his free hand.

Pain turned to anger as Emmett's fork clattered onto his plate.

"Well, actually, little brother, I do have my sights set on someone. And I don't plan on stopping until I have made her mine." He threw his napkin on the table and made to stand up.

_Oh God, Oh God…here it goes. _

I tried to shut my eyes, but I was frozen like a deer in the headlights as I waited for the inevitable.

Edward's eyes twinkled mischievously towards his brother. "So, is it the tiger from the other night? You know the one with the scratches?"

Oh Jesus, he had seen the marks I had left. I could feel my food slowly starting to make its way back up from my stomach and I wondered if I had time to remove the sharp pieces of silverware in Edward's hand, lest they be turned into a weapon.

"Actually, it is. And there is something you…"

A rush of air and Chanel filled the room as Alice glided through the open dining room door.

"I am so sorry I am late everyone! I did not get Jasper's message until just a little while ago and I had to rush home and change before I could head over here." She quickly kissed Esme and Carlisle's cheeks before settling into her seat.

"You just got my message? I called you hours ago. Where were you? What were you doing?" Jasper fired off each question in quick succession.

Alice turned and gave him a pointed stare.

"I told you I was going shopping and that's where I was. I did not realize I had left my phone in the car. Would you like a detailed timeline, Jasper?" she snapped, reaching for a piece of bread.

"I, um… I just couldn't get you…and I…" Jasper's voice trailed as he stared at his plate.

Edward took a long drink from his glass before turning towards Alice and chuckling under his breath.

"Shopping again, Alice? You know when you and Jasper finally do get married you will have to have a spare bedroom just for your shoes. Thank goodness Bella hates to shop, right, love?"

I watched as her eyes narrowed and her perfectly manicured fingernails tapped on the table top.

"Well Edward, what can I say…? Nordstrom waits for no man. Which reminds me, Bella, I need to talk to you after dinner. It is very important."

I nodded my head just as a large amount of Edward's wine got stuck in his throat and he spit it across the tablecloth. I turned and gently hit his back as he tried to catch his breath.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yes, just went down the wrong pipe. Ummm… Jasper didn't you say something about taking Alice to a movie after lunch?"

"Well, yes I was hoping to." Jasper turned in his chair towards Alice. "I mean, I know it is spur of the moment, but we have not to spend a lot of time together lately."

"I would love to, Jazz, but I really need to go to the office and work for a while. I have got to get…"

"Not again, Alice. I swear it is like I need to make an appointment to spend time with you anymore!" He threw his napkin down, pushing his chair away from the table.

"What do you mean? I have to work, Jasper. This client is one of my most important. You know how much it will mean to land his business. Why are we going through this again?"

"Why? Because there is ALWAYS some emergency at work or some sale or some reason you can not be with me. I have to be important too, Alice!"

He shot out of his chair and barreled from the room. I watched as tears began to form in Alice's eyes.

"I am sorry for ruining your lunch, Esme. If you would excuse me…" She quickly exited the room amid her soft sobbing.

"You know, I think I have had enough for one afternoon myself. I think I am just going to go downstairs and watch some TV, give those two a little time before I see if Jasper needs a ride home." Emmett said slowly rising from the table and leaving the room as well.

The four of us sat in silence for another moment. Gradually Edward and his father picked up their previous conversation and I began helping Esme gather up the dirty dishes.

We had everything brought back to the kitchen as I started to scrape the plates into the trash can.

"Bella, sweetie, why don't you go check on Emmett? You have always been able to lift his spirits and he seems like he could use a friend now. Knowing Edward, he and Carlisle will be talking shop for the next hour."

Slowly I set the plates upon the counter and made my way to the stairs leading to the family room. I hesitated, wondering if I should even try to talk to Emmett. I gathered my courage and made my way silently down the stairs. There he was, sitting on the large sofa, staring at the blank TV screen. I cleared my throat. He turned his head towards me and I was overwhelmed by the sadness in his eyes.

"What do you want?" he asked.

"I wanted to make sure you were alright." I crossed the short distance to the couch and stood behind him, wanting to sink my hands in his thick hair.

"I'm just great. I mean, why wouldn't I be? I have totally fucked my life all to hell. I am in love with someone who doesn't love me back. I am either going to destroy myself or my family. Why would I not be great?"

The sigh that escaped my lips was not lost on him. He turned quickly and grabbed my wrists and pulled me into his lap.

"Tell me. Tell me right now what last night meant to you!" he growled.

I struggled in his embrace, not completely sure if I was scared or aroused by his tone.

"What do you mean? It was wonderful. And I am sorry I left without telling you goodbye, but you were sleeping so peacefully and I know you are mad…"

"I am not mad about that. I came to your house, Bella. To-to see you…to…be with you. B-but I saw…" His voice trailed off as his head flung backwards to the couch.

"What, Emmett? What did you see?" I pulled his face until his eyes were locked with mine.

"You and Edward…making love. I had brought you some flowers and I knocked but you didn't…you didn't come…so I went to the patio door…and oh fuck…I saw you two. And I don't know what the fuck I am doing anymore. I don't want you with him…don't you understand?" His voice and words were coming in such rapid succession and the hurt in them was so thick that it took me a moment to comprehend everything he was saying.

_He saw…he saw Edward and I. Together_.

"Emmett, I don't know what you want me to say. I am so confused. What we shared last night meant so much to me. But I still…I still love Edward. And I don't know if it is because I don't know how to not love him or what."

My head dropped down to his neck and I breathed in his scent making the tears once again well in my eyes.

"And what about me, Bella? Where do I stand in all this?"

"I don't think I can be without you now. " My lips found his collarbone and I allowed my tongue to swirl against his flesh as one of his hands slid underneath my shirt, tracing circles upon my back while the other snaked into my hair. He gently tugged until we were staring into each other's eyes once more.

"You know you can't have us both, right?"

I silently nodded while my eyes traced the contours of his face, finally resting upon his lips.

"Then I will give you the time to decide exactly who and what you want. But just so you know, I was not kidding. I am going to do everything I can to make you mine."

His lips crashed against mine as his hands traveled back under my shirt, this time going to the front. His large hands palmed my breasts as I felt his erection grow through his jeans. My breath hitched as one hand traveled down and began massaging my clit through the thin material of my slacks.

"Fuck, need you now," he whispered as he rose from the couch, sweeping me in his arms bridal style.

His eyes searched the room, finally landing on the door to the small adjoining bath.

"I know it is not the romantic place, but I need to be in you… now," he said as he headed towards the open door.

I didn't care where we were going. I didn't care that my husband was right upstairs. Didn't care that my best friend was fighting with her fiancé and was upstairs crying her eyes out…my only coherent thought was of being as close as humanly possible to this man that had just told me he loved me and was going to fight for me.

He sat me down in front of the bathroom door and my hands slipped into the waistband of his jeans. I licked my lips at the thought of what was going to happen.

"What are you two doing?" echoed through the room as we both turned our heads to the sight of my mother in law, standing at the bottom of the stairs.

* * *


End file.
